The Monikins Part 18

Ever since the vessel left the docks, there had been six sets of spars of a form so singular, lying among the booms, that they had often been the subject of conversation between the mates and myself, neither of the former being able to tell their uses. These sticks were of no great length, some fifteen feet at the most, of sound English oak. Two or three pairs were alike, for they were in pairs, each pair having one of the sides of a shape resembling different parts of the s.h.i.+p's bottom, with the exception that they were chiefly concave, while the bottom of a vessel is mainly convex. At one extremity each pair was firmly connected by a short, ma.s.sive, iron link, of about two feet in length; and, at its opposite end, a large eye-bolt was driven into each stick, where it was securely forelocked. When the Walrus was stationary, we learned, for the first time, the uses of these unusual preparations. A pair of the timbers, which were of great solidity and strength, were dropped over the stern, and, sinking beneath the keel, their upper extremities were separated by means of lanyards turned into the eye-bolts. The lanyards were then brought forward to the bilge of the vessel, where, by the help of tackles, the timbers were rowsed up in such a manner that the links came close to the false keel, and the timbers themselves were laid snug against each side of the s.h.i.+p. As great care had been taken, by means of marks on the vessel, as well as in forming the skids themselves, the fit was perfect. No less than five pairs were secured in and near the bilge, and as many more were distributed forwards and aft, according to the shape of the bottom. Fore-and-aft pieces, that reached from one skid to the other, were then placed between those about the bilge of the s.h.i.+p, each of them having a certain number of short ribs, extending upwards and downwards. These fore-and-aft pieces were laid along the waterline, their ends entering the skids by means of mortices and tenons, where they were snugly bolted. The result of the entire arrangement was, to give the vessel an exterior protection against the field-ice, by means of a sort of network of timber, the whole of which had been so accurately fitted in the dock, as to bear equally on her frame. These preparations were not fairly completed before ten o'clock on the following morning, when Noah stood directly for an opening in the ice before us, which just about that time began to be apparent.

"We sha'nt go so fast for our armor," observed the cautious old sealer; "but what we want in heels, we'll make up in bottom."

For the whole of that day we worked our devious course, by great labor and at uncertain intervals, to the southward; and at night we fastened the Walrus to a floe, in waiting for the return of light. Just as the day dawned, however, I heard a tremendous grating sound against the side of the vessel; and rus.h.i.+ng on deck, I found that we were completely caught between two immense fields, which seemed to be attracted towards each other for no other apparent purpose than to crush us. Here it was that the expedient of Captain Poke made manifest its merits. Protected by the ma.s.sive timbers and false ribs, the bilge of the s.h.i.+p resisted the pressure; and as, under such circ.u.mstances, something must yield, luckily nothing but the attraction of gravitation was overcome. The skids, through their inclination, acted as wedges, the links pressing against the keel; and in the course of an hour the Walrus was gradually lifted out of the water, maintaining her upright position, in consequence of the powerful nip of the floes. No sooner was this experiment handsomely effected, than Mr. Poke jumped upon the ice, and commenced an examination of the s.h.i.+p's bottom.

"Here's a dry-dock for you, Sir John!" exclaimed the old sealer, chuckling. "I'll have a patent for this, the moment I put foot ag'in in Stunin'tun."

A feeling of security, to which I had been a stranger ever since we entered the ice, was created by the composure of Noah, and by his self-congratulation at what he called his project to get a look at the Walrus's bottom. Notwithstanding all the fine declarations of exultation and success, however, that he flourished among us who were not mariners, I was much disposed to think that, like other men of extraordinary genius, he had blundered on the grand result of his "ice-screws," and that it was not foreseen and calculated. Let this be as it may, however, all hands were soon on the floe, with brooms, sc.r.a.pers, hammers, and nails, and the opportunity of repairing and cleaning was thoroughly improved.

