Oh Lord, Help Me Keep My Panties On Part 2

Immediately my head started to pound, and I felt an att.i.tude on the rise. I told the driver to wait a second and got out of the cab. Kavon walked me over to the sidewalk so we could be out of ear shot of the driver. "Shortie, I know that you're going kill me, but I can't find my pa.s.sport. I had it sitting on my desk today, but now it's not there!" Kavon said. I was speechless and about to lose my temper, but never changed the expression on my face. I swallowed hard, took a deep breath, rubbed my temples, and walked back to the cab. I reached into the cab for my pocketbook, pulled out his ticket and handed it to him. "Here's your ticket, I hope you make the plane," I said in a nonchalant voice. I got back into the cab, closed the door then instructed the driver to drive to airport.

When I arrived at the terminal I walked over to the first open newsstand I saw. I purchased a bottle of Advil and popped a double dose for my throbbing headache. Then I walked through the terminal to the check in and then through the security checkpoint. When I finally reach gate 9 my head felt as if it was going to explode! So I sat down closed my eyes and ma.s.saged my temples until it was time to board the plane. At five-thirty, an announcement was made that the plane was boarding pa.s.sengers. s.h.i.+t! Still no Kavon! I hope for his sake he makes it! When the second announcement was made, I got up and walked slowly to the line, handed the attendant my ticket and found my seat on the plane. Just as I sat down my cell phone rang. "Haley, what terminal are you at?" I looked at the phone and replied, "American, why, where are you?"

"I'm at Delta, aren't we leaving from Delta?" he exclaimed. "No," I said calmly. "Look at your ticket!" "s.h.i.+t, I f.u.c.ked up! I'm not at the right terminal!" he shouted. "Oh s.h.i.+t! I gotta run," and then he hung up. I was sitting with my head against the window and eyes closed when Kavon rushed pa.s.sed me sweating and breathing hard. He found a seat and sat down and tried to compose himself. He was seated a few rows behind me and didn't notice that he had walked pa.s.s me as he rushed down the isle. After the plane took off and the seatbelt lights went off, I motioned for one of the stewardess. I pointed in his direction and asked her to let Kavon know where I was sitting.

He got up from his seat and joined me. Neither Kavon nor I spoke to one another during the whole flight, and I think it was best. When we arrived in the Bahamas, we were ready to have a good time. We caught a cab to the Marriott Crystal, where we registered at the front desk then walked to our room hand in hand. As soon as we reached our room, we grabbed our bathing suits from our bags, opting to unpack later and hit the water. We bypa.s.sed the pool and headed straight for the beach. The water was warm, clean and everything I needed to calm me down.

We swam and played in the water all afternoon. We ordered drinks and something to snack on when we went back to the pool area. It was almost nightfall when we decided to go back to our room after a day of fun in the sun. We showered, dressed casual, and went out for a quiet dinner. We found a restaurant within walking distance from the hotel and sat down for a romantic dinner. Walking back to the hotel we stopped at a liquor store and bought a bottle of Grey Goose and a container of orange juice for the room. Kavon ordered a late night snack from room service and made us a couple of drinks while I took a shower and changed into a soft pink negligee. While he showered, I sat on the terrace gazing at the reflection of the moonlight on the ocean and sipped my drink slowly. He exited the bathroom wearing only a towel and joined me on the terrace. He paced around for a moment then stated that he had something important to tell me. He seemed upset and nervous then took a long swallow from his gla.s.s. Kavon then took a long breath, and then dropped the bomb. "Haley, I want you to hear me out before you say anything, okay. I haven't been totally honest with you," he said. "Latrice and Chase aren't my only kids. I have two more children that I didn't tell you about."

"Two years ago, I met this girl Channel, through a friend of mine. At the time it was no big deal. I hit it a couple of times, Channel was seeing some guy on the side and from what she told me he wasn't very attentive to her needs. So, every now and then I stop by and take care of business and kick it with her. From what I understand now, I wasn't the only one hitting on that. I found out by accident that she was doing a few guys. Anyway, the next thing I knew Channel was blowing up my phone saying that she was pregnant and that I was the father. This girl was banging so many guys at the time, I'm sure she called all of us. Well, she had the baby, but she never took me to court or anything. I never had a paternity test done and last but not least I don't pay any kind of child support through the courts. Only thing is, the kid looks just like me!" Kavon said with his head down. So, let me get this straight. I said. One, you knew or had an idea that this girl was seeing someone else, and you didn't use a condom? Two, you haven't had a paternity test, and you don't know for sure if this is your daughter, but you think the little girl is yours? "Three, you give the girl money monthly for the baby. I asked. "Yeah, I kinda feel deep down inside that she really is mine."

"That's not all," he said. Kavon reached for the bottle of Gray Goose again and poured an extra shot and threw it back. Then he dropped the other shoe on me (a Timberland I might add). I also have a newborn son by another girl. He's four months old. "What!" I exclaimed. "Please calm down, baby, I had no idea I would get so serious with you. I wanted to tell you this a while ago, but I couldn't. I was scared," he said sadly with tears in his eyes. "See, the baby's mother Renee, and I broke up on bad terms around the time we met. Renee and I got into an argument one night over me hanging out. She started cursing at me, and then she started hitting me in the face. I slapped the s.h.i.+t out of her causing her to topple over and hit her head on the floor. I grabbed my coat and walked out. When I came back two hours later after cooling off, she was sitting on the side of the bed talking on the phone to one of her friends cutting up my clothes!"

"It took everything I had not to s.n.a.t.c.h the scissors out of her hands and stab the s.h.i.+t out of her. She told her friend who was on the other end of the phone to call the police if she heard her scream. So I had to back off and keep my cool. Then she threatened to have me locked up if I hit her again and to leave the keys to the apartment on the table and to get the f.u.c.k out. So I walked out with only the clothes on my back. I left everything. Even though we lived together in the apartment, I knew she would fight me for everything. The TV, the computer, the furniture, everything, so I decided it was better to leave it all. So, I left empty-handed. I called my parents, told them what happened and moved back home with them that same night. I changed my phone number, closed out our joint bank account, changed my job and went on with my life."

"At the time, I didn't know that she was pregnant, and to tell you the truth, I don't think she knew either. Anyway, one day my man Ali ran into one of her friends at some party almost six months later and told him that Renee had had a baby boy and that the baby was mine! That's right after I met you," Kavon said. I sat in the chair stunned! Instead of baby mama drama, I had gotten involved with a man with four baby mama's going on at the same time!

I couldn't utter a word; I was numb, speechless, and just exhausted after that story, I had to regroup. All I could do was to shake my head. I walked into the little kitchenette area and grabbed a bottle of cold water, four aspirins and then lit a cigarette. I turned around and shouted, "Four Baby Mama's! What were you thinking about? What was I thinking about?" I yelled. I walked into the bedroom and lay across the bed. I could feel a headache coming on, and I was trying to ward it off before my head exploded. I curled up in a ball and started to drift off to sleep.

