Frivolities Part 26

Again Miss Welsh obeyed, dolefully, yet conscientiously withal. The result was that when the rope was tightened--and Miss Welsh, in the most conscientious manner, drew it as tight as she possibly could--Mr.

Bennett's lower portions were imprisoned in the sack in a manner which was hardly dignified. He might have been about to engage in a sack-race, only he did not appear to be in a sack-racing frame of mind. Miss Welsh seemed to feel that she was hardly treating him in the way in which one would wish to treat one's best young man. It was evident that Mr. Bennett had not the slightest doubt but that he was being used very badly indeed.

"Take the bottle and sponge, which you will find in his right-hand pocket, and the revolver, which you will find in his left, and place them on the bed." Miss Welsh did as her mistress told her. "Now tie him up with the cord so as to render him incapable of moving a limb.

There are thirty-two yards of it. With that quant.i.ty, and the exercise of a little skill, you should be able to make him tolerably secure."

As Miss Jones said this it almost seemed that Miss Welsh started. Mr.

Bennett certainly did. Miss Welsh looked at him with such piteous eyes; Mr. Bennett favoured her with an unmistakable scowl--a scowl, indeed, of singular malignity. Then she proceeded to tie him up. In doing so she showed considerable skill and conscientiousness to boot.

She first pa.s.sed the rope two or three times right round him, so as to pinion his arms to his sides. Then, putting her foot up against his side, so as to enable her to use it as a lever, she hauled the rope as tight as she could. She did not seem to enjoy the hauling part of it--nor did Mr. Bennett, for the matter of that. She was a woman of undeniable strength; it was a wonder that she did not cut in two the man she had promised to marry. When the rope was at its utmost tension she made a most dexterous knot. He would have been tolerably secure had she done no more. But she did a great deal more; in that conscientious way she had she ran the rope about his legs, hauling it fast with the same ingenuity of method--with such energy, in fact, that she hauled him off his legs, and both he and she fell flat upon the floor.

"Pick yourself up, Hannah; and you had better continue to tie Mr.

Bennett where he lies--you will find it more convenient, perhaps."

Miss Welsh acted on Miss Jones's hint. But, however it may have added to her convenience, so far as Mr. Bennett was concerned it made the matter worse. She performed her task in such a very conscientious way; she rolled him over and over, she knelt on him--to give her leverage in hauling she even stood on him--she stood him on his feet and on his head. It certainly was _not_ a favourable example of the way in which a young woman should use her best young man.

"Now, Hannah, you can stand Mr. Bennett on his feet," remarked Miss Jones, when she saw that Miss Welsh had completed her task. "If Mr.

Bennett is unable to stand you had better prop him up with his back against the wall."

Miss Welsh propped Mr. Bennett up with his back against the wall: he would have certainly been unable to stand alone. Miss Jones addressed herself to him:

"You see, Mr. Bennett, how entirely I have Hannah under my control.

She is beautifully subjective. As I pointed out to you before, I a.s.sure you I have obtained some really remarkable results with Hannah.

I hope that you have enjoyed all that you have seen--have you?"

Mr. Bennett feebly shook his head. He did not seem to have sufficient energy left to enable him to say he hadn't. He was too much tied up.

Miss Jones went on--

"Before we part--and we are about to part, for the present, at least--I should like to address to you a few appropriate remarks.

Burglary, I need not point out to you, Mr. Bennett, is criminal, and not only criminal, but cowardly. You select, as a rule, the night. You choose, preferentially, a house in which the inhabitants are helpless.

You steal upon them unawares, prepared, if necessary, to take their lives at the moment when they are least able to defend them. You yourself are a coward of the most despicable sort, or you would never have come, in the dead of the night, certainly to rob, and perhaps to kill, an unprotected woman. I cannot describe to you the satisfaction which I feel when I consider that this is a case of the biter bit.

When I think how conscious you yourself must be of how completely the tables have been turned, I a.s.sure you that I am ready to dance about the room with joy. I trust, Mr. Bennett, that you will perceive and allow that these few remarks point a moral and adorn a tale. What I am now about to do with you is this. You brought that chloroform to stupefy me. On the contrary, with it Hannah shall stupefy you. When you are stupefied she will open the window, she will drag you to it, and she will drop you out. There is only a drop of about twelve feet.

There is a flower-bed beneath. I hope you will not fall hard. You will damage the flowers, I am afraid; but, under the circ.u.mstances, I will excuse you that. You will lie there through the night. In the morning I will take care that a policeman finds you there. He will see the inscription written by yourself, and sewn on your breast by Hannah. He will see that you are George Bennett, the burglar, and he will act on the hint contained in the last line--he will make further inquiries at Acacia Villa. I a.s.sure you I will answer them. I will prosecute you with the utmost rigour of the law. You have doubtless, in the course of your career, been guilty of mult.i.tudinous crimes. I think I know a means of bringing every one of them home to you. You will be sentenced to a long term of penal servitude. For a considerable time to come I shall know where to find you should I desire to subject you to further experiment."