For four-and-twenty hours the s.h.i.+p remained in the same att.i.tude, still as a church, and some of us began to entertain apprehensions that she might be kept on her frozen blocks forever. The accident had happened, according to the statements of Captain Poke, in lat. 78 degrees 13'

26"--although I never knew in what manner he ascertained the important particular of our precise situation. Thinking it might be well to get some more accurate ideas on this subject, after so long and ticklish a run, I procured the quadrant from Bob Ape, and brought it down upon the ice, where I made it a point, as an especial favor, the weather being favorable and the proper hour near, that our commander would correct his instinct by a solar observation. Noah protested that your old seaman, especially if a sealer and a Stunin'tunner, had no occasion for such geometry operations, as he termed them; that it might be well enough, perhaps necessary, for your counting-house, silk-gloved captains, who run between New York and Liverpool, to be rubbing up their gla.s.ses and polis.h.i.+ng their s.e.xtants, for they hardly ever knew where they were, except at such times; but as for himself, he had little need of turning star-gazer at his time of life, and that as he had already told me, he was getting to be near-sighted, and had some doubts whether he could discern an object like the sun, that was known to be so many thousands of millions of miles from the earth. These scruples, however, were overcome by my cleaning the gla.s.ses, preparing a barrel for him to stand on, that he might be at the customary elevation above his horizon, and putting the instrument into his hands, the mates standing near, ready to make the calculations when he gave the sun's declination.

"We are drifting south'ard, I know," said Mr. Poke before he commenced his sight--"I feel it in my bones. We are at this moment in 79 degrees 36' 14."--having made a southerly drift of more than eighty miles since yesterday noon. Now mind my words, and see what the sun will say about it."

When the calculations were made, our lat.i.tude was found to be 79 degrees 35' 47". Noah was somewhat puzzled by the difference, for which he could in no plausible way account, as the observation had been unusually good and certain. But an opinionated and an ingenious man is seldom at a loss to find a sufficient reason to establish his own correctness, or to prove the mistakes of others.

"Ay, I see how it is," he said, after a little cogitation, "the sun must be wrong--it should be no wonder if the sun did get a little out of his track in these high, cold lat.i.tudes. Yes, yes; the sun must be wrong."

I was too much delighted at being certain we were going on our course to dispute the point, and the great luminary was abandoned to the imputation of sometimes being in error. Dr. Reasono took occasion to say, in my private ear, that there was a sect of philosophers in Leaphigh, who had long distrusted the accuracy of the planetary system, and who had even thrown out hints that the earth, In its annual revolution, moved in a direction absolutely contrary to that which nature had contemplated when she gave the original polar impulse; but that, as regarded himself, he thought very little of these opinions, as he had frequent occasion to observe that there was a large cla.s.s of monikins whose ideas always went uphill.

For two more days and as many nights, we continued to drift with the floes to the southward, or as near as might be, towards the haven of our wishes. On the fourth morning, there was a suitable change in the weather; both thermometer and barometer rose; the air became more bland, and most of our cats and dogs, notwithstanding we were still surrounded by the ice, began to cast their skins. Dr. Reasono noted these signs, and stepping on the floe, he brought back with him a considerable fragment of the frozen element. This was carried to the camboose, where it was subjected to the action of fire, which, within a given number of minutes, pretty much as a matter of course, as I thought, caused it to melt. The whole process was watched with an anxiety the most intense, by the whole of the monikins, however; and when the result was announced, the amiable and lovely Chatterissa clapped her pretty little pattes with joy, and gave all the other natural indications of delight, which characterize the emotions of that gentle s.e.x of which she was so bright an ornament. Dr. Reasono was not backwards in explaining the cause of so much unusual exhilaration, for hitherto her manner had been characterized by the well-bred and sophisticated restraint which marks high training. The experiment had shown, by the infallible and scientific tests of monikin chemistry, that we were now within the influence of a steam-climate, and there could no longer be any rational doubt of our eventual arrival in the polar basin.

The result proved that the philosopher was right. About noon the floes, which all that day had begun to a.s.sume what is termed a "sloppy character," suddenly gave way, and the Walrus settled down into her proper element, with great equanimity and propriety. Captain Poke lost no time in uns.h.i.+pping the skids; and a smacking breeze, that was well saturated with steam, springing up from the westward, we made sail. Our course was due south, without regard to the ice, which yielded before our bows like so much thick water, and just as the sun set, we entered the open sea, rioting in the luxuriance of its genial climate, in triumph.

