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He looked at me; his eyes were bloodshot from tears. His face held such deep sorrow and pain. He opened his mouth and closed it twice; he wasn't sure what to say. I wiped away his tears. His skin was hot, as if he had a fever, but lycanthropes always have a higher body temperature.
"I'm sorry for taking my anger out on you...," he said. He broke down again. This time he just fell over on to his side, into the fetal position. He wasn't ready to share his pain. I got as close as I could and comforted him. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry," he kept repeating.
His pain was so great, I found myself crying with him. He absently put his arms around my waist. I rubbed his hair and laid my face against his.
"It's okay," I whispered to him over and over.
He looked at me. We were only a couple inches apart. He looked at me as a man looks at a woman, l.u.s.t and want in those eyes now. I wasn't sure what to do. He'd switched gears on me; it wasn't fair. He put his hand on my cheek.
"Alex, this can't and won't go anywhere," I said in a low voice, almost a whisper.
Before the statement even reached, his brain or maybe he just didn't care -, he kissed me. At first, I kissed him back just to get it over with, but I didn't like being put in this situation. Then the kiss got rougher.
"Alex, stop," I said into his mouth.
I tried to push him away but I was a lot smaller than him. I was strong but nowhere close to his lycanthrope strength. His tongue slipped into my mouth and he tasted like mint. I bit his tongue, tasting blood, and he let go. I quickly backed away. I scuttled back on my hands and feet. His needs changed fast and I didn't want any part of it.
He got on his hands and knees. Apparently, he'd found a new release. Shame I was about to pop his bubble. I backed myself into the wall. d.a.m.n it, I didn't have any weapons. I knew I couldn't get to the chair fast enough.
"Come on, Logan, you want it. I can smell it," he said.
"I don't know what you smell, but I do not want you," I stated loudly.
I didn't want to sound the alarm. I could take care of this myself had to if I wanted Alex to respect me. He pulled on my legs and suddenly I was flat on my back. He straddled me and unb.u.t.toned my pants.
"Alex, don't make me do something you'll regret," I said, getting p.i.s.sed.
"You smell so good," he said and kissed me again.
His hand went to my breast. Oh, this was so over. f.u.c.k respect. "Paris!" I screamed.
The door flew open with a bang and a flare of suffocating heat. To my surprise, it was Ronan who pulled Alex off me.
"d.a.m.n it, Alex! What the h.e.l.l is wrong with you?" Ronan said in a p.i.s.sed off voice that echoed in the room.
Wow, I'd never heard Ronan swear before. He's always so proper and composed. Paris rushed to me, his eyes all ice-green and werefox eyes. This was getting out of control. Paris helped me to my feet.
"Alex, you crossed the line. This time I'll drop it," I said, feeling hurt but refusing to show it.
"I'm not sorry. You wanted it and you know it," he said, looking me up and down.
"I'm going to the bathroom. Ronan, we need to discuss Palmira when I get back. Try not to kill each other while I'm gone. Oh by the way, Alex, I owe you this." I walked up to him and slapped him across the face. "Don't ever do that again." I walked out of the room and across the hall, zipping and b.u.t.toning my pants.
Chapter 17.
I opened the door to the gold and white room, and looked at the wall where Katherine's and the others' portraits hung. Thankfully, someone had covered them again. I stood in the middle of the room, shaking. I would've rather have faced a rouge lycanthrope than have to go through that mess with Alex again.
I'd never been put in that situation before. I let out a shaky breath I hadn't noticed I was holding. I took a deep trembling breath and tears streamed down my cheeks. My knees refused to hold me. I went down. Thank the G.o.ds for carpet.
There was a knock at the door, but there was no way I was going to be able to say a word. The door slowly opened. I sat on my knees looking at the floor.
"Logan," Paris said.
"I'm fine," I said, not sounding convincing even to myself.
He walked over to me and squatted down. He was silent for the longest time, but his anger came off him like waves of heat. I sat there and the tears would not stop. He touched me and when I didn't flinch, he picked me up. He carried me to the bed, cradling me in his lap. His vanilla musk scent was so comforting. The warmth and the beat of his heart calmed me a little.
"I'm sorry that happened. I don't want you to be alone with Alex again," he said. He was p.i.s.sed, and I agreed. He wouldn't have to talk me into it.
"Don't tell anyone I broke down," I asked, wiping my eyes.
The door opened again and this time it was Ronan who entered. I had so many mixed emotions about him right now, I wasn't sure I could face him. I didn't know if it was the reincarnation of Katherine or not, but it was going to take a long time to get used to it. If I ever did.
"Logan, are you okay?" Ronan asked, moving to stand in front of Paris.