As Miss Jones made these observations, which she did in the sweetest and most musical of voices, she continued to enjoy her cigarette. A fairer picture of feminine indulgence in the nicotian weed, it is not improbable, was never seen. But neither Mr. Bennett nor Miss Welsh seemed to appreciate the opportunity they had of observing the fair picture under circ.u.mstances of such exceptional advantage--the gentleman even less than the lady. After a short pause the beautiful young smoker gave a few instructions to Miss Welsh:

"Hannah, take that bottle of chloroform and that sponge. Empty the contents of the bottle on to the sponge; then press the sponge against Mr. Bennett's mouth and nose, and hold it there."

As Miss Jones said this an expression of great agony struggled through the stupor which was the prevailing characteristic of Mr. Bennett's face. It seemed as though he struggled to speak. But his tongue was mute. Miss Welsh, too, seemed unutterably sad. At the same time she did as her mistress bade. She drew the cork out of the bottle and emptied the contents on to the sponge. As she did so Mr. Bennett's eyes pa.s.sed from Miss Welsh to Miss Jones, and from Miss Jones to Miss Welsh, with something of that look of dumb agony which it is so painful to see at times upon the face of a dog. Miss Welsh emptied the bottle to its latest drop. She advanced towards Mr. Bennett, labelled, tied, and propped up against the wall. He made a perceptible effort to give expression to his agony in speech. But Miss Welsh gave him no time. She clapped the sponge upon his mouth and nose, pressing his head with all her force against the wall. He s.h.i.+vered, gave a sort of sigh, and fell, lying where he had fallen. Under Miss Welsh's forcible manipulation the anaesthetic had quickly done its work.

"Open the window wide!" Miss Welsh opened the window wide. "Pick Mr.

Bennett up!" Miss Welsh picked him up. "Carry him to the window!" She carried him to the window. It was a curious spectacle to see her bearing all that was near and dear to her to his ignominious doom.

"Throw him out!" She threw him out. There was a momentary silence.

Then came the sound of a thud. Mr. Bennett had fallen on the flower-bed beneath. "Shut the window down!" Miss Welsh shut the window down. "Go to the door, turn round, and look at me!" Miss Welsh did as she was bidden. She shuddered when her eyes encountered her mistress's glorious...o...b...

The young smoker, raising her exquisitely-shaped hand, made a slight movement with it in the air.

"Leave the room and go to bed!" she said. Miss Welsh left the room and disappeared.

When she was left alone Miss Cecilia Jones carefully extinguished her cigarette, putting the unconsumed fragment in a little ash-tray which was fastened to the wall above her head. She replaced the pillows in their former position; under one of them she placed her revolver, on it she placed her head. Touching one of the ivory b.u.t.tons, which she could easily do from where she lay, instantly the room was dark. In the darkness, having made herself comfortable between the sheets, she set herself to woo sweet sleep.

Ninepence!

I had gone in to get a gla.s.s of ale--into the four-ale bar. The place was pretty full. Scarcely had I begun to absorb my liquid when a gentleman of the nondescript sort, having a remnant of a red handkerchief tied about his neck, favoured me with this inquiry:

"If a party what you knew nothink at all about, and never seed afore in all your dyes, was to ask you to lend 'im ninepence, would you lend it 'im?"

As I thought it possible that the party in question might be himself, I lost no time whatever in replying, "Certainly not."

He turned to a friend with sandy hair and a suit of clothes which, unless he had decreased to half his size since first he had them, must originally have been somebody else's.

"That is what I says. Isn't that what I says? I says I wouldn't. No more I wouldn't."

The friend tilted his cap over his eyes, and he dug the knuckles of his right hand into the back of his head. I have not the faintest notion why. And he held forth thus:

"It was like this here. I was in the bar, yer know, along with some other parties, yer know, as it might be me and you in 'ere, when 'e comes in."

"Who come in?"

"Why this 'ere bloke. He says to me, 'If this ain't a pretty start, what is?' I says, 'What's up now?' He says, 'Just cast your eyes round me.' And he lifts up the tails of 'is coat--'e 'ad a tail-coat on, leastways it 'ad been a tail-coat once--and 'e says, 'Them's trousers.' I says, 'They don't look it.' 'E says, 'They don't. And that's 'ow I'll lose a fortune.' I says, ''Ow do you make that out?' 'E says, 'I'll tell yer, seeing as 'ow you're a friend.'"

"Was 'e a friend of yourn? I thought yer said yer'd never seed 'im afore?"