Sail was carried on the s.h.i.+p all that night; and just as the day dawned, we made the first mile-stone, a proof, not to be mistaken, that we were now actually within the monikin region. Dr. Reasono had the goodness to explain to us the history of these aquatic phenomena. It would seem that when the earth exploded, its entire crust, throughout the whole of this part of the world, was started upwards in such a way as to give a very uniform depth to the sea, which in no place exceeds four fathoms. It follows, as a consequence, that no prevalence of northerly winds can force the icebergs beyond 78 degrees of south lat.i.tude, as they invariably ground on reaching the outer edge of the polar bank. The floes, being thin, are melted of course; and thus, by this beneficent prevention, the monikin world is kept entirely free from the very danger to which a vulgar mind would be the most apt to believe it is the most exposed.

A congress of nations had been held, about five centuries since, which was called the Holy-philo-marine-safety-and-find-the-way Alliance. At this congress the high contracting parties agreed to name a commission to make provision, generally, for the secure navigation of the seas. One of the expedients of this commission, which, by the way, is said to have been composed of very ill.u.s.trious monikins, was to cause ma.s.sive blocks of stone to be laid down, at measured distances, throughout the whole of the basin, and in which other stone uprights were secured. The necessary inscriptions were graved on proper tablets, and as we approached the one already named, I observed that it had the image of a monikin, carved also in stone, with his tail extended in a right line, pointing, as Mr.

Poke a.s.sured me, S. and by W. half W. I had made sufficient progress in the monikin language to read, as we glided past this watermark--"To Leaphigh,--15 miles." One monikin mile, however, we were next told, was equal to nine English statute miles; and, consequently, we were not so near our port as was at first supposed. I expressed great satisfaction at finding ourselves so fairly on the road, however, and paid Dr.

Reasono some well-merited compliments on the high state of civilization to which his species had evidently arrived. The day was not distant, I added, when it was reasonable to suppose, our own seas would have floating restaurants and cafes, with suitable pot-houses for the mariners; though I did not well see how we were to provide a subst.i.tute for their own excellent organization of mile-stones. The Doctor received my compliments with becoming modesty, saying that he had no doubt mankind would do all that lay in their power to have good eating and drinking-houses, whereever they could be established; but as to the marine milestones, he agreed with me, that there was little hope of their being planted, until the crust of the earth should be driven upwards, so as to rise within four fathoms of the surface of the water.

On the other hand, Captain Poke held this latter improvement very cheap.

He affirmed it was no sign of civilization at all, for, as a man became civilized, he had less need of primers and finger-boards; and, as for Leaphigh, any tolerable navigator could see it bore S. by W. half W.

allowing for variation, distant 135 English miles. To these objections I was silent, for I had frequent occasion to observe that men very often underrate any advantage of which they have come into the enjoyment by a providential interposition.

Just as the sun was in the meridian, the cry of "land ahead" was heard from aloft. The monikins were all smiles and grat.i.tude; the crew were excited by admiration and wonder; and as for myself, I was literally ready to jump out of my skin, not only with delight, but, in some measure also, from the exceeding warmth of the atmosphere. Our cats and dogs began to uncase; Bob was obliged to unmask his most exposed frontier, by removing the union-jack; and Noah himself fairly appeared on deck in his s.h.i.+rt and night-cap. The amiable strangers were too much occupied to be particular, and I slipped into my state-room to change my toilet to a dress of thin silk, that was painted to resemble the skin of a polar bear--a contradiction between things that is much too common in our species ever to be deemed out of fas.h.i.+on.

We neared the land with great rapidity, impelled by a steam-breeze, and just as the sun sank in the horizon our anchor was let go, in the outer harbor of the city of Aggregation.

CHAPTER XV. AN ARRIVAL--FORMS OF RECEPTION--SEVERAL NEW CHRISTENINGS--AN OFFICIAL DOc.u.mENT, AND TERRA FIRMA.