When I woke up the next morning Kavon was sitting silently in a chair at the foot of the bed looking at me. He stood up and walked over to me and said, "Good morning, Shortie, I'm sorry to put all of that on you last night, but it was eating me up. I couldn't keep that from you any longer." He said softly, "I wouldn't blame you if you didn't want to see me again." "Well, to tell you the truth, Kavon," I said, "I don't know what to say. I hate being lied to no matter what the reason is. I prefer that some one tell me the truth and let me decide what I want to do about the situation. To be manipulated and disrespected for you're selfish, and personal convenience doesn't sit well with me. And then, to top it off, four, I repeat four different women! Did you ever hear of birth control? Did you ever hear of condoms? Did you ever hear of AIDS? I know women play that game of I'm-on-the-pill. But d.a.m.n! With AIDS being prevalent among blacks, as well as all the other diseases that you can contract for life, you really are playing Russian roulette with your life and all the girls you sleep around with!"

"Thank G.o.d I insist on condoms for s.e.xual intercourse as well as oral s.e.x, and for the life of me I don't know why everyone doesn't think the way I do. But, it's your life. I thought you were smarter than that, Kavon," I said sadly. "Babe," Kavon replied, "I got it under control now, honest. I got tested just before I met you, and my test was negative. Look, I'm sorry. I never meant to lie to you, and I didn't mean to hurt you," he whispered. Angrily, I replied back, "You didn't hurt me, you hurt yourself and all the girls you f.u.c.ked." "Look, I love my kids. Whether I have two, three, or four kids, I'm going to be responsible for all of them. So, if you want out, I'll understand. No matter what you decide, I'll always be there for you. I'll go to the ends of the world for you if I have to; and don't you forget it. I know that I f.u.c.ked up big time, and I'm sorry. But then when I met you, I changed. I wish I had met you along time ago," he said with tears in his eyes. s.h.i.+t, s.h.i.+t, I I heard heard that that before, before, I said to myself, as I turned around in disgusted. I said to myself, as I turned around in disgusted.

Here I was in the Bahamas to get away from stress. But no, now I was here in the middle of some bulls.h.i.+t and drama. Look, Kavon I don't have anything to say. Unfortunately, there are no available rooms in the hotel for you to move into and neither one of us have extra cash like that. So I guess for now you'll have to make your bed on the terrace or on a chair, but you're not sleeping with me. All I want to do right now is to chill and enjoy myself as best I can at this point. So right now, I don't want to think or talk about what you said to me last night or this conversation right now. Then I got up and called room service and ordered breakfast then jumped in the shower.

When the food arrived, I was strapping on my sandals and ready to walk out of the bathroom. Kavon knocked on the door and yelled, "Shortie, the food is here!" I swung the door open and walked out wearing a white two-piece bathing suit under a cute little short set. I walked over to the breakfast tray and poured myself a cup of coffee while I eyed the a.s.sorted pastries and fruit. I decided to skip the pastries and piled the fruit on my plate as I reached for the phone to call Sean and Monica. Sean answered on the third ring and told me that everything was okay and to have fun. I didn't mention Kavon to him or our conversation and hung up. The rest of the trip Kavon went out of his way to make up for his indiscretions. But it didn't matter, our fling was over.

Just think of it like this, it was only day two of my vacation! Before I could even get out of New York it was stressed and now it's f.u.c.ked up beyond imagination! From that point I was cordial to Kavon, but beyond that, nothing. At night I would curl up in the bed, and Kavon would find his own spot. It was either the lounge chair on the terrace, the chair in the bedroom, or on the floor at the foot of the bed. In the morning we would get up, order breakfast then hit the beach or hit the pool. Then I would get my daily message, then lunch. Kavon decided to keep his distance but stayed close and eagerly paid for my daily expenses. I guess he didn't want to pressure me and kept the conversation light when we did speak to one another. It was a long seven days, but I survived. I had no choice but to survive this nasty and despicable situation, I had no where to run.

The night before our flight home we ended up at the Casino and gambled the night away. We cashed in our chips about 4:00 AM, grabbed our bags then headed for the airport. Our flight home Sunday morning at 6:45 AM couldn't come fast enough. But before I knew it the pilot made an announcement over the public address system that we were about to land and to buckle up. When the plane pulled up to the terminal and came to a full stop we jumped, grabbed our bags from the overhead compartment, and made my way through the crowd. We made our way through the maze of people to the curbside and waited almost fifteen minutes for a cab. I was anxious to get away from Kavon and anxious to get home to give Hobbs a big hug.

We found ourselves right in the middle of the morning rush hour and the cabbie maneuvered through traffic at a snails pace. Almost two hours later, we were pulling up in front of my house. I hopped out of the cab and rushed to the front door. I had held my bladder long enough and made a beeline for the bathroom. In the meantime, Kavon grabbed all the bags from the trunk and paid the cabbie. He placed his bags inside my foyer then brought my two bags up to my bedroom and placed them at the foot of the bed then went back downstairs.

I walked out of the bathroom and walked into my bed room and pulled out the dirty clothes from my suitcase. I gathered them together and proceeded down the stairs. I stopped before I reached the bottom step when I noticed Kavon's bags sitting by the door in the foyer. I slowly entered the kitchen and observed Kavon standing on my back porch playing with Hobbs. I turned away and continued down to the bas.e.m.e.nt to the laundry room. I sorted the whites from the dark then put a tub of clothes on to wash. I slowly walked back up the stairs as Kavon and Hobbs came into the house. He stood before me with his hands in his pocket and asked, "Shortie, did you make any kind of a decision?" I stopped dead in my tracks. "Did I make a decision about what? You've got to be kidding! This whole you and I thing doesn't require any thought! There's nothing I have to think about, let alone rethink. We don't have a future. You lied to me, and that's all I have to say. Besides, I know that I couldn't and wouldn't put up with the bulls.h.i.+t when the kids mom(s) find out about me," I said sternly. I made that mistake one time before with a man with a ready made family and it didn't workout. So, I know this isn't any different.

He stepped back and looked me in the eyes then asked me to call him a cab. He knew that he had pushed me to my limit and dare not ask me to drive him home. As I reached for the juice in the refrigerator, he walked up behind me and turned me around to face him. "Haley, whatever you decide, I'll have to live with. But I just want you to know that if we can work it out, I'll never lie to you again." "You must be out of your f.u.c.king mind!" I yelled. "You lied to me. That's one thing that I can't forget, and it seemed so easy for you to do." Just then his cab pulled up and honked for him to come out. I turned around, looked him in the eyes and motioned for him to get his things and leave. He walked to the door and briefly looked at me then walked out, and I closed the door behind him. I made myself a drink then went back to finish my laundry. After everything was washed, dried and folded Hobbs and I returned upstairs, ate a light snack and ploped down on the couch to watch some TV together.