"More I 'adn't. 'E draws the back of 'is 'and acrost 'is mug, and 'e says, 'I suppose you couldn't spare a sup?' Well, I let 'im 'ave a drop, and 'e pretty nearly drained me. 'I'll tell you all about it,'

'e says. 'It's like this--like this 'ere. I'm a hartist, that's what I am--a profeshunal--yes. And I've got a hingagement to-night at one of the fust music-'alls in London--the very fust. I'm going to do my hextra speshul turn. It'll be worth to me every farden of 'arf-a-quid--yes. And now it's orf.' I says, ''Ow do yer make that out?' 'E pulls up the tails of 'is coat, ''Cause of them. Speaking, as it might be, as one hartist to another hartist, as a hartist, 'ow would you like to go on to do a hextra speshul turn in one of the fust music-'alls in London in them for trousers? And, mind you, mine's a drawin'-room entertainment, and no lies--that's what mine is. Yes, straight.' 'Well,' I says, 'I shouldn't.' 'E says, 'Of course you wouldn't; you couldn't. Why, they'd 'oot at yer. Yes. So I've got to chuck it.' I says, 'That's 'ard.' 'E says,' It is 'ard; it's bitter 'ard--cruel 'ard.' 'E leans agin the counter, and he takes 'old, casual like, of a pewter what belonged to a chap as was be'ind 'im, and 'e lifts it to 'is lips, as if 'e didn't know what 'e was a-doing of. But the chap as the pewter belonged to, 'e grabs 'old of it, and 'e says, 'Excuse me, who's a-payin'?' And this bloke says, seemin'

quite took aback-like, 'I beg your pardon, sir. It was a haccident.'

And the chap, 'e says, 'We'll call it a haccident,' and he drains the pewter right off, so as to make sure. And this 'ere bloke what I'm a-telling you of, he wipes his mouth agin, and he looks at me. But I wasn't a-taking any. So 'e says, 'And what makes it all the 'arder is what I'm going to tell yer--you bein' a friend o' mine.'"

"I thought you says 'e wasn't a friend o' yourn."

"More 'e wasn't. 'Ow could he be? Don't I tell yer I never saw 'im afore?"

"Well, 'e 'ad got a nerve, 'e 'ad. Some of 'em does 'ave."

"It was only 'is kid, you know. 'E says, 'I've got one of the finest pair of trousers there is in all England--straight, I have. 'Well,' I says, 'if I was you I'd put 'em on.' 'E says, 'They're spouted. I was just a-going to get 'em out when I come in 'ere.' 'Why don't you 'urry,' I says, 'and get 'em out?' 'I can't.' 'Why can't you?' 'Sold the ticket.' 'What for?' 'Tuppence.' 'Can't yer buy it agin?' ''Aven't got the tuppence.' 'I can't make you out,' I says. 'Fust yer say you're going to get your trousers out o' p.a.w.n, then yer say you've sold the ticket, then yer say you haven't got the tuppence to buy it back agin. Where do you think you're going to get the tuppence from?'

'E says, 'That's what I want to know. Where am I?' I says, ''Ow much is there on the trousers?' 'E says, 'Sevenpence.' 'What,' I says, 'sevenpence on the finest pair of trousers there is in all England!

They must be odd 'uns.' 'I might 'ave 'ad an 'eap o' money,' 'e says, 'an 'eap, but I didn't want it. That's where it was.' 'Was you in funds when you p.a.w.ned your trousers?' 'Of course I was.' I says, 'I don't see no of course about it.' 'E says, 'Where else was I to put 'em?'

"I says,' Wasn't there your legs? Was yer legs in p.a.w.n?' 'E says, 'That's different. I wasn't speakin' about that.' I says,' Well, then, I am.' 'E leans back agin the counter, and 'e looks up at the ceiling, and 'e says, 'Ninepence between me and fortune. Every farden of 'arfa-quid. Perhaps several 'arf-a-quids. If any lady or gentleman'--'e spoke like a reading book--'was to advance me the loan of ninepence for to enable me to clothe my legs with a pair of trousers as was suited to one of the fust music-'alls in London, and as would do credit to any hartist on the boards, I shall not cease for to remember the haction while the breath remains within my body. That is hall I 'ave to say. I say no more.' But 'e'd said enough. You should 'ave 'eard 'im--done yer good. Of course, that 'ushed the patter. No one wasn't going to say nothing after that. Not 'ardly.

Presently one woman says, 'I'll give a penny if anyone else will.'

This 'ere bloke took off 'is 'at. 'Madam, I thank you; as a hartist I thank you.' Then a lady what was with this other lady says, 'Susan, if you'll give a penny, I'll give a penny too.' Then this 'ere bloke's 'at come off again. Then there was a whip round. But it hung fire a bit. n.o.body didn't quite ketch on. So this 'ere other lady, she says, 'It seems 'ard that a man can't earn 'is daily bread 'cause he ain't got no trousers to earn it in, don't it, Susan?' And Susan says, 'It do seem hard.' And this 'ere bloke, 'e says, 'It's cruel 'ard.' Then one chap says, 'I'll give a pennyworth.' And another chap give a pennyworth. And presently there was the ninepence."

"Did you give a pennyworth?"

"Not me."