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"Please call me Ca.s.silda. I don't like to be so formal."
"If that's what you wish to be called, of course... Ca.s.silda." Camilla couldn't be very far from her own age, she guessed. Despite the old-fas.h.i.+oned maid's outfit-black dress and stockings with frilled white ap.r.o.n and cap-the other girl was probably no more than in her early twenties. The maid wore her long blonde hair in an upswept topknot like her mistress, and she supposed she only followed Mrs Castaigne's preferences. Camilla's figure was full-much more buxom than her own boyish slenderness-and her cinch-waisted costume accented this. Her eyes were a bright blue, s.h.i.+ning above a straight nose and wide-mouthed face.
"You've hurt yourself." Camilla ran her fingers tenderly along the bruises that marred her ribs and legs.
"There was a struggle. And I fell in the darkness-I don't know how many times."
"And you've cut yourself." Camilla lifted the other girl's black hair away from her neck. "Here on your shoulders and throat. But I don't believe it's anything to worry about." Her fingers carefully touched the livid sc.r.a.pes. "Are you certain there isn't someone whom we should let know of your safe whereabouts?"
"There is no one who would care. I am alone."
"Poor Ca.s.silda."
"All I want is to sleep," she murmured. The warm bath was easing the ache from her flesh, leaving her deliciously sleepy.
Camilla left her, to return with large towels. The maid helped her from the tub, wrapping her in one towel as she dried her with another. She felt faint with drowsiness, allowed herself to relax against the blonde girl. Camilla was very strong, supporting her easily as she towelled her small b.r.e.a.s.t.s. Camilla's fingers found the parting of her thighs, lingered, then returned again in a less than casual touch.
Her dark eyes were wide as she stared into Camilla's luminous blue gaze, but she felt too pleasurably relaxed to object when the maid's touch became more intimate. Her breath caught, and held.
"You're very warm, Ca.s.silda."
"Hurry, Camilla." Mrs Castaigne spoke from the doorway. "The poor child is about to drop. Help her into her nightdress."
Past wondering, she lifted her arms to let Camilla drape the beribboned lawn nightdress over her head and to her ankles. In another moment she was being ushered into a bedroom, furnished in the fas.h.i.+on of the rest of the house, and to an ornate bra.s.s bed whose mattress swallowed her up like a wave of foam. She felt the quilts drawn over her, sensed their presence hovering over her, and then she slipped into a deep sleep of utter exhaustion.
"Is there no one?"
"Nothing at all."
"Of course. How else could she be here? She is ours."
Her dreams were troubled by formless fears- deeply disturbing as experienced, yet their substance was already forgotten when she awoke at length on the echo of her outcry. She stared about her anxiously, uncertain where she was. Her disorientation was the same as when she awakened after receiving shock, only this place wasn't a ward, and the woman who entered the room wasn't one of her wardens.
"Good morning, Ca.s.silda." The maid drew back the curtains to let long shadows streak across the room. "I should say, good evening, as it's almost that time. You've slept throughout the day, poor dear."
Ca.s.silda? Yes, that was she. Memory came tumbling back in a confused jumble, She raised herself from her pillows and looked about the bedchamber she had been too tired to examine before. It was distinctly a woman's room-a young woman's-and she remembered that it had been Mrs Castaigne's daughter's room. It scarcely seemed to have been unused for very long: the bra.s.s bed was brightly polished, the walnut of the wardrobe, the chests of drawers and the dressing table made a rich glow, and the gay pastels of the curtains and wallpaper offset the gravity of the high tinned ceiling and parquetry floor. Small oriental rugs and pillows upon the chairs and chaise longue made bright points of color. Again she thought of a movie set, for the room was altogether lacking in anything modern. She knew very little about antiques, but she guessed that the style of furnis.h.i.+ngs must go back before the First World War.
Camilla was arranging a single red rose in a crystal bud vase upon the dressing table. She caught her gaze in the mirror. "Did you sleep well, Ca.s.silda? I thought I heard you cry out, just as I knocked."