I was mentally drained and must have dozed off, because the next thing I knew, Hobbs was up and barking at the front door. I slowly pulled myself to my feet as my door opened. It was Nia and Toni welcoming me home from my trip holding up with a bottle of wine as they walked through the door. "Hey girl, we want to know how your trip to the Bahamas was with Kavon! So what's the 4-1-1? I want to know all the details." Toni laughed as she walked into the living room. Nia pushed past me and greeted Hobbs with a bag of his favorite snacks and plopped down on the couch. "Okay, no holding back, give up the 4-1-1 on Mr. Kavon," Nia and Toni said in unison. "There's nothing for me to tell," I said. It was my time of the month, and I had terrible cramps the entire time so I laid low. I was so overwhelmed by Kavon's lies, I couldn't talk about it. They looked at each other then shrugged their shoulders then walked into the kitchen to get gla.s.ses and a bowl for the chips. My friends know me well enough to know that really wasn't the deal and let my excuse slide for the time being. Just then the phone rang. "Toni, would you please answer the phone for me," as I shut the door to the bathroom. "It's Sean and Monica on the phone," Toni yelled. "They said welcome home, and they want to know the details!" I yelled back, "Maybe tomorrow, I'm tired and have an early day tomorrow." "Besides these cramps are kicking my a.s.s," I said. Nia and Toni looked at each other and poured the wine. "If you're not willing to talk about it now, that's okay, but just unwind with this gla.s.s of wine first, and we'll get out of your way." I looked at both of them smiled and sat down with them. Three gla.s.ses later, I was fast asleep on the couch and Nia and Toni let themselves out.

When I woke up the next morning, I was still on the couch and Hobbs poking at me to let him out. I was in no mood to go to work or be sociable so I called into work for an extra vacation day. I walked upstairs, took the phone off the hook, and crawled into bed. There I slept the rest of the day and half the night. When I woke up, it was almost midnight. I reached for the phone and saw that I had ten messages. Kavon called four times and the rest of the calls were from my dad, Sean, Nia, and my coworker Lorraine.

Lorraine and I met the first day I started working for the senator. She's single, in her early thirties, about five feet and nine inches with a vibrant and charismatic personality. She's also a single mom with a five-year-old. She's what you might say my second pair of eyes and ears and the only one that I confide in at work. She's also a night owl and I decided to give her a call. "Hey girl, I'm home, are you busy?" I asked. "Hey, your back already?" she said, surprised! So, how was your romantic vacation with that gorgeous man of yours? Do I hear wedding bells in the distant future? Are you in love, what's up?" she exclaimed. "Girl, get a cigarette, pour you a drink, and sit down," I said. "Nooooo," she said.

After explaining the story in detail to Lorraine all she could say was. "You lying girl, you're lying!" I think that this was one time that she truly didn't know what to say. She knew Kavon's baby-mama drama knocked the wind outta me. "Girl, I'm there for you, if you need to talk I'm all ears." After a moment of silence I told her that I had to finish my hair and that I would see her at work in the morning. She agreed then hung up. I showered, pulled out a black dress, and changed the contents of my Louis Vuitton tote to my black Coach and got a jump on my morning rush. Then I jumped into bed and softly drifted off to sleep. My alarm clock went off promptly at eight o' clock. I slowly got up remembering that my boss wouldn't be in till around 2:00 PM. I had plenty of time for a work out at the gym before work. Ugh, this s.h.i.+t is kicking my a.s.s, but its well worth it. 11 o'clock sharp I was walking out of the gym and headed home for a quick shower and to change for work. d.a.m.n, my day was long and by 10:00 PM. I was exhausted beyond imagination and ready to go home. I dropped the senator off at his residence and made my way to the parkway. Halfway home, I received a call from Sean. He told me that he had spent the entire day in court fighting with his ex-wife over custody of their two kids. "So, things didn't go well in court again?" I asked. "No, they didn't, not at all," he replied. "Can you believe that the courts awarded her $2,800.00 a month in support from me? How in the h.e.l.l am I gonna survive? How am I going to live?" he yelled. "They left me with virtually nothing in my pockets! I'm going to have to find a second job off the books so I can keep a roof over my head!" he said sadly. "Hey, I'm sorry to hear that, if there's anything I can do, just let me know. In fact, I have a few dollars to tie you over if you need it." "Look, we're friends, and I've got your back," I said, and then hung up. I said a silent prayer and took my time driving home.

As soon as I got into the house, I let Hobbs out and ran upstairs to run myself a hot bubble bath. I checked my answering machine then returned downstairs to let in my baby and fixed a cosmopolitan to enjoy while I took my bath. I slipped off my dress and stood naked admiring my body in the mirror. My workouts in the gym were paying off. My flabby b.u.t.t and thighs were diminis.h.i.+ng and a tight and muscular transformation was in the making. I turned on some soft music, lit a few candles and stepped into a tub of bubbles. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the moment. "Between the Sheets" by the Isley Brothers was playing softly and almost brought a tear to my eye. "d.a.m.n," I said out loud. I would love to have that song playing and be in the arms of Jordan or my mystery man.

I stepped out of the tub, dried off and climbed into bed. Then I said my nightly prayers while holding my favorite pillow. I prayed for my family and friends and near the end of my prayers. I prayed that my chocolate man was safe and to let us one day meet again and if we didn't. I thanked the almighty for that little burst of hope in finding someone to light my spark again. Then I fell into a sound sleep.

Hobbs woke me up around 6 AM. He had either heard another dog barking, or he saw a squirrel through the window, because he wouldn't leave me alone until I let him out. "d.a.m.n, it's too early for me to get up," I said while wiping the sleep from the corner of my eyes. I wasn't due in early today. The senator's first appointment was a luncheon at 1 PM and a dinner engagement was scheduled for 7:30 PM. So my morning was free. I made a cup of coffee and went back upstairs and washed my face and brushed my teeth. While looking in the mirror, I decided that my hair needed a touch up and decided to call my beautician. I knew Pat was in the shop early on Tuesdays, so I showered and was at her shop when she arrived. Pat took one look at me and said, "Girl, you're black as h.e.l.l, what island were you at and what the h.e.l.l happened to your hair? You need a touch-up like yesterday," and laughed. "I know you want to adopt me as your dependant, she said and laughed again. "I was in the Bahamas, and the water is what happened to my hair," I said. "And as far as having you as a dependant, no thanks, but I will take a man as one, maybe," and laughed again. Pat permed, washed, and rolled my hair in record time as we watched the morning news and talk shows.

I was sitting under the dryer watching TV when a commercial aired about the Bahamas, and I immediately thought of Kavon. I remembered the few times that I was around him and his two kids; he seemed to be a great dad. He was patient, loving, understanding, and playful. Most of all he seemed to be a good example of what a father should be, at least on the surface. His practice of unprotected s.e.x in addition to his seemingly noncommittal relations.h.i.+ps just turned me off. Oh Oh well, well, it's it's over over now, now, I thought to myself. The hair dryer was on full blast and it was making me sleepy. I thought to myself. The hair dryer was on full blast and it was making me sleepy.

