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Chapter 209
Take me
Recalling the date Chaser said, I smiled in despair. It will be……. only a few days left.
I smiled with my head bowed and slowly lifted my head. Behind me was a hand gripping my waist.
When I turned my back, there was Ricdorian looking at me with worried eyes. The eyelashes that fell gracefully while looking at me drew a round curve. He looked like he was about to cry.
“It’s okay.”
I grabbed his hand and patted him. For some reason, I felt like I had to forget what I was thinking right now and say this instead. I was silent for a moment, then added a word.
“Because my mind is cool.”
I really meant it. To me, it was better to see at a glance that it was an uncomfortable th.o.r.n.y road, like walking in a fog, even if it was a ploy. Because we can come up with a solution.
‘I must have a lot to think about.’
I don’t have much time, though.
“Iana, do you know the face you’re making right now?”
“What kind of face is that?”
“… it was your face when you asked me why I didn’t put you on shackles when you first came here.”
Without realizing it, I touched my cheek. What face was I making? I didn’t know what face he was talking about. But I understand that this face made Ricdorian sad enough to look like that.
“I don’t know, but it’s not something to feel okay about, is it?”
“It is.”
Just as my guardian spirit is like me. It was just a pity that it was locked up for such a long time.
“But I don’t want you to make a face like that, Ricdorian.”
“…….”
“Um, so don’t.”
I grabbed his head and let him lean on my shoulder. Then I patted it a little.
Once again, I thought that I had escaped Domulit. And the thought that I wasn’t even in Marquisate Valtaize, where I stayed comfortably for a short time. The presence of the man with a face that looked like he was about to cry was great.
Francia could be seen over Ricdorian’s shoulder. She stared intently into Ricdorian, then pouted her mouth and raised her finger at me.
Then she grabbed her lips and stretched them out, pretending to cut it off, then put her hand around her neck and slashed it all the way. I’ll kill the pervert! As if I could hear a voice saying that, I burst out a small smile.
I lowered my gaze for a moment, then met Francia’s eyes. My lips called out to her without a sound. She nodded as she muttered a little with the shape of her mouth.
‘I’m doing it because it’s Sister’s request.’
I responded with the shape of her mouth.
‘You’re jealous.’
Then she grabbed Lenag and left the room. The door closed and only the two of us were left in the room, me and Ricdorian. I noticed that Lenag had looked at me once before leaving, but left without saying a word. It was a face that showed that he would follow me no matter what I did.
A bitter laugh flowed out.
A cool breeze blew into the quiet room, no, terrace. But I could not feel the cold much. Because his large body almost wrapped around me. I reached out and placed my hand on top of his hair.
The silver hair that was gently fluttering was wrapped around my fingers. Dyed in a soft blue hue that suits the moonlight of this night.
“Ricdorian. It’s out of context, but I have something to tell you.”
I said to the man who was too big to lean on my shoulder that he had to bow down for a long time.
Then, as if noticing that the words were rather unusual, strength entered the arm wrapped around my waist. He buried his face further on my shoulder without looking at me. Like a large beast that was acting like a baby.
“…… I don’t like it when you say you’re abandoning me.”
He mumbled in a pleading. The buried voice was m.u.f.fled, but it was not difficult to understand. I smiled and shook my head. I thought he was a smart man.
“No. It’s the opposite.”
I looked at the whirl of his hair neatly arranged and slowly turned my head.
“I think the time has come to give you an answer.”
Come to think of it, Ricdorian would have developed his sixth sense like an animal. Whenever I was about to say something decisive, he instinctively noticed and changed his expression. When it’s time to say farewell in Kambrakam, or make a promise we’ll never see again.
He flinched and took his face off my shoulder.
“It’s my turn to return the answer to your confession.”
I’ve been thinking about it all along. Still, the relations.h.i.+p between the Blue Rose and the roses was full of incomprehension. It was as if I was pus.h.i.+ng my hands and swimming between what I had achieved in this world and what Iana had made.
Flowers.
The world made of flower-like people. Each of them harbored indescribable wounds, each with a suffocatingly beautiful fragrance. Like the man who has lost all his childhood in the cold underground of Kambrakam.
Ricdorian was staring at me, frozen and nervous. The hand holding me didn’t let go, as if it would never go no matter what I said. Ricdorian bit his lip.
“…… Should I cry?”
“I don’t know.”
I smiled lightly and brought my hand to his lips.
“Don’t bite your lips.”
“…….”
“It will hurt.”
His eyes fluttered for a moment. His blue eyes seemed to glisten with water. Under the soft moonlight, my guardian deity was still singing a happy song from a very distant place.
I smiled and opened my mouth slowly. With a broad smile.
“I love you.”
His eyes widened the most they could be. And I couldn’t help but look into his eyes and say it over and over again.