"A bad dream, I suppose. But I slept well. I don't, usually." They had made her take pills to sleep.
"Are you awake, Ca.s.silda? I thought I heard your voices." Mrs Castaigne smiled from the doorway and crossed to her bed. She was dressed much the same as the night before.
"I didn't mean to sleep so long," she apologized.
"Poor child! I shouldn't wonder that you slept so, after your dreadful ordeal. Do you feel strong enough to take a little soup?"
"I really must be going. I can't impose any further."
"I won't hear anymore of that, my dear. Of course you'll stay with us until you're feeling stronger." Mrs Castaigne sat beside her on the bed, placed a cold hand against her brow. "Why, Ca.s.silda, your face is simply aglow. I do hope you haven't taken a fever. Look, your hands are positively trembling!"
"I feel all right." In fact, she did not. She did feel as if she were running a fever, and her muscles were so sore that she wasn't sure she could walk. The trembling didn't concern her: the injections they gave her every two weeks made her shake, so they gave her little pills to stop the shaking. Now she didn't have those pills, but since it was time again for another shot, the injection and its side effects would soon wear off.
"I'm going to bring you some tonic, dear. And Camilla will bring you some good nouris.h.i.+ng soup, which you must try to take. Poor Ca.s.silda, if we don't nurse you carefully, I'm afraid you may fall dangerously ill."
"But I can't be such a nuisance to you," she protested, as a matter of form. "I really must be going."
"Where to, dear child?" Mrs Castaigne held her hands gravely.
"Have you someplace else to go? Is there someone you wish us to inform of your safety?"
"No," she admitted, trying to make everything sound right. "I've no place to go; there's no one who matters. I was on my way down the coast, hoping to find a job during the resort season. I know one or two old girlfriends who could put me up until I get settled."
"See there. Then there's no earthly reason why you can't just stay here until you're feeling strong again. Why, perhaps I might find a position for you myself. But we shall discuss these things later, when you're feeling well. For the moment, just settle back on your pillow and let us help you get well."
Mrs Castaigne bent over her, kissed her on the forehead. Her lips were cool. "How lovely you are, Ca.s.silda," she smiled, patting her hand.
She smiled back, and returned the other woman's firm grip. She'd seen no sign of a television or radio here, and an old eccentric like Mrs Castaigne probably didn't even read the newspapers. Even if Mrs Castaigne had heard about the bus wreck, she plainly was too overjoyed at having a visitor to break her lonely routine to concern herself with a possible escapee-a.s.suming they hadn't just listed her as drowned. She couldn't have hoped for a better place to hide out until things cooled off.
The tonic had a bitter licorice taste and made her drowsy, so that she fell asleep not long after Camilla carried away her tray. Despite her long sleep throughout that day, fever and exhaustion drew her back down again-although her previous sleep robbed this one of restful oblivion. Again came troubled dreams, this time cutting more harshly into her consciousness.
She dreamed of Dr Archer-her stern face and mannish shoulders craning over her bed. Her wrists and ankles were fixed to each corner of the bed by padded leather cuffs. Dr Archer was speaking to her in a scolding tone, while her wardens were pulling up her skirt, dragging down her panties. A syringe gleamed in Dr Archer's hand, and there was a sharp stinging in her b.u.t.tock.
She was struggling again, but to no avail. Dr Archer was shouting at her, and a stout nurse was tightening the last few buckles of the straitjacket that bound her arms to her chest in a loveless hug. The straps were so tight she could hardly draw breath, and while she could not understand what Dr Archer was saying, she recognized the spurting needle that Dr Archer thrust into her.
She was strapped tightly to the narrow bed, her eyes staring at the grey ceiling as they wheeled her through the corridors to Dr Archer's special room. Then they stopped; they were there, and Dr Archer was bending over her again. Then came the sting in her arm as they penetrated her veins, the helpless headlong rush of the drug-and Dr Archer smiles and turns to her machine, and the current blasts into her tightly strapped skirt and her body arches and strains against the restraints and her scream, strangles against the rubber gag clenched in her teeth.
