The Devil Is Evolution Catalog Chapter 208: You Must Be Joking

“It's all right, as long as she receives timely energy nourishments, she should be able to hold out till Six-stars at which that malaise would disappear. Take care however, the little la.s.s needs to maintain a sufficient level of energy or else. No matter what, she mustn't starve.” This matter concerned the life and death of his niece so Sidarth made sure to emphasize that last point in the gravest of tones.

“That energy source must've come from a Five-stars Fire Elemental Core, I bet. The energies within that crystal are extremely pure and matches the la.s.s's element perfectly. Thankfully, such strict requirements are no longer needed since the most difficult phase, childbirth, has already pa.s.sed. Keeping her well nourished is a lot easier, energy in general is enough for that.”

'From the sound of things, we just have to feed her some high energy food then, souls should do the trick. They're easy to obtain and free of impurities.'

Naturally, feeding her more cores from Fire Elementals would be preferable but clearly that wasn't a viable option. Where would we find said elementals in the first place and even if we could find them, killing them for such a reason was just despicable. Besides, their strength weren't something to scoff at either; unlike the Flame Devouring Fishes, we had no way to counteract their abilities so souls was our best option for now.

With that, the subject of Cinderel was settled for now, Sidarth turned to face me once more and said: “Speaking of which, why would a devil help a member of the h.e.l.lhounds for no reason?”

“Truth be told, I was allied with a h.e.l.lhound back during those days in the Prison of the Dead. Because of that, I've grown fond of the h.e.l.lhound clan, that's why I decided to help out Sinmosa and Sasani.”

(TL: Most of the time I try to reconcile the author's inane ramblings with the chapter, but this honestly has me stumped so I just left it as is. The bracketed text is unnecessary so feel free to skip it.)

{We live in a very practical world: just because you treat someone well doesn't mean that he will treat you well in return. However, if you were to treat someone badly, he would most definitely treat you badly. No one is actually a complete villain, even if someone like that actually exists, the odds of meeting him are one in a million.

The world isn't only a mirror but rather something more complicated than that. It can reflect your view of the world but can also show you a host of other things yet to happen as well. You merely can't see it then.}

“I knew I wasn't wrong about you, truly an outstanding youth.” Sidarth gave a laugh as he said that and then eyed Neanderke: “Brat, get over here.”

Being summoned like that, Neanderke wasn't all too willing to come over but did so anyway.

“Stop being so wishy washy about it and get here, what are you, a sissy?”

“…” As instructed, Neanderke stood before me and Sidarth, faces filled with an awkward nervousness.

Not long after that, Sidarth's lips curled in a beaming smile after which he gave the Cerberus a swift kick that caused him to stagger towards me and almost topple over. Ignoring the look Neanderke gave him, Sidarth turned to me before asking in an ingratiating tone: “This worthless dog son of mine, what do you think of him?”

(TL: It's a cultural thing here to talk about a child like that, the intention is to show humbleness rather than to insult the person in question.)

“Really strong, stronger than me at least.” Still confused as to what he was asking, I answered the question at face value. Still, the fact that Neanderke was his son surprised me. Thinking about it, was there even anything I could say about that dog? This was merely our second time meeting and if I really had to describe him, I would use the following words: 'your son is an a**hole.'

“Originally, Sinmosa would've been my first choice…regrettable, truly regrettable…” After sighing for an eternity, Sidarth finally got to the main point: “Since Sinmosa has already married Sasani, I naturally can't tear those two apart. In that case…are you willing to be my daughter-in-law? Miss Devil?”

“……”

'Someone kill me…please…'

“I said so already, I'm a male, a male, a male! Don't tell me I have repeat everything important three times before you get it?!”

In contrast to my sudden outburst, Sidarth was strangely calm about this entire affair: “You aren't being very polite, youngster.”

“Screw your f****** politeness, I'm a male, you'd better get that into all three of your heads!”

“Your s.e.x isn't decided by what you say, please get that fact straight, O beautiful devil. Even though my son might be a little dumb, if you're willing to marry him, I'll aid you in his human reconstruction.”

“What the heck is human reconstruction?! Also, why must I marry your stupid son? I already told you, I'm a male! Don't tell me your brains have gotten foggy because of old age?! In what way do I look like a female?!”

“If you're male, you should have 'that thing' too.” As he said that, he quietly glanced between my thighs before shaking his head and sighing. “Youngsters nowadays, their mood swings come and go like the wind. Not too long ago you were so polite and yet just minutes later, you're here glaring at me.”

“That thing is just on vacation for now! It will come back eventually! You hear me? You old dog!”

While calling him an old dog might not be very polite, there was no way I was going to back down after being prodded at my sore point.

Naturally, Sidarth didn't plan on taking that insult lying down either. His relaxed tone immediately changed and the mood suddenly darkened: “You're being too disrespectful right now, don't tell me I have to use force to resolve this?”

“Force?” The moment I heard the old dog say that, a chill immediately ran down my spine and I began s.h.i.+vering uncontrollably. With the way his aura seemed to press down on him, my breathing started to become ragged.