I looked up into his perfect violet eyes. They held anger and sorrow at the same time, just like Paris. If he was p.i.s.sed about Alex, he would have to take a number and the line formed behind me. I nodded, not trusting my voice.
"What the h.e.l.l is wrong with Alex?" Paris asked. The question held heat. It spread from him and enveloped me.
"I fear the Dagda has it bad for Logan," Ronan sighed. "Right now Rafe is speaking with him. I hope he outgrows this obsession he has for Logan."
Something told me this wasn't over, and it wasn't going to be so easy. I was so tired. I listened to Paris' heartbeat for the longest time and closed my eyes. I had to sleep, if only for a couple of minutes...
I stood in the warehouse. I felt Blaze and followed the pull of his power, his magick that matched my own. It was weak, but it was there just the same. I went back down the corridor, which in my opinion I'd been down too many times.
I heard someone coming and hugged the wall, although I didn't think I could be seen. White Hair walked past me. He slowed, then stopped and turned. Interesting: he could sense me. He took a couple of steps back and stood right in front of me. He looked around and stared into my eyes for a couple of seconds, then shrugged and finally walked away. It always amazed me how many people showed any type power. Sensing was the most common ability.
I continued down the corridor, following the pull of my brother's magick. He wasn't held in the same room as I'd been. Blaze was further down the hall and on the opposite side.
I walked through the door. A single high watt bulb lit the room, hanging over Blaze's head. His head was down; the red welts on his chest were dark and looked painful. I stopped right next to him. I laid my hands on his shoulder. He looked up, his eyes met mine, and I knew he could see me. I had no doubt of that. But, I couldn't talk to him. I was basically there in spirit only, literally.
I heard a sudden commotion from the corridor and whatever it was, it was coming this way.
I stood behind Blaze with my hands on his shoulders. Some of the tension went out of his body. I could tell he felt safer, even if I was only projecting myself there. The door flung open and Palmira, White Hair and several werefoxes flooded into the room.
They spread out as if they were being attacked. Palmira came towards me, I knew she couldn't see me or physically touched me, but she could still sense me, as White Hair had.
"Little one, you cannot hide from me. The power level in this room has doubled. I can taste it like a fine wine," she said, almost drunk from mine and Blaze's combined magick.
She walked towards us and when she stopped, her legs were touching Blaze. I wanted to smack her or push her away. Before I knew what was happening, she placed her hand on Blaze's chest.
I woke up screaming, making Paris jump and almost dump me on the floor. I opened my eyes to see Ronan still in front of me.
"Are you okay?" Paris asked.
People seemed to be asking me that question a lot lately. "I'm fine. But, I saw Blaze. Palmira is going to kill him if she keeps feeding on him. Pretty soon she'll start on his life energy," I said, getting to my feet. "Ronan, we need to talk. Paris, will you find me something light to eat?"
"Sure," Paris answered. He got up and went to do as I asked. He paused at the door and looked at me.
"I'm fine," I said with a smile that went all the way to my eyes. That tended to happen when I looked at Paris. In spite of that, I was more worried now than before.
He took me at my word and left. I just hoped he didn't go looking for a fight. I was left alone with Ronan, and for some odd reason I trusted him. Why? I have no clue. He was ruthless and would kill without a second thought to save himself and his people. Actually, maybe that was why. We had a few things in common.
I turned and faced the vashon in front of me. He hadn't moved. "We need to talk about Katherine and the other portraits. I accept that we were together in my past lives, but I'm not sure what you want from me now," I said.
I think my words floored Ronan. He stood motionless looking at me, s.h.i.+fting his velvet coat. That was a sure sign he was nervous. What was I suppose to do? Shut down with the knowledge of being with him in my past lives?
"I do not know what I want and I am unsure why I even told you," he said, looking confused.
"Do you think we will be together in this life?" I asked, feeling his sadness.
"I know you and Paris have feelings for each other. The way you look at each other. The way he protects you. For now I will bide my time," he said. As if, that really answered anything. I wasn't sure if I liked the last statement.
I didn't think it was that noticeable, how Paris felt about me. I was too confused to think about it. When in doubt or deep s.h.i.+t, get down to business.
"Did Ailin negotiate anything with Palmira?" I asked. Ronan went still. Oh, that was a bad sign. I took a deep breath. "What does she want?" I knew it was nothing good, especially from his reaction.
"She will take a trade," he said in a cautious voice.
"Who?" I asked, a knot starting to form in my stomach.
"Rafe or Caleb."
"No way. Caleb isn't strong enough. Seriously, I don't think Rafe can handle it mentally. Ailin needs to get back on the phone," I stated.
"I am afraid that this is the only option," Ronan explained.