But the face that looks into hers now is not Dr Archer's, and the hands that shake her are not cruel.
"Ca.s.silda! Ca.s.silda! Wake up! It's only a nightmare!"
Camilla's blonde-and-blue face finally focused into her awakening vision.
"Only a nightmare," Camilla rea.s.sured her. "Poor darling." The hands that held her shoulders lifted to smooth her black hair from her eyes, to cup her face. Camilla bent over her, kissed her gently on her dry lips.
"What is it? " Mrs Castaigne, wearing her nightdress and carrying a candle, came anxiously into the room.
"Poor Ca.s.silda has had bad dreams," Camilla told her. "And her face feels ever so warm."
"Dear child!" Mrs Castaigne set down her candlestick. "She must take some more tonic at once. Perhaps you should sit with her, Camilla, to see that her sleep is untroubled."
"Certainly, madame. I'll just fetch the tonic."
"Please, don't bother..." But the room became a vertiginous blur as she tried to sit up. She slumped back and closed her eyes tightly for a moment. Her body did feel feverish, her mouth dry, and the trembling when she moved her hand to take the medicine gla.s.s was so obvious that Camilla shook her head and held the gla.s.s to her lips herself. She swallowed dutifully, wondering how much of this was a reaction to the Prolixin still in her flesh. The injection would soon be wearing off, she knew, for when she smiled back at her nurses, the sharp edges of color were beginning to show once again through the haze the medication drew over her perception.
"I'll be all right soon," she promised them.
"Then do try to sleep, darling." Mrs Castaigne patted her arm. "You must regain your strength. Camilla will be here to watch over you.
"Be certain that the curtains are drawn against any night vapors," she directed her maid. "Call me, if necessary."
"Of course, madame. I'll not leave her side."
She was dreaming again-or dreaming still.
Darkness surrounded her like a black leather mask, and her body shook with uncontrollable spasms. Her naked flesh was slick with chill sweat, although her mouth was burning dry. She moaned and tossed-striving to awaken order from out of the damp blackness, but the blackness only embraced her with smothering tenacity.
Cold lips were crus.h.i.+ng her own, thrusting a cold tongue into her feverish mouth, bruising the skin of her throat. Fingers, slender and strong, caressed her b.r.e.a.s.t.s, held her nipples to hungry lips. Her hands thrashed about, touched smooth flesh. It came to her that her eyes were indeed wide open, that the darkness was so profound she could no more than sense the presence of other shapes close beside her.
Her own movements were languid, dreamlike. Through the spasms that racked her flesh, she became aware of a perverse thrill of ecstasy. Her fingers brushed somnolently against the cool flesh that crouched over her, with no more purpose or strength than the drifting limbs of a drowning victim.
A compelling la.s.situde bound her, even as the blackness blinded her. She seemed to be drifting away, apart from her body, apart from her dream, into deeper, even deeper darkness. The sensual arousal that lashed her lost reality against the lethargy and fever that held her physically, and rising out of the eroticism of her delirium shrilled whispers of underlying revulsion and terror.
One pair of lips imprisoned her mouth and throat now, sucking at her breath, while other lips crept down across her b.r.e.a.s.t.s, hovered upon her navel, then pounced upon the opening of her thighs. Her breath caught in a shudder, was sucked away by the lips that held her mouth, as the coldness began to creep into her burning flesh.
She felt herself smothering, unable to draw breath, so that her body arched in panic, her limbs thrashed aimlessly. Her efforts to break away were as ineffectual as was her struggle to awaken. The lips that stole her breath released her, but only for a moment. In the darkness she felt other flesh pinion her tossing body, move against her with cool strength. Chill fire tormented her loins, and as she opened her mouth to cry out, or to sigh, smooth thighs pressed down onto her cheeks, and coldness gripped her breath. Mutely, she obeyed the needs that commanded her, that overwhelmed her, and through the darkness blindly flowed her silent scream of ecstasy and of horror.