It is always agreeable to arrive safe, at the end of a long, fatiguing, and hazardous journey. But the pleasure is considerably augmented when the visit is paid to a novel region, with a steam-climate, and which is peopled by a new species. My own satisfaction, too was coupled with the reflection that I had been of real service to four very interesting and well-bred strangers, who had been cast, by an adverse fortune, into the hands of humanity, and who owed to me a boon far more precious than life itself--a restoration to their natural and acquired rights, their proper stations in society, and sacred liberty! The reader will judge, therefore, with what inward self-congratulation I now received the acknowledgments of the whole monikin party, and listened to their most solemn protestations ever to consider, not only all they might jointly and severally possess in the way of estates and dignities, at my entire disposal, but their persons as my slaves. Of course, I made as light as possible of any little service I might have done them, protesting in my turn, that I looked upon the whole affair more in the light of a party of pleasure than a tax, reminding them that I had not only obtained an insight into a new philosophy, but that I was already, thanks to the decimal system, a tolerable proficient in their ancient and learned language. These civilities were scarcely well over, before we were boarded by the boat of the port-captain.

The arrival of a human s.h.i.+p was an event likely to create excitement in a monikin country; and as our approach had been witnessed for several hours, preparations had been made to give us a proper reception. The section of the academy to whom is committed the custody of the "Science of Indications," was hastily a.s.sembled by order of the king, who, by the way, never speaks except through the mouth of his oldest male first cousin, who, by the fundamental laws of the realm, is held responsible for all his official acts (in private, the king is allowed almost as many privileges as any other monikin), and who, as is due to him in simple justice, is permitted to exercise, in a public point of view, the functions of the eyes, ears, nose, conscience, and tail of the monarch.

The savans were active, and as they proceeded with method, and on well-established principles, their report was quickly made. It contained, as we afterwards understood, seven sheets of premises, eleven of argument, sixteen of conjecture, and two lines of deduction. This heavy draft on the monikin intellect was duly achieved by dividing the work into as many parts as there were members of the section present, viz., forty. The substance of their labors was, to say that the vessel in sight was a strange vessel; that it came to a strange country, on a strange errand, being manned by strangers; and that its objects were more likely to be peaceful than warlike, since the gla.s.ses of the academy did not enable them to discover any means of annoyance, with the exception of certain wild beasts, who appeared, however, to be peaceably occupied in working the s.h.i.+p. All this was sententiously expressed in the purest monikin language. The effect of the report was, to cause all hostile preparations to be abandoned.

No sooner did the boat of the port-captain return to the sh.o.r.e with the news that the strange s.h.i.+p had arrived with my Lord Chatterino, my Lady Chatterissa and Dr. Reasono than there was a general burst of joy along the strand. In a very short time the king--alias his eldest first cousin of the male gender--ordered the usual compliments to be paid to his distinguished subjects. A deputation of young lords the hopes of Leaphigh came off to receive their colleague; whilst a bevy of beautiful maidens of n.o.ble birth crowded around the smiling and graceful Chatterissa, gladdening her heart with their caressing manners and felicitations. The n.o.ble pair left us in separate boats, each attended by an appropriate escort. We overlooked the little neglect of forgetting to take leave of us, for joy had quite set them both beside themselves.

Next came a long procession composed of high numbers, all of the "brown-study color." These learned and dignified persons were a deputation from the academy, which had sent forth no less than forty of its number to receive Dr. Reasono. The meeting between these loving friends of monikinity and of knowledge, was conducted on the most approved principles of reason. Each section (there are forty in the academy of Leaphigh) made an address, to all of which the Doctor returned suitable replies, always using exactly the same sentiments, but varying the subject by transpositions, as dictionaries are known to be composed by the ingenious combinations of the twenty-six letters of the alphabet. Dr. Reasono withdrew with his coadjutors, to my surprise paying not a whit more attention to Captain Poke and myself, than would be paid in any highly-civilized country of Christendom, on a similar occasion, by a collection of the learned, to the accidental presence of two monkeys. I thought this augured badly, and began to feel as became Sir John Goldencalf, Bart., of Householder Hall, in the kingdom of Great Britain, when my sensations were nipped in the bud by the arrival of the officers of registration and circulation. It was the duty of the latter to give us the proper pa.s.sports to enter into and to circulate within the country, after the former had properly enregistered our numbers and colors, in such a way as to bring us within the reach of taxation. The officer of registration was very expeditious from long practice. He decided, at once, that I formed a new cla.s.s by myself; of which, of course, I was No. 1. The captain and his two mates formed another, Nos.