Before I knew it I had drifted off to sleep and was dreaming of when I was married to Errol. I met Errol about eight years ago at a political event. He was a personal bodyguard of a prominent congressman, who will remain anonymous. Errol was a divorcee and had custody of his two kids. He worked in the same building as I but on a different floor. At work when we ran into each other, we were professional and kept our relations.h.i.+p on the down low. I preferred it better that way, and didn't want to be in the office limelight of gossip. So we kept it all business while at work and let my hair down when I was off. It seemed like the perfect relations.h.i.+p. We liked and disliked almost the same things. We had similar quirks and wanted the same things out of life, so it seemed. I thought we were compatible and maybe we were the perfect match, but boy was I wrong!

After two weeks of dating, I met his family, his parents, his siblings and then his twins, Denise and Kirk. After four months of dating, he asked me for my hand in marriage and insisted that the wedding take place within two months. Without really thinking about what I was getting into. I said yes. I knew that I didn't love him like a woman should love a man that she was about to marry, but I felt I would grow to love him. Wrong! I should have followed my mind and said no, but I didn't. But since this looked like my only offer of marriage and kids I said yes. I know now that this was a poor excuse, to get married but this seemed like the right decision at the time.

I knew that Hobbs and I were set in our ways, but I was willing to make a change in our lifestyle and prayed that things would work out. Errol's finances were tight so instead of having our wedding in a catering hall we made plans for an intimate wedding in the backyard. With no time to spare I went full steam ahead with the wedding, the white dress, the invitations and all. Ugh, never again! A month before the wedding, Errol insisted that he and his two kids move in with me. That meant, we had to move fast! He gave his landlord a month notice that he was getting married and packed up. Errol and I moved all of my things out of my guest room and office and converted them into bedrooms for the kids. Next we rearranged everything in my bas.e.m.e.nt to accommodate his living room furniture and placed my office stuff in the corner opposite his office stuff. We had two additional phone lines installed and a bamboo room divider to separate our s.p.a.ce. The more stuff he moved in, the more uneasy I got. I began to feel as if I was suffocating, but quickly dismissed the thought and chalked it us as pre-wedding-jitters.

I should have followed my mind and called off the wedding when my wedding day turned into a near disaster. A week after Errol asked me to marry him I had hired a seamstress to design and make my wedding dress. I didn't have time or money for anything elaborate, so I opted for a simple yet elegant dress. Well, as fate would have it, the seamstress got sick and was unable to complete my dress on time. Well, believe it or not, the morning of my wedding, I still had no dress! I was walking around the house in my bathrobe and panties and everyone was running late! The caterer arrived an hour late and was rus.h.i.+ng around. My bridesmaid and the bakery company were two hours late and nothing seemed to be going right.

Last but not least, when my maid of honor arrived at my house with my dress an hour before the ceremony I was watching a movie on TV. Meanwhile, Errol was in the backyard drinking the champagne out of the bottle with his groomsmen while I watched them from my bedroom window. I was mortified! I was a wreck!

Now, if that wasn't an omen.... I should have followed my mind. I should have stopped the wedding before it started and turned my wedding day into "I'm sorry, I'm not getting married and going down like that party. But, I wanted to get married; unfortunately it was for the wrong reasons. So, against my better judgment, I walked down the isle and said I do anyway."

d.a.m.n, I was not only going to be a bride and a wife, I was also going to turn into an instant mother all in the same day! I thought to myself. Who would have thought!

I remember the first couple of weeks that we lived together. It was kinda fun. Then around month three reality set in. One morning I went to take a shower and when I came out of the bathroom I found the kids rummaging through my night table and dresser draws. I asked. Denise and Kirk why are you in my room and what are you looking for. Denise rolled her eyes at me then said. This is our dad's room and we're looking for his calculator. Mean while Kirk was looking at me like he was annoyed at the question. I informed Errol of the incident and was shocked when he ignored my complaint and never said anything to the kids. The next incident happened the week the kids returned to school after the Thanksgiving. Denise was caught stealing from one of her cla.s.smates and suspended from school. During her week's suspension from school, she had boys in and out of the house without our permission. She was constantly rummaging through my jewelry box and helping herself to my stuff and not returning it. Then I found out that his son Kirk was fighting in school and also suspended the same time that his sister was. At the same time I discovered that Kirk was stealing money out of my pocketbook.

Last but not least was when Errol began sneaking money out of our joint bank account. One night while attempting to balance the check book I discovered several discrepancies. I would deposit our paychecks into a joint account, which was setup solely for our household bills. Then, without my knowledge Errol would go to the ATM and make withdrawals when ever he needed money! Then out of the clear blue sky, he started running up his Master Card account on all kinds of expensive stereo equipment.

Then when the bills started coming; Errol started making all kinds of excuses as to why he couldn't pay the bills when they came it. Then the collection calls and delinquent notices started, I was going crazy! The life that I once knew was no longer peaceful; it had become everything I loath. It had become hectic, stressful, and I was soon surrounded by lies and deceit.

The straw that broke the camel's back was the day I found out my husband (of eight months) was cheating on me! s.h.i.+t, he didn't waste anytime did he! That b.a.s.t.a.r.d b.a.s.t.a.r.d! I had taken my car to the dealers for a tune up and to get a couple of things checked out and was able to talk the service manager into letting me have a loaner car for the day. I had a little running around to do but decided since the kids were at the movies, Hobbs was at the groomers and Errol was probable bowling that I'd go home and nurse my headache. I parked the loaner car in front of the house, walked inside poured a gla.s.s of juice, and went directly to my room. I fumbled around a few minutes looking for aspirins in my night table. I took two pills then jumped into bed fully dressed. I pulled the covers over my head to s.h.i.+eld the light from my eyes and got comfortable. My headache was so intense the slightest noise was magnified. About fifteen minutes later as the pain started to subside, and I heard Errol's car pull into the driveway. I heard him open the back door and walk through the kitchen to the closet in the foyer and open the closet door.

I pressed my index fingers against my temples to help ease the pain and started to call out to him just as his cell phone rang. He was on his way up the stairs and talking on the phone louder than usual. I overheard him say, "You have to cover for me; I told Haley that we hung out together last night. s.h.i.+t man, I took that girl Ryan out for a little dinner. Then we went back to her house, and I f.u.c.ked the s.h.i.+t outta her. d.a.m.n, she got a tight p.u.s.s.y for a big girl! s.h.i.+t, I hit that so hard, the rubber broke; I was tearing that a.s.s up and just couldn't pull out in time. I'll tell you one thing, she's a keeper!"