“And I think I should apologize to you.”
Being indifferent to others and to myself means that I have lived without knowing myself well. Chaser lied that the Blue Rose can’t love, but me and ‘Iana’ also loved.
Loved the colorful roses here, like those who have the names of the roses.
“I like you. Now I think I know what this feeling for you is.”
I muttered, pressing my chest tight. But, I whispered. At this point in time when I realized that love is love, I knew one more thing.
“Ricdorian, if the love you speak of is exclusive love that excludes others.”
“…….”
“I will probably never throw away the other roses.”
It was a sudden realization that came to me the moment I knew the existence of the guardian deity.
I will not abandon Francia and Lenag.
“I may not be able to focus all my heart on you.”
To throw them away meant to separate the body and mind. Then it was clear that I couldn’t focus solely on Ricdorian. I know that this is love, which tickles every corner of my heart and fills it with warmth.
However, I gave Lenag love. Rather, it was a realization that I realized by looking at Chaser’s misunderstood feelings and Lenag’s honest feelings and seeing their love. I couldn’t turn away from what I had blossomed.
“So.”
I know the blind feelings that Ricdorians show me. My appearance may annoy him.
“I.”
“It does not matter.”
Ricdorian cut my words firmly.
“I only care about one thing.”
“Ricdorian.”
“Do you love me?”
“…….”
I met his eyes.
“Right.”
I know that too. Talking round and round was not my style.
“I love you.”
“Only me?”
“…… only you.”
My heart started beating weakly. Whether he knew this or not, Ricdorian pressed our lips together like stamping his on mine.
“Once more.”
He pressed it again, not even paying attention to me blinking in surprise.
“One more time, huh?”
The languid, sunken eyes were filled with uncontrollable heat.
“…… no.”
“Haa, Iana.”
“…… Because if you do it again, it will wear out. I want you to reconsider.”
There was a saying that if we like someone, we’ll look alike. I turned my face away, mimicking Ricdorian’s usual act of covering his lips with the back of his hand.
However, Ricdorian moved his face to follow my face as if he had no intention of letting go of me. The blue eyes followed.
“Iana.”
“Don’t call me.”
It wasn’t an intense tremor. However, the tremor that flowed from the heart must have colored the world, which has been an indifferent black and white, with color.
When I slowly turned my eyes, there was a man’s face with an expression I couldn’t describe.
Before I could even take a glance, his lips covered me. It was still a clumsy but raw kiss. I slowly closed my eyes. The impatient hand pulled the ribbon above my chest. It wasn’t the clothes that went down with the ribbon untied today, but…….
I laughed softly.
“What. The second round that you couldn’t do that time?”
When his lips parted slightly, he took a deep breath, and his eyes followed me. All of a sudden, Ricdorian’s hand had the completely untied ribbon, no, now a string, and it was fluttering in the air.
“You become like this as soon as I confessed. Was my body really your purpose?”
In spite of my laughter, Ricdorian slowly lowered his eyes instead of smiling. An innocent and n.o.ble face was revealed under the moonlight. Contrary to his pure white face, the reddish lips slowly opened.
“No.”
The sunken eyes made it impossible to determine which side of his personality was this. He took my ribbon, kissed it and pulled it off.
Then his eyes turned to me. His fingers went down again and placed in front of his neck.
“I’m going to do this.”
He took my hand and made the ribbon wrap around his neck. As if it would be a pretty neck decoration if tied up, the red string on his white neck was very well matched.
He lowered his head and bit my lip slightly without pain. With the tips of his ears and the nape of his neck dyed red. He pulled his lips off and slowly folded one knee.
“It’s not that I have you. Iana.”
A low but clear voice filled my ears. I think I liked this voice in Kambrakam too.
“You take me.”
“…….”
“I’ll be a beast if you keep me chained and you show up anytime.”
For the man who was being imprisoned for half of his life, imprisonment is more terrifying than anything else.
“Please allow love only to me.”
He held out the end of the string he had tied up to me.
“If only I could save it for me.”
He grabbed the back of my thigh and pulled it towards him. My skirt lifts, revealing my white ankles.
“I will gladly close my eyes on your rose garden.”
Ricdorian put my foot on one of his thighs sweetly, then grabbed my calf and lifted it up, touching my ankle with his lips.
“…… I love you.”
His hand went down under the skirt that went up to my calf and dug into it little by little. I kept my lips shut so as not to let out a moan at the strange touch.
“Tell me please.”
His eyes closed gently. His ears and neck were dyed red. But I had to admit at this moment that he was a gentle beast only to me.
“Your love is mine.”
Because the man’s face who had been dyed white and blue with l.u.s.t was clearly visible in this place where the night had descended.
“Right?”