'Too strong, this h.e.l.lhound definitely isn't just a Six-stars, he is probably a Seven-stars…'

Faced with an opponent as strong as a RPG Boss, all I could do was stare helplessly at the towering Cerberus…

“Master!” Suppressing that overwhelming pressure Sidarth emitted, No.3 and Big 4 immediately rushed to s.h.i.+eld me: “Master, please step back and leave him to us…we'll hold him back while you escape…”

“Hmph! Mo Na doesn't want Mama to marry some ugly doggy!” Clearly not fazed by the Cerberus, Mo Na flew in front of me and so happened to block my face entirely: “Run Mama, Mo Na will protect you!”

“Bark bark bark!” It was then that Neanderke's excited barking echoed in the background. Because he spoke in the tongue of the h.e.l.lhounds, I couldn't understand a word he said. However, judging by those agitated looks on his faces, it probably wasn't anything good.

“Uncle, are you being serious here?” Sinmosa threw her kin a disbelieving look before shakingly saying: “Mister Mo Ke is our family's savior…we will never allow anyone to harm him…not even you.”

“Woof woof!” Sasani threw in an obligatory woof, just in case we forgot that he existed, before standing next to his wife in a show of support. Cinderel gave a couple of adorable 'ruffs' as well before scampering to her mama's side. Like that, the h.e.l.lhound family was a.s.sembled as a united front.

“What do you mean, am I serious? When has your Uncle ever been serious?” As he said that, his oppressive aura faded away in an instant. Forcing a smile onto his face, he swatted Neanderke on the face: “It's all your fault for being such a dunce, if not for that, why haven't you found a wife yet!? Even a devil finds you ugly, stupid and just plain stupid. I swear, do you even resemble me in any way? If I didn't know that your mother only loved me, I might even suspect that you aren't my son!”

A scolding for the ages and a beating later, a pitiful Neanderke stood with all three heads lowered. At that point, I wouldn't be surprised if he started crying.

Seeing her uncle give his son a thras.h.i.+ng like that simply because of his spinelessness, Sinmosa asked, albeit with exasperation in her voice: “Uncle…I don't suppose you plan on saying that you're joking again right…”

“To be honest, that wasn't completely a joke either. After all, if I managed to gain a daughter-in-law just by scaring her, it wouldn't be that bad of a deal either.” With no remorse whatsoever at having taken a joke too far, that old dog, Sidarth, laughed uproariously while continuing to slap Neanderke: “It's all your fault, you d*mn moron of a son, how can you not know the language of the devils even at this age, I should have just shot you into the ground back before you were born!”

Everyone: “…”

'Shot him into the ground huh…'

Never once did it occur to me that Sidarth would actually be this unreliable but after seeing that debacle of joke he just pulled on us, I no longer had the mood to continue talking. After all, if that mad dog went on another rampage, we would be the ones on the receiving end. I hurriedly said goodbye to this man(dog) child and rushed eastwards.

Now that we were a safe distance away from that father and son pair, I started to get a little curious about those barks Neanderke let out back when Sidarth tried to force that marriage on me.

Hearing me ask that, Sinmosa's lips curled into a smile that didn't seem like a smile at the same time: “Neaderke said this: 'That devil's so ugly, there's no way I would want her', or something along those lines.”

'I'm ugly? Haha, next time we meet, I'll definitely send him an imp babe to be his wife. I bet that old dog would be delighted.'

The territory of the Purgatory Shadowcats wasn't that far off now. If we were to increase our pace, we would most likely reach it in five days. By following Sidarth's directions, we soon found ourselves out of the hills.

Unlike the h.e.l.lhounds' territory, one which consisted of lava rivers and platforms, the territory of the Purgatory Shadowcats was basically a giant gra.s.sland. For the most part, it was a field of black weeds with some dark red mixed in. Other than that, the only other plant life we saw was a blackened tree that seemed more rock than plant. Even so, that lifeless tree somehow managed to give off the impression that it was still growing.

“An environment like this…” I muttered in slight disbelief. Truly, such an area teeming with plant life boggled the mind. There was clearly no source of water in sight, the closest thing to fluid here was lava, and yet there still existed so many plants.

“Before coming to Purgatory, the Shadowcats used to live in Abaddon. Back then, they made some preparations before making the move over. The plants you see before you are the preparation they made…” As Sinmosa said that, she almost seemed to project a wise, scholarly image.

“You're saying the Shadowcats planned this migration and also wanted to form a new evolutionary branch in Purgatory?”

I didn't know much about the Shadowcats but the moment I heard that, I suddenly had the impression that they must have had some kind of pressing reason to move here.

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“Regarding their exact motives, only the Shadowcats would know that.” Sinmosa shook her head. “This is my first time coming here as well.”

“In that case, let's just follow Elder Sidarth's suggestion and find that Purgatory Shadowcat known as Anmi. However…I have to say…Elder Sidarth doesn't seem all that reliable…what if the person he introduced is also…”