Enquire Within Upon Everything Part 157

2. Name in full.

3. s.e.x and age.

4. Rank or profession.

5. Cause of death.

6. Signature, description, and residence of the person giving the information.

7. Date of the registration.

A certificate of the cause of death must be obtained from the medical man in attendance, who is required to state when he last saw the patient.

1965. Persons dying at Sea.

The commander of any British vessel, on board of which a death occurs at sea, must act the same as in a case of birth.

1966. Certificates of Death.

Every registrar must deliver to the undertaker, _without fee_, a certificate of the death, which certificate shall be delivered to the officiating minister. No dead body can be buried without such certificate, under a penalty of 10.

1967. Observances of Deaths and Funerals.

It is usual, when a death takes place, to communicate it immediately, upon mourning note-paper, to the princ.i.p.al members of the family, and to request them to notify the same to the more remote relatives in their circle. A subsequent note should state the day and hour at which the funeral is fixed to take place.

1968. Special Invitations.

Special invitations to funerals are not considered requisite to be sent to near relatives; but to friends and acquaintances such invitations should be sent.

1969. Gloves.

Most persons who attend funerals will provide themselves with gloves; but it is well to have a dozen pairs, of a.s.sorted sizes, provided in case of accident. An arrangement can be made for those not used to be returned.

1970. Hatbands and Cloaks.

Hatbands and Cloaks will be provided by the undertaker.

1971. Mourning.

The dressmaker will advise upon the "degree" of mourning to be worn, which must be modified according to the age of the deceased, and the relations.h.i.+p of the mourner. The undertaker will advise respecting the degree of mourning to be displayed upon the carriages, horses, &c.

[WE INCREASE OUR WEALTH WHEN WE LESSEN OUR DESIRES.]

1972. Going to the Funeral.

In going to the Funeral the nearest relatives of the deceased occupy the carriages nearest the hea.r.s.e. The same order prevails in returning. Only the relatives and most intimate friends of the family should return to the house after the funeral; and their visit should be as short as possible.

1973. Walking Funerals.

In Walking Funerals it is considered a mark of respect for friends to become pall-bearers. In the funerals of young persons, the pall should be borne by their companions, wearing white gloves. It is a pretty and an affecting sight to see the pall over the coffin of a young lady borne by six of her female friends. Flowers may be placed, upon the coffin, and strewed in and over the grave.

1974. Societies.

As funerals in England, when conducted in ths ordinary way, with the usual display of hea.r.s.e, mourning carriages, and costly mourning, are attended with considerable expense, societies have been formed in many parishes with the view of reducing the outlay resorted to on these occasions, and at a time perhaps when it would be better in many cases to observe the strictest economy. The members of these societies agree among themselves to do all that is possible to reduce expenditure at funerals, and to render the accompaniments of the sad ceremony as inexpensive as possible. Instead of going into mourning, many now content themselves with wearing a simple band of cloth round the left arm. This is done by women as well as by men.

1975. Visits of Condolence.

Visits of condolence after funerals should be paid by relatives within from a week to a fortnight; by friends within the second week of the fortnight; friends of less intimacy should make enquiries and leave cards.

1976. Correspondence.

Correspondence with families in mourning should be upon black-edged paper, if from members of the family; or upon the ordinary notepaper, but sealed with black, if from friends.

1977. Ceremonies.

All ceremonies are in themselves superficial things; yet a man of the world should know them. They are the outworks of manners and decency, which would be too often broken in upon, if it were not for that defence which keeps the enemy at a proper distance. It is for that reason we always treat fools and c.o.xcombs with great ceremony, true good-breeding not being a sufficient barrier against them.

1978. Love's Telegraph.

If a gentleman want a wife, he wears a ring on the _first_ finger of the left hand; if he be engaged, he wears it on the _second_ finger; if married, on the _third_; and on the fourth if he never intends to be married. When a lady is not engaged, she wears a hoop or diamond on her _first_ finger; if engaged, on the _second_; if married, on the _third_; and on the fourth if she intends to die unmarried. When a gentleman presents a fan, flower, or trinket, to a lady with the _left_ hand, this, on his part, is an overture of regard; should she receive it with the _left_ hand, it is considered as an acceptance of his esteem; but if with the _right_ hand, it is a refusal of the offer. Thus, by a few simple tokens explained by rule, the pa.s.sion of love is expressed; and through the medium of the telegraph, the most timid and diffident man may, without difficulty, communicate his sentiments of regard to a lady, and, in case his offer should be refused, avoid experiencing the mortification of an explicit refusal.

1979. Wedding Rings.

The custom of wearing wedding rings appears to have taken its rise among the Romans. Before the celebration of their nuptials, there was a meeting of friends at the house of the lady's father, to settle articles of the marriage contract, when it was agreed that the dowry should be paid down on the wedding day or soon after. On this occasion there was commonly a feast, at the conclusion of which the man gave to the woman, as a pledge, a ring, which she put on the fourth finger of her left hand, _because it was believed that a nerve reached thence to the heart_, and a day was then named for the marriage.

1980. Why the Wedding Ring is placed on the Fourth Finger.

"We have remarked on the vulgar error which supposes that an artery runs from the fourth finger of the left hand to the heart. It is said by Swinburn and others, that therefore it became the wedding finger. The priesthood kept up this idea by still retaining it as the wedding finger, but the custom is really a.s.sociated with the doctrine of the Trinity; for, in the ancient ritual of English marriages, the ring was placed by the husband on the top of the thumb of the left hand, with the words, 'In the name of the father;'

he then removed it to the forefinger, saying, 'In the name of the Son;' then to the middle finger, adding, 'And of the Holy Ghost;'

finally, he left it as now, on the fourth finger, with the closing word, 'Amen.'"

_The History and Poetry of Finger Rings_.

1981. The Art of being Agreeable.

The true art of being agreeble is to appear well pleased with all the company, and rather to seem well entertained with them than to bring entertainment to them. A man thus disposed, perhaps may not have much learning, nor any wit; but if he has common sense and something friendly in his behaviour, it conciliates men's minds more than the brightest parts without this disposition; and when a man of such a turn comes up to old age, he is almost sure to be treated with respect. It is true, indeed, that we should not dissembie and flatter in company; but a man may be very agreeable, strictly, consistent with truth and sincerity, by a prudent silence where he cannot concur, and a pleasing a.s.sent where he can. Now and then you meet a person so exactly formed to please, that he will gain upon everyone that hears or beholds him: this disposition is not merely the gift of nature, but frequently the effect of much knowledge of the world, and a command over the pa.s.sions.