1, 2, and 3. Bob had a cla.s.s also to himself, and the honors of No. 1; and the crew formed a fresh cla.s.s, being numbered according to height, as the register deemed their merits to be altogether physical. Next came the important point of color, on which depended the quality of the cla.s.s or caste, the numbers merely indicating our respective stations in the particular divisions. After a good deal of deliberation, and many interrogatories, I was enregistered as No. 1, flesh-color. Noah as No.

1, sea-water color, and his mates 2 and 3, accordingly. Bob as No. 1, s.m.u.t-color, and the crew as Nos. 1, 2, 3, etc., tar-color. The officer now called upon an a.s.sistant to come forth with a sort of knitting-needle heated red-hot, in order to affix the official stamp to each in succession. Luckily for us all, Noah happened to be the first to whom the agent of the stamp-office applied, to uncase and to prepare for the operation. The result was one of those bursts of eloquent and logical vituperation, and of remonstrating outcries, to which any new personal exaction never failed to give birth in the sealer. His discourse on this occasion might be divided into the several following heads, all of which were very ingeniously embellished by the usual expletives and imagery:--"He was not a beast to be branded like a horse, nor a slave to be treated like a Congo n.i.g.g.e.r; he saw no use in applying the marks to men, who were sufficiently distinguished from monkeys already; Sir John had a handle before his name, and if he liked it, he might carry his name behind his body, by way of counterpoise, but for his part, he wanted no outriggers of the sort, being satisfied with plain Noah Poke; he was a republican, and it was anti-republican for a man to carry about with him graven images; he thought it might be even flying in the face of the Scriptures, or what was worse, turning his back on them; he said that the Walrus had her name, in good legible characters on her starn, and that might answer for both of them; he protested, d--n his eyes, that he wouldn't be branded like a thief; he incontinently wished the keeper of the privy seal to the d---l; he insisted there was no use in the practice, unless one threw all aback, and went starn foremost into society, a rudeness at which human natur'

revolted; he knew a man in Stunin'tun who had five names, and he should like to know what they would do with him, if this practice should come into fas.h.i.+on there; he had no objection to a little paint, but no red-hot knitting-needle should make acquaintance with his flesh, so long as he walked his quarter-deck."

The keeper of the seals listened to this remonstrance with singular patience and decorum; a forbearance that was probably owing to his not understanding a word that had been said. But there is a language that is universal, and it is not less easy to comprehend when a man is in a pa.s.sion, than it is to comprehend any other irritated animal. The officer of the registration department, on this hint, politely inquired of me, if some part of his official duties were not particularly disagreeable to No. 1, sea-water color. On my admitting that the captain was reluctant to be branded, he merely shrugged his shoulders, and observed that the exactions of the public were seldom agreeable, but that duty was duty, that the stamp act was peremptory, and not a foot of ours could touch Leaphigh until we were all checked off in this manner, in exact conformity with the registration. I was much puzzled what to do, by this indomitable purpose to perform his duty in the officer; for, to own the truth, my own cuticle had quite as much aversion to the operation, as of Captain Poke himself. It was not the principle so much as the novelty of its application which distressed me; for I had travelled too much not to know that a stranger rarely enters a civilized country without being more or less skinned, the merest savages only permitting him to pa.s.s unscathed. It suddenly came to my recollection that the monikins had left all the remains of their particular stores on board, consisting of an ample supply of delicious nuts. Sending for a bag of the best of them, I ordered it to be put into the register's boat, informing him at the same time, that I was conscious they were quite unworthy of him, but that I hoped, such as they were, he would allow me to make an offering of them to his wife. This attention was properly felt and received; and a few minutes afterwards, a certificate in the following words was put into my hands, viz.:

"Leaphigh, season of promise, day of performance: Whereas, certain persons of the human species have lately presented themselves to be enregistered, according to the statute 'for the promotion of order and cla.s.sification, and for the collection of contributions'; and whereas, these persons are yet in the second cla.s.s of the animal probation, and are more subject to bodily impressions than the higher, or monikin species: Now, know all monikins, etc., that they are stamped in paint, and that only by their numbers; each cla.s.s among them being easily to be distinguished from the others, by outward and indelible proofs.

