Peter Simple Part 27

"So we were at it for about half-an-hour, when our guns became so hot from quick firing, that they bounced up to the beams overhead, tearing away their ringbolts, and snapping the breechings like rope yarns. By this time we were almost as much unrigged as if we had been two days paying off in Portsmouth harbour. The four-decker forged ahead, and Troubridge, in the jolly old _Culloden_, came between us and two other Spanish s.h.i.+ps, who were playing into us. She was as fresh as a daisy, and gave them a dose which quite astonished them. They shook their ears, and fell astern, when the _Blenheim_ laid hold of them, and mauled them so that they went astern again. But it was out of the frying-pan into the fire: for the _Orion_, _Prince George_, and one or two others, were coming up, and knocked the very guts out of them. I'll be d.a.m.ned if they forgot the 14th of April, and sarve them right, too. Wasn't a four-decker enough for any two-decker, without any more coming on us?

and couldn't the beggars have matched themselves like gentlemen? Well, Mr Simple, this gave us a minute or two to fetch our breath, let the guns cool, and repair damages, and swab the blood from the decks; but we lost our four-decker, for we could not get near her again."

"What odd names the Spaniards give to their s.h.i.+ps, Swinburne!"

"Why, yes, they do; it would almost appear wicked to belabour the _Holy Trinity_ as we did. But why they should call a four-decked s.h.i.+p the _Holy Trinity_ I can't tell. Bill Saunders said that the fourth deck was for the Pope, who was as great a parsonage as the others: but I can't understand how that can be. Well, Mr Simple, as I was head-signalman, I was perched on the p.o.o.p, and didn't serve at a gun. I had to report all I could see, which was not much, the smoke was so thick; but now and then I could get a peep, as it were, through the holes in the blanket. Of course I was obliged to keep my eye as much as possible upon the admiral, not to make out his signals, for Commodore Nelson wouldn't thank me for that; I knew he hated a signal when in action, so I never took no notice of the bunting, but just watched to see what he was about. So while we are repairing damages, I'll just tell you what I saw of the rest of the fleet. As soon as old Jervis had done for the Spanish admiral, he hauled his wind on the larboard tack, and, followed by four or five other s.h.i.+ps, weathered the Spanish line and joined Collingwood in the _Excellent_. Then they all dashed through the line; the _Excellent_ was the leading s.h.i.+p, and she first took the s.h.i.+ne out of the _Salvador del Mondo_, and then left her to be picked up by the other s.h.i.+ps, while she attacked a two-decker, who hauled down her colours--I forget her name just now. As soon as the _Victory_ ran alongside of the _Salvador del Mondo_, down went her colours, and _Excellent_ reasons had she for striking her flag. And now, Mr Simple, the old _Captain_ comes into play again. Having parted company with the four-decker, we had recommenced action with the _San Nicolas_, a spanish eighty, and while we were hard at it, old Collingwood comes up in the _Excellent_. The _San Nicolas_, knowing that the _Excellent's_ broadside would send her to old Nick, put her helm up to avoid being raked: in so doing, she fell foul of the _San Josef_ a Spanish three-decker, and we being all cut to pieces, and unmanageable--all of us indeed reeling about like drunken men--Nelson ordered his helm a star-board, and in a jiffy there we were, all three hugging each other, running in one another's guns, smas.h.i.+ng our chain-plates, and poking our yard arms through each other's canvas.

"'All hands to board!' roared Nelson, leaping on the hammocks and waving his sword.

"'Hurrah! hurrah!' echoed through the decks, and up flew the men, like as [men] angry bees out of a bee-hive. In a moment pikes, tomahawks, cutla.s.ses, and pistols were seized (for it was quite unexpected, Mr Simple), and our men poured into the eighty-gun s.h.i.+p, and in two minutes the decks were cleared, and all the Dons pitched below. I joined the boarders and was on the main-deck when Captain Miller came down, and cried out, 'On deck again immediately.' Up we went, and what do you think it was for, Mr Simple? Why to board a second time; for Nelson having taken the two-decker, swore that he'd have the three-decker as well. So away we went again, clambering up her lofty sides how we could, and dropping down on her decks like hailstones. We all made for the quarter-deck, beat down every Spanish beggar that showed fight, and in five minutes more we had hauled down the colours of two of the finest s.h.i.+ps in the Spanish navy. If that wasn't taking the s.h.i.+ne out of the Dons, I should like to know what is. And didn't the old captains cheer and shake hands, as Commodore Nelson stood on the deck of the _San Josef_, and received the swords of the Spanish officers! There was enough of them to go right round the capstern, and plenty to spare.

Now, Mr Simple, what do you think of that for a spree?"

"Why, Swinburne, I can only say that I wish I had been there."

"So did every man in the fleet, Mr Simple, I can tell you."

"But what became of the _Santissima Trinidad_?"