I couldn't believe what I was hearing, what the h.e.l.l! Well, I sat straight up in the bed and getting up when he opened the bedroom door. He swung the door open, looked me straight in the eyes, and dropped the phone. He was stunned and stood there motionless for a second; then reached down without taking his eyes off me, picked up his phone and hung up it up I was furious and my head was about to explode. Immediately Errol started to back peddle and get defensive. "Where's your car? Why are you home?" he asked. I pushed past him and walked down the stairs and grabbed my keys. He followed me down the stairs and out the door to the loaner car. He grabbed my arm and swung me around. "Whose f.u.c.king car is this?" he yelled. "It's the dealers!" I yelled back.

I got into the car and started to put the key in the ignition, but Errol grabbed the keys from my hand. "Where the f.u.c.k are you going?" he yelled. I yelled back, "Leave me alone! I heard every world you said while you were on the phone! You were out last night f.u.c.king some b.i.t.c.h! I'm getting away from your a.s.s." I guess he had gotten so mad with himself for shooting off his mouth; he punched the car window causing the gla.s.s to shatter in my face. There was gla.s.s everywhere! I was so shaken up, that it took me a few seconds to realize that I had gla.s.s shards in my eyes! As I tried to blink my eyes, I could feel the razor sharp edges of the gla.s.s cut into my eyes, and I started to cry. I reached up to look at my face in the rear view mirror and saw that my face was covered in blood.

"Errol opened the car door!" and pulled me from behind the wheel. "Baby, I'm so sorry. I didn't think I hit the window that hard. Let me get you in the house and clean you up," he frantically stated. I was temporarily blinded by the gla.s.s and blood and had no other choice, but to let him escort me into the house. We walked inside and went straight to the kitchen sink to rinse my face and hair. The water felt like someone was pouring acid over my face and scratching my eyes with a sewing needle. Errol grabbed a paper towel and reached up to dry my face. I pulled back and fought to focus my eyes on him. "No, don't f.u.c.king touch me, just take me to the hospital, I have gla.s.s in my eyes!" I yelled. Errol held out his hand to guide me to the door and out to the car. All while begged me to forgive him.

I had to keep calm and think fast. I knew that if I told the emergency room personnel at the hospital what really happened to my face, they'd call the police. Errol would possible be arrested, lose his job, and would stalk me the rest of my life. Along with the fact, I'd be home with his kids! Or I had to think fast and make up a believable story as to how I got the gla.s.s in my eyes and get rid of his a.s.s when I recovered from my injuries. Well, I went with the latter.

It was apparent that Errol was thinking the same thing because he asked me what I was going to tell them when we got to the emergency room. But I refused to answer him and tried to think of a convincing story. As soon as we walked in, I was ushered into the trauma section and given a gown. A nurse walked over to me and helped me undress then started cleaning my wounds while Errol was giving the clerk at the front desk my personal information and his insurance card. Soon an emergency room doctor walked in to my cubicle to examine my eyes. He quickly evaluated my injuries then called for an eye specialist. "Honey, what happen to you? Do you want us to call the police?" the nurse whispered in my ear in a calm voice. I held back my tears and took a deep breath and then calmly told them a pretty convincing story. It must have been a pretty good one because nothing else was said, and the police never showed up.

About ten minutes later, I was examined by two ophthalmologists who stated that I had gla.s.s fragments embedded in my left eye and that both of my corneas were scratched. "Will I have any long-term eye damage? Will I recover?" I asked. Just then Errol popped through the curtain and introduced himself to the doctors. "Uh, doctor, this is my wife. Is she going to be okay?" The doctors stated that they could remove the shards of gla.s.s from my left eye with minor surgery and a.s.sured both of us with rest and medication I would have a full recovery. One doctor then administered a local anesthetic into my eyes while the nurse finalized the paper work and prepared me for surgery to remove the remaining debris. Two hours later I was patched up like the mummy and rolled out of the recovery room in a wheelchair. The operation went well the doctor bragged to my husband. In fact we're going to discharge your wife. As Errol walked out the door to bring the car up to the side door, the nurse bent over and whispered in my ear. "If there's any discomfort with your eyes, don't hesitate to call us," and handed me my discharge papers. Errol and the nurse helped me into the car then handed Errol my prescription for painkillers. We drove straight to the pharmacy in silence and then home. Errol was scared to death and overly nice to me and apologize numerous times, but all I wanted to do was get into my bed and sleep. I would figure out the rest later.

When I woke up, I was so disorientated because my eyes were bandaged shut; I didn't know if it was day or night. So I sat up in the bed and felt around for the TV remote so I could find out what time it was. Just then I heard footsteps coming up the stairs and sat there motionless. The door opened and Errol walked in and put something on the nightstand. "Baby, I made you something to eat, and sat down beside me." "No thanks, I was just getting up to use the bathroom." My stomach is a little queasy. I lied about not being hungry, but I had no intentions of eating or drinking anything that he served me after the bulls.h.i.+t I had just gone through. He helped me to the bathroom and waited for me outside the bathroom, then helped me back to bed.

He sat down next to me and insisted on talking, he wanted to say his piece. I sat quietly listening until he finished talking and decided to keep my comments to myself. At this point the only thing I could do was to rid my life from this miscreant from h.e.l.l and to get his despicable a.s.s the h.e.l.l out of my life for ever. My eyes had to stay bandaged for a week, and I was scared to death and truly helpless. Sean and Monica had gone away on vacation. Toni had flown to Ohio on business. Dawn was attending a seminar in Atlanta, and Nia was on a photo shoot in Italy. So, I was on my own. The next day, I fumbled around with the phone until I was able to master calling. I called my boss and told him about the accident, leaving out the gory details. He a.s.sured me that he would pull another staff member from the office to fill in for me until I was able to come back to work then wished me well. Then he hurried off the phone to answer another call.

My next call was to my bank branch manager Tara. I had to wait almost five minutes before she picked up her line. I asked her to temporarily suspend all tractions on my joint account while I was recovering. My last and final call of the day was to my lawyer's office. I scheduled a consultation for the following week. My mind was made up, and there was nothing on this earth that was going to change my mind. It was a long and grueling week, but I made it through it. I got my neighbor next door to come in and feed Hobbs for me in addition to sneak me something to eat too. Errol was doing everything he could to make me comfortable and make amends for his f.u.c.k up. His kids tiptoed around the house and acted like perfect angles. That following Tuesday, I got up after Errol and the kids left for school and work and got myself ready for my day. I had a ten-thirty appointment with the ophthalmologist and was hoping to have not only the bandages removed but thumbs up on my vision. My neighbor drove me to my appointment and helped me to his office. Go, I'll be fine, you're going to be late for work I insist. I said. She held my hand tight and then gave me a hug then rushed out the door.

Dr. Carter removed the bandages with care then dimmed the lights. His examination was thorough and fast. When he finished he a.s.sured me that my eyes had not suffered any permanent damage then wrote me a prescription. He instructed me to wear dark sun gla.s.ses for a while so the wind and dust wouldn't further aggravate my eyes sensitivity and scheduled me for a follow up appointment the following week.