"The h.e.l.l it is. I'm going in," I snapped.
I opened the door and started looking for Paris. Ronan was right behind me. I don't know if it was for my protection, or to talk me out of going to get Blaze - which was so not happening.
The aroma of warm bagels called to me and I followed the yummy scent. I found Paris, bagels, and all the non-vashon men. Paris slathered cream cheese on the ring of dough but he kept glancing at Alex, who stood not more than five feet away.
Ronan handed me a Diet c.o.ke. The drink of champions. If I didn't start getting some sleep soon, I'd have to find something with more caffeine. I opened it, took a long drink and hiccupped. I took a couple of bites of my bagel. "We need to come up with a plan to get Blaze back," I said.
"Do you have any ideas?" Paris asked. He was already on his second bagel. Lycanthropes' metabolisms run extremely high so they have to eat a lot and often.
"The only thing I know for a fact is I want a lot of guns. I'm also going to need a couple of volunteers. I don't want Rafe or Caleb to go - Palmira has shown way too much interest in them. Any takers?" I asked, finis.h.i.+ng my food.
"Jarod and I will go," Alex replied.
"I'm not sure how I feel about you going. I don't trust you in any sense of the word," I said, not sugarcoating it at all. "If you think you can keep your hands to yourself - and your d.i.c.k in your pants - fine. But know this, Alex: if you push your luck again, it just may run out," I said. Every word was cold and thought out.
The room was thick with tension, but I didn't give a c.r.a.p who was p.i.s.sed. I'd said my piece and everyone heard it. I grabbed my bottle of Diet c.o.ke and left. I needed my trench and weapons. I walked at a fast clip back to the room I'd left them in.
I stood in the doorway, breathing deeply before walking in and putting on the trench. It flapped like a cape. As I picked up the sheathed knives, a tingle of heated magick slammed into my back.
The scent of sage danced around my head and I readied myself. I knew Alex stood behind me. I knew my eyes bled violet, which seemed to come more easily lately. I turned and looked at him. I wouldn't let my guard down around him again.
"I didn't appreciate the show in the kitchen," he said, standing his ground.
"I don't give a s.h.i.+t if you liked it or not. I won't be your girlfriend, your s.l.u.t or anything else," I said, starting for the door.
He stepped in my path. I stopped. I didn't need his s.h.i.+t right now. I just stared at him. If he thought I was going to apologize, he was s.h.i.+t out of luck.
"Move, Alex. I won't ask again," I said, still wis.h.i.+ng like h.e.l.l that I had my gun. I'm going to start carrying my Ruger in my hand all the time.
"Or what?" he said in an angry voice. As if, I was the fly to his spider. Who s.h.i.+t in his Wheaties?
Over his shoulder, I saw Jarod. Size for size, he matched Alex, although Jarod was broader through the chest.
"Dagda, please let Logan pa.s.s," Jarod said in a calm voice. I'm glad somebody was calm, because I sure wasn't.
"I am King here. Are you telling me how to act?" Alex asked Jarod.
Jarod shook his head. "Then act like a King," he answered.
A low guttural growl vibrated out of Alex. We were getting into dominant s.h.i.+t now, and I wanted out of that room. The energy was suffocating. Plus, my brother was waiting to be rescued.
"I've had it. Jarod, I would be honored if you joined me. Alex, I don't need you. You can go j.a.c.k.-.o.f.f. somewhere. I think you need the release," I said.
Before I had time to react, Alex backhanded me. I brushed my hair away from my face, instantly enraged and in paid. But, I didn't give him the satisfaction of touching my face where he made contact. Behind me, I heard the distinct sound of a safety being clicked.
"Alex, move," Paris warned. "I would like nothing better to shoot you where you stand, you arrogant son of a b.i.t.c.h."
I knew my face was bruised. I've always bruised easily and I'm pretty much a lightweight when it comes to that. I also knew for a fact Paris would have no problem shooting Alex. Alex stepped aside slowly. I moved next to Paris.
"Alex, your stupidity is going to get you killed. I think it's time you wised up," Paris told him in a low controlled voice. "Don't follow us."
It was a warning Alex really needed to heed right now. Paris and I started down the corridor. To my surprise, Jarod joined us. It was obvious he too had had enough.
"Where's my gun?" I asked.
"In Ronan's room," Paris answered.
"Where's Ronan's room?" I asked, confused.
"The white and gold room," Paris stated as if I should've known.
I stopped. It meant I would have to turn around to get it. I didn't want to look at Alex right now. The white and gold room was across the hall from where I left him. "s.h.i.+t," I said. I didn't trust myself to retrieve the gun and not use it on the over-zealous Alex.