"Upon my word, she behaved one _deck_ better than all the others. She held out against four of our s.h.i.+ps for a long while, and then hauled down her colours, and no disgrace to her, considering what a precious hammering she had taken first. But the lee division of the Spanish weather fleet, if I may so call it, consisting of eleven sail of the line, came up to her a.s.sistance, and surrounded her, so that they got her off. Our s.h.i.+ps were too much cut up to commence a new action, and the admiral made the signal to secure the prizes. The Spanish fleet then did what they should have done before--got into line; and we lost no time in doing the same. But we both had had fighting enough."

"But do you think, Swinburne, that the Spaniards fought well?"

"They'd have fought better, if they'd only have known how. There's no want of courage in the Dons, Mr Simple, but they did not support each other. Only observe how Troubridge supported us. By G.o.d, Mr Simple, he was the _real fellow_, and Nelson knew it well. He was Nelson's right-hand man; but you know there wasn't room for _two_ Nelsons. Their s.h.i.+ps engaged held out well, it must be acknowledged, but why wer'n't they all in their proper berths? Had they kept close order of sailing, and had all fought as well as those who were captured, it would not have been a very easy matter for fifteen s.h.i.+ps to gain a victory over twenty-six. That's long odds, even when backed by British seamen."

"Well, how did you separate?"

"Why, the next morning the Spaniards had the weather-gauge, so they had the option whether to fight or not. At one time they had half a mind, for they bore down to us; upon which we hauled our wind, to show them we were all ready to meet them, and then they thought better of it, and rounded-to again. So as they wouldn't fight, and we didn't wish it, we parted company in the night; and two days afterwards we anch.o.r.ed, with our four prizes, in Lagos Bay. So now you have the whole of it, Mr Simple, and I've talked till I'm quite hoa.r.s.e. You havn't by chance another drop of the stuff left to clear my throat? It would be quite a charity."

"I think I have, Swinburne; and as you deserve it, I will go and fetch it."

CHAPTER THIRTY SIX.

A LETTER FROM FATHER MCGRATH, WHO DIPLOMATISES--WHEN PRIEST MEETS PRIEST, THEN COMES THE TUG OF WAR--FATHER O'TOOLE NOT TO BE MADE A TOOL OF.

We continued our cruise for a fortnight, and then made sail for Jamaica, where we found the admiral at anchor at Port Royal: but our signal was made to keep under weigh, and Captain Kearney, having paid his respects to the admiral, received orders to carry despatches to Halifax. Water and provisions were sent on board by the boats of the admiral's s.h.i.+ps, and, to our great disappointment, as the evening closed in, we were again standing out to sea, instead of, as we had antic.i.p.ated, enjoying ourselves on sh.o.r.e; but the fact was, that orders had arrived from England to send a frigate immediately up to the admiral at Halifax, to be at his disposal.

I had, however, the satisfaction to know that Captain Kearney had been true to his word in making mention of my name in the despatch, for the clerk showed me a copy of it. Nothing occurred worth mentioning during our pa.s.sage, except that Captain Kearney was very unwell nearly the whole of the time, and seldom quitted his cabin. It was in October that we anch.o.r.ed in Halifax harbour, and the Admiralty, expecting our arrival there, had forwarded our letters. There were none for me, but there was one for O'Brien, from Father McGrath, the contents of which were as follows:--

"MY DEAR SON,--

"And a good son you are, and that's the truth on it, or devil a bit should you be a son of mine. You've made your family quite contented and peaceable and they never fight for the _praties_ now--good reason why they shouldn't, seeing that there's a plenty for all of them, and the pig craturs into the bargain. Your father and your mother, and your brother, and your three sisters, send their duty to you, and their blessings too--and you may add my blessing, Terence, which is worth them all; for won't I get you out of purgatory in the twinkling of a bed-post? Make yourself quite asy on that score, and lave it all to me; only just say a _pater_ now and then, that when St. Peter lets you in, he mayn't throw it in your teeth, that you've saved your soul by contract, which is the only way by which emperors and kings ever get to heaven. Your letter from Plymouth came safe to hand: Barney, the post-boy, having dropped it under foot close to our door, the big pig took it into his mouth and ran away with it; but I caught sight of him, and _speaking_ to him, he let it go, knowing (the 'cute cratur!) that I could read it better than him. As soon as I had digested the contents, which it was lucky the pig did not instead of me, I just took my meal and my big stick, and then set off for Ballycleuch.

"Now, you know, Terence, if you haven't forgot--and if you have, I'll just remind you--that there's a flaunty sort of young woman at the poteen shop there, who calls herself Mrs O'Rourke, wife to a corporal O'Rourke, who was kilt or died one day, I don't know which, but that's not of much consequence. The devil a bit do I think the priest ever gave the marriage-blessing to that same; although she swears that she was married on the rock of Gibraltar--it may be a strong rock fore I know, but it's not the rock of salvation like the seven sacraments, of which marriage is one. _Benedicite_! Mrs O'Rourke is a little too apt to fleer and jeer at the priests; and if it were not that she softens down her pertinent remarks with a gla.s.s or two of the real poteen, which proves some respect for the church, I'd excommunicate her body and soul, and everybody, and every soul that put their lips to the cratur at her door. But she must leave that off, as I tell her, when she gets old and ugly, for then all the whisky in the world shan't save her. But she's a fine woman now, and it goes agin my conscience to help the devil to a fine woman. Now this Mrs O'Rourke knows everybody and everything that's going on in the country about; and she has a tongue which has never had a holyday since it was let loose.