I paid my co-pay deductible at the front desk then asked the clerk to call me a cab. I slipped on my darkest designer sungla.s.ses and walked out the office. A few minutes later, the cab showed up and whisked me to Brooklyn to my lawyer's office, Wilson and Glenmore, LLP. I needed to get my life back and this was the only way.

The consultation took no longer than twenty minutes. I walked into his office literally with my checkbook in hand. I didn't hesitate nor did I give a d.a.m.n as to how much it was going to cost; I wanted out. So right then and there, the preliminary papers were drawn up and I signed them on the spot. As a precaution, I called my dog's breeder and asked her to keep Hobbs for a couple of weeks. I explained my situation and didn't want Hobbs to be a victim of foul play. She agreed and as soon as I got back to Long Island, I packed Hobbie's crate, his toys, and food bowls and took him to the breeder.

I must have looked like I was under duress because the next thing I knew, Pat was leaning over me, shaking my shoulder. Inadvertently, I must have fallen asleep while under the dryer and dreamed about my ex-husband and his kids. Pat shook my shoulder again and kept asking me if I was okay with a concerned look on her face. It took me a moment to get my bearings and realize where I was. d.a.m.n, I had fallen asleep under that dryer and was reminiscing about my nightmare of a husband. I wiped the sweat from my face and adjusted my s.h.i.+rt; I was soaking wet from sweating. I lifted the overhead bonnet dryer from my head and shakily stood up, pulled out my rollers then placed a $100.00 bill on the counter, and walked out of the salon. I was suffocating and needed air; I was nauseous, light-headed almost disorientated. I had to get it together and get ready for work.

That was an ugly time in my life that I would only wish on my worst enemies. It was the only time in my life that I felt like I was looking up at the gutter. I was emotionally stressed, and I couldn't get a hold on my emotions. But thanks to prayers and the support of my family and friends; I got through it. After three months my divorce was finalized and Errol and his kids were out of my life and I was back to being single again.

I slowly got into my car and carefully drove home. As I walked through my front door, I could hear my phone ringing. It was my coworker April. "Hey Haley, are you coming in today?" she asked. "Yes," I answered. I just walked in from the hair salon and will be leaving here within the hour. "Why? What do you need?" I asked. "Well, when you get in the office, if you have time, stop by my office, I have a favor to ask of you," April said. I agreed then hung up the phone and ran upstairs to get ready for work.

I walked into the office an hour ahead of schedule, dropped my coat and bag in my office then walked into April's office. "Hey April, I'm here what's up, girl?" I asked. She looked up from her desk with a smile and motioned for me to have a seat on the couch. "I'm having a small intimate dinner party this Friday night, and I'd like for you to come."

"April, I'm not sure, I don't have a date to bring. "That's exactly why I'm inviting you over Friday night, " April stated. "I have a house guest this week, and Darrell and I would like for you to meet him. He's Darrell's cousin Virgil from Colorado, and he looks like the type of guy you'd be interested in. He's single, has no kids, and he's looking to relocate to the city. So, please say yes and come over this Friday," April said. "If it will make you more at ease, I invited two other people, so you won't feel pressured like it's a blind date or something. I promise there's no strings attached. Just come over and have dinner, play some cards with us, swim in the pool, and have some fun for a change, d.a.m.n girl, April pleaded.

"Oh I don't know, April. Tell me a little something about him, I asked. "Well, his name is Virgil Leighton. He's medium complexion, about six feet tall and about 180 pounds, and he'd really nice-looking," April replied. "Hum, I don't know, you may have to count me out," I said. "Oh come on girl, do this for me, please," April asked. "All of my other friends are either hooked up with someone or married. You're the only friend I have that's not dating someone." "Let me think on it, and I'll get back to you," I said reluctantly. "Look, I have a half hour before I pick up the senator. I have a briefing at City Hall at 2 PM followed by a press conference. We should be back in the office around 5 PM; I'll let you know then okay," and then I walked out of her office and returned to mine. I was on my way to the senator's residence when the office called and informed me that the briefing and press conference had been canceled. So I continued north on the Harlem Drive to the 155 Street exit and looped back down town. I called April and agreed to attend her party on Friday night. She was so excited that I had accepted her invitation that she wanted to do a conference call to her house and introduce Virgil to me over the phone. That's where I drew the line. "Come on, girl, all you have to do is say h.e.l.lo!" she insisted. I acted as if I had a bad connection then hung up the phone. When I got back to the office, I gave her one of my famous dirty looks as I walked past her office. I walked into my office, closed the door and made a few calls. I finished up my odds and ends around 6 PM, locked up my office and headed home.

Just as I was getting off my exit on the Southern State Parkway, I remembered that this was the day Dawn had to appear in Family Court for her divorce case against her husband. I looped back on the parkway and got off at the next exit. When I pulled up in front of her house I noticed her kids were playing basketball in the driveway. "Hi, Haley!" they yelled. "We just have to warn you, mom is on the warpath, so be careful. She looks crazed and probably out for somebody's blood," they yelled. I acknowledged the warning and walked cautiously into the house anyway. "Hey, Dawn, where are you?" I asked. Dawn walked out of the bathroom with tears in her eyes. "Haley, that b.a.s.t.a.r.d never showed up in court today. I called his brother after they made me reschedule for another court date and he told me that Thomas flew to Santo Domingo last Wednesday with that b.i.t.c.h and wasn't coming back for at least six months! He flat out refuses to give me money for the house, the bills, or the kids. The mortgage is late again; in fact, I'm still two months behind! I can't do this on one paycheck, and I can't work a second job. I have to take care of the kids." she exclaimed. "Girl, I'm sorry. I don't know what to say," I said.

I suggested that I treat them to dinner so we called for take out and I hung out with Dawn and the kids for a couple of hours. We played a game of cards then watched TV. It was getting late and I had to go. "Look, Dawn, I'd love to stay longer but Hobbs is probably wondering what happen to me. If you need something, give me a call." The kids and I straightened up the coffee table in the living room while Dawn collected all the gla.s.ses and placed them in the dishwasher. I made a pit-stop in the bathroom and secretly wrote Dawn a check for $3,000 and placed it on her kitchen table on my way out the door. "Oh yeah, if you get a chance, give Monica a call. I think she might be able to locate your fugitive husband and then walked out the door."

d.a.m.n, I've got that headache again I said to myself as I drove down the street. When I arrived home Hobbs greeted me with his usual playfulness, boy was I glad to be home, I said to Hobbs. I poured a gla.s.s of juice and then went outside to play catch with Hobbs. After and hour of playing with him I was exhausted, and plopped down on the steps while Hobbs finished his dinner. There I sat, thinking about my friends that had or were going down the divorce road. For me, it was h.e.l.l. But thank G.o.d, it was only six months of h.e.l.l. After the incident with Errol breaking my car window and the gla.s.s shards getting into my eyes, he left quietly with his kids, and I haven't seen or spoken to them since. That was a painful and ugly time in my life. I had put it all behind me, hoping never to relive again. It was getting late so I decided to go in the house, and watch the news and chill out before going to bed.