"Signed,

"No. 8,020 office-color."

I was told that all we had to do now was to mark ourselves with paint or tar, as we might choose, the latter being recommended for the crew; taking no further trouble than to number ourselves; and when we went ash.o.r.e, if any of the gens-d'armes inquired why we had not the legal impression on our persons, which quite possibly would be the case, as the law was absolute in its requisitions, all we had to do was to show the certificate; but if the certificate was not sufficient, we were men of the world, and understood the nature of things so well, that we did not require to be taught so simple a proposition in philosophy, as that which says, "like causes produce like effects"; and he presumed I could not have so far overrated his merits, as to have sent the whole of my nuts into his boat. I avow that I was not very sorry to hear the officer throw out these hints, for they convinced me that my journey through Leaphigh would be accompanied with less embarra.s.sment than I had antic.i.p.ated, since I now plainly perceived that monikins act on principles that are not very essentially different from those of the human race in general.

The complaisant register and the keeper of the privy seal took their departure together, when we forthwith proceeded to number ourselves in compliance with his advice. As the principle was already settled, we had no difficulty with its application, Noah, Bob, myself, and the largest of the seamen being all Nos. 1, and the rest ranking in order. By this time it was night. The guard-boats began to appear on the water, and we deferred disembarking until morning.

All hands were early afoot. It had been arranged that Captain Poke and myself, attended by Bob, as a domestic, were to land, in order to make a journey through the island, while the Walrus was to be left in charge of the mates and the crew; the latter having permission to go ash.o.r.e, from time to time, as is the practice with all seamen in port. There was a great deal of preliminary scrubbing and shaving, before the whole party could appear on deck, properly attired for the occasion. Mr. Poke wore a thin dress of linen, admirably designed to make him look like a sea-lion; a conceit that he said was not only agreeable to his feelings and habits, but which had a cool and pleasant character that was altogether suited to a steam-climate. For my own part, I agreed with the worthy sealer, seeing but little difference between his going in this garb, and his going quite naked. My dress was made, on a design of my own, after the social-stake system; or, in other words, it was so arranged as to take an interest in half of the animals of Exeter Change, to which MENAGERIE the artist by whom it had been painted was sent expressly, in order to consult nature. Bob wore the effigy, as his master called it, of a turnspit.

The monikins were by far too polished to crowd about us when we landed, with an impertinent and troublesome curiosity. So far from this, we were permitted to approach the capital itself without let or hindrance. As it is less my intention to describe physical things than to dwell upon the philosophy and the other moral aspects of the Leaphigh world, little more will be said of their houses, domestic economy, and other improvements in the arts, than may be gathered incidentally, as the narrative shall proceed. Let it suffice to say on these heads, that the Leaphigh monikins, like men, consult, or think they consult--which, so long as they know no better, amounts to pretty much the same thing--their own convenience in all things, the pocket alone excepted; and that they continue very laudably to do as their fathers did before them, seldom making changes, unless they may happen to possess the recommendation of being exotics; when, indeed, they are sometimes adopted, probably on account of their possessing the merit of having been proved suitable to another state of things.

Among the first persons we met, on entering the great square of Aggregation, as the capital of Leaphigh is called when rendered into English, was my Lord Chatterino. He was gayly promenading with a company of young n.o.bles, who all seemed to be enjoying their youth, health, rank, and privileges with infinite gusto. We met this party in a way to render an escape from mutual recognition impossible. At first I thought, from his averted eye, that it was the intention of our late s.h.i.+pmate to consider our knowledge of each other as one of those accidental acquaintances which, it is known, we all form at watering-places, on journeys, or in the country, and which it is ill-mannered to press upon others in town; or, as Captain Poke afterwards expressed it, like the intimacy between an Englishman and a Yankee, that has been formed in the house of the latter, on better wine than is met with anywhere else, and which was never yet known to withstand the influence of a British fog.

