The Unknown Sea - LightNovelsOnl.com
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But while he did not answer, her old light came to her for reading the tense inquiry of his eyes. Did they demand acknowledgment of her defeat and his supremacy? No, she would not own that; he should not know.
'And have you feared to keep what you got of the sea? And have you flung it away, as I counselled when last you beheld me?'
The strong, haggard face never altered for contest. He asked slowly:
'Was it a vision of Diadyomene that rose up to the waves through the shadow of a fisher's boat?'
With an effort she set her eyes at his defiantly.
'It was not I. I? For what cause?'
'He called you.'
'I come for no man's call.'
Against her will her eyes fell.
'Look at me, Diadyomene; for an evil dream haunts me, and your eyes have got it hid.'
'An evil dream!'
She laughed, but her breath came quick as again their looks encountered.
What she met in the steadfast grey eyes brought terror gathering to her own. She shuddered and covered her face.
'An evil dream haunts _me_, and _your_ eyes have got it hid.'
He watched, dazed, and muttered: 'You--you.'
'What is it?--what is it?' she cried. 'Why have you brought it with you out of season? It is like an air that I cannot breathe. Take it away!'
Never before had she shown so human a weakness, nor had she ever shown so womanly fair. Her clear eyes dilated, her whole face quivered, and for an instant a shadow of vague wistfulness crossed her fear. Her lover's heart beat free of dreams, for a pa.s.sion of tenderness responded to her need.
'Ah, Diadyomene, no! Can you so dream it, when, to keep all evil from you, I would, G.o.d willing, enter h.e.l.l?'
'May be,' she whispered, 'it is what you call h.e.l.l I enter, every year once, when my dream comes.'
Appalled he heard. 'You shall not, Diadyomene, you shall not! Come to me, call me, and what heart of man can brave, by my soul I will, and keep you safe.'
She found his eyes again, within them only love, and she rallied.
'It is only a dream,' she said. 'And yet to escape it I would give up many choice moments of glorious sea life.'
She eyed him hard, and clenched her hands. 'I would give up,' she said, 'the strongest desire my heart now holds; ay, in the dear moment of its fulfilment, I would give up even that, if so a certain night of the year might pa.s.s ever dreamless and untroubled.'
'So would not I! though I think my dream cannot be less terrible than yours; though I know my desire cannot be less dear. Diadyomene, what is the desire of your heart?'
She would not say; and she meant with her downcast, shy eyes to mislead him. But in vain: too humble was he to presume.
'Diadyomene, what is your dream?'
'I cannot tell,' she said, 'for it pa.s.ses so that my brain holds but an echo of it, and my heart dread. And what remains of it cannot be told, for words are too poor and feeble to express it.'
He saw her thinking, sighing, and shuddering.
'How near is its coming?' he asked, and but half heeding she told, counting by the terms of the moon.
'Agonistes, how I know not, my deep, strong love of the sea grows somewhat faint when the hour draws near to dream; and the land, the poor, hard, unsatisfying land, grows some degrees dearer. Ah! but I loathe it after, when my life again beats strong and true with the pulse of the deep. Keep you far from me then, lest I hate you--yes, even you--hate you to death.'
'Rather bid me here, to watch out the night with you.'
'I forbid it!' she said, suddenly fierce and wary. 'Take heed! Wilful, deliberate trespa.s.s against my express will shall find no pity, no pardon.'
Quick she saw that, intemperate, she had startled her prey; therefore she amended, smiling sadly.
'See you how those diverse tides sway me even now. Agonistes, were you not of the land--did you share the sea--then may be--ah, ah----
'I will try to tell you. An awful sense of desolation falls, for I feel dry earth underfoot, and thin air, and I hear the sea moaning for me, but turn where I will I cannot see nor reach it: it lies beyond a lost path, and the glories, blisses, and strengths it gives me wither and die. And then horrors of the land close round me.
'What are they? I know not; they whirl past me so that their speed conceals them; yet, as streaks, are they hideous and ghastly. And I hear fearful sounds of speech, but not one distinct, articulate word. And in my dream I know that if any one stays, stands, confronts me, to be seen fully in the eyes and heard out clear from the din, all my joy of the sea would lie dead for ever, and the very way back would vanish.'
Christian had his own incomparable vision of the magic of the sea to oppose and ponder.
'Ah! you cannot comprehend, for I tell of it by way of the senses, and they are without, but this is within: in my veins, my breath, my fibres of life. It is I--me.'
'I can, ah! I can.'
'Yet the dear heart of the sea holds me fast through all; with imperious kindness it seizes my will when my love grows slackest, and draws me out of the shallows; and down, and down I drift, like weed.'
'Diadyomene, have you never defied your fear, and kept from sleep, and kept from the sea?'
Her voice sank. 'If I did--my dream might--come true.
'Agonistes, what I saw in your eyes was--I doubted--my dream--coming true.
'No; I will not look again.'
Christian's voice was as low and shaken as hers. 'What was there?' he said.
Again and again she gathered her breath for speech, yet at last was scarce audible.
'A horror--a living human body--tortured with fire and scourge--flayed.'
She lifted one glance and took the imprint of a strange tranced face, bloodless as death, void of speculation. p.r.o.ne she sank to the edge of the altar rock, for such pa.s.sions leapt up and grappled in desperate conflict as dissolved her strength under exquisite throes.
She never raised her head, till, after long wrestle, malice--strong, full-grown malice--recovered and stood up triumphant over all. And not one word all that while had come from her lover.
There lay he, his bright head low within reach of her hand. His tranquil ease, his quiet breath, flouted her before she saw that his eyes were closed in real sleep. His eyes were closed.