"'Good morning to ye, Mrs O'Rourke,' says I.

"'An' the top of the morning to you, Father McGrath,' says she, with a smile: 'what brings you here? Is it a journey that you're taking to buy the true wood of the cross; or is it a purty girl that you wish to confess, Father McGrath? or is it only that you're come for a drop of poteen, and a little bit of chat with Mrs O'Rourke?'

"'Sure it's I who'd be glad to find the same true wood of the cross, Mrs O'Rourke, but it's not grown, I suspect, at your town of Ballycleuch; and it's no objection I'd have to confess a purty girl like yourself, Mrs O'Rourke, who'll only tell me half her sins, and give me no trouble; but it's the truth, that I'm here for nothing else but to have a bit of chat with yourself, dainty dear, and taste your poteen, just by way of keeping my mouth nate and clane.'

"So Mrs O'Rourke poured out the real stuff, which I drank to her health; and then says I, putting down the bit of a gla.s.s, 'So you've a stranger come, I find, in your parts, Mrs O'Rourke.'

"'I've heard the same,' replied she. So you observe, Terence, I came to the fact all at once by a guess.

"'I'm tould,' says I, 'that he's a Scotchman, and spakes what n.o.body can understand.'

"'Devil a bit,' says she; 'he's an Englishman, and speaks plain enough.'

"'But what can a man mane, to come here and sit down all alone?' says I.

"'All alone, Father McGrath!' replied she: 'is a man all alone when he's got his wife and childer, and more coming, with the blessing of G.o.d?'

"'But those boys are not his own childer, I believe,' says I.

"'There again you're all in a mistake, Father McGrath,' rejoins she.

'The childer are all his own, and all girls to boot. It appears that it's just as well that you come down, now and then, for information, to our town of Ballycleuch.'

"'Very true, Mrs O'Rourke,' says I; 'and who is it that knows everything so well as yourself?' You observe, Terence, that I just said everything contrary and _vice versa_, as they call it, to the contents of your letter; for always recollect, my son, that if you would worm a secret out of a woman, you'll do more by contradiction than you ever will by coaxing--so I went on: 'Anyhow, I think it's a burning shame, Mrs O'Rourke, for a gentleman to bring over with him here from England a parcel of lazy English servants, when there's so many nice boys and girls here to attind upon them.'

"'Now there you're all wrong again, Father McGrath,' says she. 'Devil a soul has he brought from the other country, but has hired them all here.

Ain't there Ella Flanagan for one maid, and Terence Driscol for a footman? and it's well that he looks in his new uniform, when he comes down for the newspapers; and ar'n't Moggy Cala there to cook the dinner, and pretty Mary Sullivan for a nurse for the babby as soon as it comes into the world.'

"'Is it Mary Sullivan, you mane?' says I; 'she that was married about three months back, and is so quick in child-getting, that she's all but ready to fall to pieces in this same time?'

"'It's exactly she,' says Mrs O'Rourke; 'and do you know the reason?'

"'Devil a bit,' says I; 'how should _I_?'

"'Then it's just that she may send her own child away, and give her milk to the English babby that's coming; because the lady is too much of a lady to have a child hanging to her breast.'

"'But suppose Mary Sullivan's child ar'n't born till afterwards, how then?' says I. 'Speak, Mrs O'Rourke, for you're a sensible woman.'

"'How then?' says she. 'Och! that's all arranged; for Mary says that she'll be in bed a week before the lady, so that's all right, you'll perceive, Father McGrath.'

"'But don't you perceive, sensible woman as you are, that a young woman, who is so much out of her reckoning as to have a child three months after her marriage, may make a little mistake in her lying-in arithmetic, Mrs O'Rourke?'

"'Never fear, Father McGrath, Mary Sullivan will keep her word; and sooner than disappoint the lady, and lose her place, she'll just tumble downstairs, and won't that put her to bed fast enough?'

"'Well, that's what I call a faithful good servant that earns her wages,' says I; 'so now I'll just take another gla.s.s, Mrs O'Rourke, and thank you too. Sure you're the woman that knows everything, and a mighty pretty woman into the bargain.'

"'Let me alone now, Father McGrath, and don't be pinching me that way anyhow.'

"'It was only a big flea that I perceived hopping on your gown, my darling, devil anything else.'

"'Many thanks to you, father, for that same; but the next time you'd kill my fleas, just wait until they're in a _more dacent_ situation.'

"'Fleas are fleas, Mrs O'Rourke, and we must catch 'em when we can, and how we can, and as we can, so no offence. A good night's rest to you, Mrs O'Rourke--when do you mean to confess?'