It was the beginning of the week, and I was doing my usual Monday morning quarterback thing. I rescheduled meetings and ran interference when it was necessary. The rest of the week went fast, and before I knew it, it was Friday night. I was on my way to the ladies room when April called out to me from her office. "See you tonight around seventy-thirty right!" I took two steps backwards and looked over at her with a puzzled expression on my face. "What happens at seventy-thirty?" I asked. "I know, you didn't forget about my dinner party Haley, its tonight? You promised to come over and meet Darrell's cousin from Colorado tonight," April replied in annoyance. d.a.m.n, I had forgotten about meeting her house guest and didn't want her to get upset. I laughed unenthusiastically and told her that I was playing and that I would see her later. After freshening up in the ladies room I walked back to my office, locked my desk and headed to the elevator.

Traffic on the parkway wasn't bad, and the weather was hot and sticky. I threw in a hot CD and started driving to the music as I thought to myself; an an evening evening in in April's April's pool pool didn't didn't seem seem so so bad bad after after all all. I got home around six, fed Hobbs and ran upstairs to pull out my bathing suits. In the mean time, I made a couple of calls while deciding which one to wear. I decided on the black and white two-piece suit and slipped it on after a quick shower. I looked at myself in the mirror and smiled. My My workouts workouts are are really really paying paying off, off, and and I'm I'm proud proud of of my my transformation! transformation! I thought to myself. I grabbed my sarong out of the closet and tied it loosely around my waist, then headed out the door. The ride to April's house was uneventful and short; and within fifteen minutes I was there. When I arrived, I pulled into the driveway behind the other cars and walked towards the back yard. As I opened the side gate, Darrell was walking out of the house with a tray of steaks. "What's up, girl! Come on in," Darrell exclaimed. He placed the tray down beside the grill then came over to me and gave me a hug. "d.a.m.n girl, you look wonderful and I see that you're ready for a swim. You're the first one here so if you don't mind, help yourself to something to drink and get comfortable. There's champagne, beer and wine in the cooler and the hard stuff is on the bar. I'll be right back. April's in the house, he shouted. I'll tell her that you're here." I dropped my bag on the lounge chair, then walked over to the bar and poured myself a gla.s.s of champagne. "I hope you have enough food; I haven't eaten all day," I said jokingly. As soon as Darrell disappeared into the house a very nice looking man appeared and walked straight toward me. "Hi, you must be Haley," he said while holding out his hand. "Yes, I am, and you must be Darrell's cousin, Virgil." Just then April popped out of the house and stated that her other two guess weren't coming and that it would only be the four of us for dinner. "s.h.i.+t, I said to myself under my breath. But from the looks of Virgil, it might be for the best. I thought to myself. I grabbed my sarong out of the closet and tied it loosely around my waist, then headed out the door. The ride to April's house was uneventful and short; and within fifteen minutes I was there. When I arrived, I pulled into the driveway behind the other cars and walked towards the back yard. As I opened the side gate, Darrell was walking out of the house with a tray of steaks. "What's up, girl! Come on in," Darrell exclaimed. He placed the tray down beside the grill then came over to me and gave me a hug. "d.a.m.n girl, you look wonderful and I see that you're ready for a swim. You're the first one here so if you don't mind, help yourself to something to drink and get comfortable. There's champagne, beer and wine in the cooler and the hard stuff is on the bar. I'll be right back. April's in the house, he shouted. I'll tell her that you're here." I dropped my bag on the lounge chair, then walked over to the bar and poured myself a gla.s.s of champagne. "I hope you have enough food; I haven't eaten all day," I said jokingly. As soon as Darrell disappeared into the house a very nice looking man appeared and walked straight toward me. "Hi, you must be Haley," he said while holding out his hand. "Yes, I am, and you must be Darrell's cousin, Virgil." Just then April popped out of the house and stated that her other two guess weren't coming and that it would only be the four of us for dinner. "s.h.i.+t, I said to myself under my breath. But from the looks of Virgil, it might be for the best.

Darrell prepared the steaks while April, Virgil, and I brought the rest of the food outside and placed it on the table. After dinner, April insisted that Virgil and I get to know one another better and insisted that we should enjoy the pool or the hot tub while she and Darrell cleaned up. So I grabbed my bags and spruced myself up in the cabana while Virgil went inside to change into his swimming trunks. When he returned, I was already finis.h.i.+ng up my second lap. He seductively slipped off his t-s.h.i.+rt exposing more of his muscular physique and sipped the rest of his drink. I swam over to the shallow end of the pool so I could stand up and wiped the water from my face, so I could get a better look at his body. He walked over to the diving board and jumped in with the proficiency of a professional diver. Virgil swam over to me then stood up. "Nice dive," I stated. "I use to be on the swim team in college," he replied. We fooled around in the water a little while then decided to sit on the side of the pool. I found Virgil to be interesting and funny, and I really enjoyed his conversation. April and Darrell joined us a few minutes later and challenged us to a game of water volleyball. Virgil and I kicked April and Darrel's b.u.t.t, we won two out of three games we played. After the tie breaker Darrell suggested that the four of us relax in the hot tub and enjoy the dessert he had prepared.

Virgil made himself comfortable in the hot tub while I went to the ladies' room. When I returned, I noticed that Virgil was sitting in the tub sipping on a gla.s.s of champagne, and April was stacking wood in the outdoor fireplace. I walked over to the hot tub and slid my sarong down my hips while Virgil looked on. He smiled and nodded his head as if he was approving what he saw. I stepped into the steaming tub of hot bubbles and sighed with relief. Virgil moved closer and asked me to tell him more about myself in a seductive baritone voice. I laughed then gave him a brief bio. "Well, I'm thirty eight years old. I am divorced. I don't have any kids, and I'm doing okay for a single female." I didn't want to divulge too much. I'm never comfortable giving out personal information to people I just meet. Maybe if I felt some kind of chemistry I would have said more, but he was starting to get a little creepy. Virgil kept looking at me as if he was about to devour me. He kept licking his lips at me and grabbing his s.h.i.+t! So I quickly turned the same question back to Virgil. "So, what's your story?" "Well," he slowly stated, "I'm also thirty-eight years old, originally from Harlem and about twenty years ago; my family relocated to Colorado. After college, I had a few jobs here and there. Then about four years ago, I lucked up and landed my dream job with a lucrative sports firm. My boss is great, the clientele are sometimes, a little high strung, but all in all I have a great job. It allows me to work and socialize with the rich and famous. It keeps me on my toes and my game tight. You know what I mean?"