"Why, Sir John," the sealer added, "I once tuck (he meant to say TOOK, not TUCKED) a countryman of yours under my wing, at Stunin'tun, during the last war. He was a prisoner, as we make prisoners; that is, he went and did pretty much as he pleased; and the fellow had the best of everything--mola.s.ses that a spoon would stand up in, pork that would do to slush down a topmast, and New England rum, that a king might set down to, but could not get up from--well, what was the end on't? Why, as sure as we are among these monkeys, the fellow BOOKED me. Had I BOOKED but the half of what he guzzled, the amount, I do believe, would have taken the transaction out of any justice's court in the state. He said my mola.s.ses was meagre, the pork lean, and the liquor infernal. There were truth and grat.i.tude for you! He gave the whul account, too, as a specimen of what he called American living!"

Hereupon I reminded my companion, that an Englishman did not like to receive even favors on compulsion; that when he meets a stranger in his own country, and is master of his own actions, no man understands better what true hospitality is, as I hoped one day to show him, at Householder Hall; as to his first remark, he ought to remember that an Englishman considered America as no more than the country, and that it would be ill-mannered to press an acquaintance made there.

Noah, like most other men, was very reasonable on all subjects that did not interfere with his prejudices or his opinions; and he very readily admitted the general justice of my reply.

"It's pretty much as you say, Sir John," he continued; "in England you may press men, but it won't do to press hospitality. Get a volunteer in this way, and he is as good a fellow as heart can wish. I shouldn't have cared so much about the chap's book, if he had said nothin' ag'in the rum. Why, Sir John, when the English bombarded Stunin'tun with eighteen pounders, I proposed to load our old twelve with a gallon out of the very same cask, for I do think it would have huv' the shot the best part of a mile!"

--But this digression is leading me from the narrative. My Lord Chatterino turned his head a little on one side as we were pa.s.sing, and I was deliberating whether, under the circ.u.mstances, it would be well-bred to remind him of our old acquaintance, when the question was settled by the decision of Captain Poke, who placed himself in such a position that it was no easy matter to get round him, through him, or over him--or who laid himself what he called "athwart hawse."

"Good morning, my lord," said the straightforward seaman, who generally went at a subject as he went at a seal. "A fine warm day; and the smell of the land, after so long a pa.s.sage, is quite agreeable to the nose, whatever its ups and downs may be to the legs."

The companions of the young peer looked amazed; and some of them, I thought, notwithstanding gravity and earnestness are rather characteristic of the monikin physiognomy, betrayed a slight disposition to laugh. Not so with my Lord Chatterino himself.

He examined us a moment through a gla.s.s, and then seemed suddenly, and on the whole, agreeably struck at seeing us.

"How, Goldencalf!" he cried in surprise, "you in Leaphigh! This is indeed an unexpected satisfaction; for it will now be in my power to prove some of the facts that I am telling my friends, by actual observation. Here are two of the humans, gents, of whom I was but this moment giving you some account--"

Observing a disposition to merriment in his a.s.sociates, he continued, looking exceedingly grave:--

"Restrain yourselves, gentlemen, I pray you. These are very worthy people, I do a.s.sure you, in their own way, and are not at all to be ridiculed. I scarcely know, even in our own marine, a better or a bolder navigator than this honest seaman; and as for the one in the parti-colored skin, I will take upon myself to say, that he is really a person of some consideration in his own little circle. He is, I believe, a member of par--par--par--am I right, Sir John?--a member of--"

"Parliament, my lord--an M.P."

"Ay--I thought I had it--an M.P., or a member of Parliament, in his own country, which, I dare say now, is some such thing among his people, as a public proclaimer of those laws which come from his majesty's eldest first cousin of the masculine gender, may be among us. Some such thing--eh--now--eh--is it not, Sir John?"

"I dare say it is, my lord."