"Anyway, the company recently merged with another agency located in Manhattan and I put a bid in for a transfer. So, here I am, mixing business with pleasure," and smiled at me. "It's kind of bad timing though. The merger was announced the day after I closed on a three bedroom townhouse. He said." Then Virgil slid over closer to me in the hot tub and reached over and grabbed the half full bottle of champagne. He poured what was left in the bottle into our gla.s.ses and held his gla.s.s up to toast. After about three bottles of champagne between all of us, Virgil seemed to be a little tipsy and consumed with himself and his accomplishments. The conversation became all about him and that was okay until he started referring to women as b.i.t.c.hes and wh.o.r.es. When he started spewing out those words, I was ready to go. Virgil apologized for monopolizing the conversation with his stories, but not for the b.i.t.c.hes and wh.o.r.es comments. Maybe the look on my face told him that I wasn't impressed or interested, who knows.

Just then, April and Darrell walked out of the house and joined us in the hot tub as the music played softly in the background. I reluctantly agreed to stay another twenty minutes. Finally, I said, "Look, guys, I have an early day tomorrow. I'm sorry but I have to call it an evening."

The four of us walked to the gate talking and laughing. I hugged everyone and thanked them for a wonderful evening. I turned to Virgil and wished him luck on his interview and noticed April and Darrell trying to slip away. Virgil looked me in the eyes then said, "Look, I'm always flying back and forth to New York. So would it be a problem if we hook up sometime?" He reached in his pocket and pulled out a business card and wrote his cell and home numbers on the back. "Here, you have my numbers, you can call me anytime. I'm leaving in a few days and I'd like to meet you in the city one day for lunch or an early dinner." "I don't know what my weeks schedule looks like yet. As you know, as a personal a.s.sistant for the senator, I also have a demanding job. I go as much as you.

So if we're not able to meet up this time, maybe we can meet up on your next trip. For some reason I started to feel a little uncomfortable with his persistence. "I'll let you know how my weeks going." All of a sudden Virgil grabbed me around my waist and tried to kiss me. I put my hands up defensively and gently pushed away and said, "Virgil, I don't operate like that, don't get it twisted." I smiled, got into my car, and flew down the parkway. Halfway home, April called and asked what I thought of Virgil. "Thanks girl, but for my sixth sense is saying don't do it. Besides, I don't think he's my type. Even if he was, I don't want to date anyone right now." By the time we hung up, I was home. I walked into the house, let Hobbs in then went upstairs to rip off my bathing suit and take a hot shower and got ready for bed.

It seemed as soon as I closed my eyes my alarm clock was going off. d.a.m.n, d.a.m.n, it's it's six six o' o' clock clock already, already, I said to myself. I hit the snooze b.u.t.ton for another fifteen minutes and then dragged myself out of bed when it went off for the second time. I showered, dressed, had coffee and was on my way to work by 7:45. I hate coming to work on the weekends, but, that's how it is. I was right in the middle of an international call when April sashayed into my office. I whispered. "Have a seat April, I'll be with you in a second," and motioned for her to take a seat. Before I could put the phone in its cradle she was in my face. "Haley, you can't be for real about turning Virgil's offer down. Are you sure you don't want any of that? d.a.m.n, the brother's got money, he's fine, he's single, and he kept me up half the night asking questions about you!" April exclaimed. "Come on girl; don't hate me for trying to hook you up!" "Look girl, I'll admit, he is fine," I said, "but I'm not attracted to him. Sorry, there's no chemistry on my part. So, Ms. Cupid, please leave it alone," I begged. I said to myself. I hit the snooze b.u.t.ton for another fifteen minutes and then dragged myself out of bed when it went off for the second time. I showered, dressed, had coffee and was on my way to work by 7:45. I hate coming to work on the weekends, but, that's how it is. I was right in the middle of an international call when April sashayed into my office. I whispered. "Have a seat April, I'll be with you in a second," and motioned for her to take a seat. Before I could put the phone in its cradle she was in my face. "Haley, you can't be for real about turning Virgil's offer down. Are you sure you don't want any of that? d.a.m.n, the brother's got money, he's fine, he's single, and he kept me up half the night asking questions about you!" April exclaimed. "Come on girl; don't hate me for trying to hook you up!" "Look girl, I'll admit, he is fine," I said, "but I'm not attracted to him. Sorry, there's no chemistry on my part. So, Ms. Cupid, please leave it alone," I begged.

"Okay, I'll leave it alone, but only after this question. Why is it that you still have Jordan's picture on your desk? Look girl, I know it hurts but you have to stop acting as if Jordan might come back to you," April stated. "I don't want to seem cold and callous, but think about it, he's probably with his baby mama right now!" Then she stood up, turned around, and walked out of my office. After that comment, I walked to the door and closed it behind her. After her snippy statement, I had to sit down and regroup, but I cried instead. She She may may be be right right, I thought to myself. It hurts! Knowing that I was still in love with Jordan, and there was nothing I could do about it, was devastating. He had moved on with his life and I had to accept it.

Around 4 PM, the senator called for me to drive him to LaGuardia Airport. He was headed to Albany without me for the next three days which meant I had some time off to myself.

I finished work around seven-thirty and was looking forward to a quiet evening at home. As soon as I walked in the house Hobbs was all over me. I put him outside and turned on some music. Then I changed into something comfortable and whipped up an extra strong cosmopolitan. By then Hobbs was standing at the door waiting to come inside. I turned off my cell phone and plopped down on the couch and put my feet up on the coffee table. Around 11PM, my hang out and music producer buddy Ann called and talked me into going to the club the next morning with her. Yea, I did say the next morning. Some New York House music clubs are so avant-garde. When we entered the club around 9AM, we were greeted by the mystical sounds of tribal music. I needed to get rid of the tension from my body and sweat a little. We checked our bags and danced our way through the crowd to our usual spot on the floor. The music was booming and the atmosphere was awesome.

I was dancing my a.s.s off and just happen to look in the DJ booth and stopped dead in my tracks with my mouth wide open. There, standing next to the DJ stood a black Adonis. He had the face of a model and was fine as h.e.l.l! He appeared to be six feet or so, with a honey-almond completion and shoulder length dreads. His chest and biceps bulged through his t-s.h.i.+rt showing off the sculptured masterpiece. I stared at him so intensely that I almost tripped over my own two feet trying to get Ann's attention. I grabbed her by the arm and pointed to the DJ booth. "Look up, look up!" I shouted. She turned around towards the booth then turned back to me. "Oh s.h.i.+t! He's fine as h.e.l.l! I wonder who he is. d.a.m.n, look at him!" she exclaimed. We regained our composure and continued to dance with our partners. The DJ on the turntables was entranced in his zone, swaying and dancing to the music as he mixed in the spiritual sound of Odo oya. All of a sudden the crowd went wild, and began to dance frantically in a trancelike state. As I closed my eyes, I could feel the music sending a tingling sensation through my body until I clim