Ca.s.silda awoke.
Sunlight spiked into her room-the colored panes creating a false prism effect. Camilla, who had been adjusting the curtains, turned and smiled at the sound of her movement.
"Good morning, Ca.s.silda. Are you feeling better this morning?"
"A great deal better." Ca.s.silda returned her smile. "I feel as if I'd slept for days." She frowned slightly, suddenly uncertain.
Camilla touched her forehead. "Your fever has left you; Mrs Castaigne will be delighted to learn that. You've slept away most of yesterday and all through last night. Shall I bring your breakfast tray now?"
"Please-I'm famished. But I really think I should be getting up."
"After breakfast, if you wish. And now I'll inform madame that you're feeling much better."
Mrs Castaigne appeared as the maid was clearing away the breakfast things. "How very much better you look today, Ca.s.silda. Camilla tells me you feel well enough to sit up."
"I really can't play the invalid and continue to impose upon your hospitality any longer. Would it be possible that you might lend me some clothing? My own garments..." Ca.s.silda frowned, trying to remember why she had burst in on her benefactress virtually naked.
"Certainly, my dear." Mrs Castaigne squeezed her shoulder. "You must see if some of my daughter's garments won't fit you. You cannot be very different in size from Constance, I'm certain. Camilla will a.s.sist you."
She was light-headed when first she tried to stand, but Ca.s.silda clung to the bra.s.s bedposts until her legs felt strong enough to hold her. The maid was busying herself at the chest of drawers, removing items of clothing from beneath neat coverings of tissue paper. A faint odor of dried rose petals drifted from a sachet beneath the folded garments.
"I do hope you'll overlook it if these are not of the latest mode," Mrs Castaigne was saying. "It has been some time since Constance was with us here."
"Your daughter is...?"
"Away."
Ca.s.silda declined to intrude further. There was a dressing screen behind which she retired, while Mrs Castaigne waited upon the chaise longue. Trailing a scent of dried roses from the garments she carried, Camilla joined her behind the screen and helped her out of her nightdress.
There were undergarments of fine silk, airy lace and gauzy pastels. Ca.s.silda found herself puzzled, both from their unfamiliarity and at the same time their familiarity, and while her thoughts struggled with the mystery, her hands seemed to dress her body with practiced movements. First the chemise, knee-length and trimmed with light lace and ribbons. Seated upon a chair, she drew on pale stockings of patterned silk, held at midthigh by beribboned garters. Then silk knickers, open front and back and tied at the waist, trimmed with lace and niching where they flared below her stocking tops. A frilled petticoat fell almost to her ankles.
"I won't need that," Ca.s.silda protested. Camilla had presented her with a boned corset of white-and-sky broche.
"Nonsense, my dear," Mrs Castaigne directed, coming around the dressing screen to oversee. "You may think of me as old-fas.h.i.+oned, but I insist that you not ruin your figure."
Ca.s.silda submitted, suddenly wondering why she had thought anything out of the ordinary about it. She hooked the straight busk together in front, while Camilla gathered the laces at the back. The maid tugged sharply at the laces, squeezing out her breath. Ca.s.silda bent forward and steadied herself against the back of the chair, as Camilla braced a knee against the small of her back, pulling the laces as tight as possible before tying them. Once her corset was secured, she drew over it a camisole of white cotton lace trimmed with ribbon, matching her petticoat. Somewhat dizzy, Ca.s.silda sat stiffly before the dressing table, while the maid brushed out her long black hair and gathered it in a loose knot atop her head, pinning it in place with tortoise-sh.e.l.l combs. Opening the wardrobe, Camilla found her a pair of shoes with high heels that mushroomed outward at the bottom, which fit her easily.
"How lovely, Ca.s.silda!" Mrs Castaigne approved. "One would scarcely recognize you as the poor drowned thing that came out of the night!"
Ca.s.silda stood up and examined herself in the full-length dressing mirror. It was as if she looked upon a stranger, and yet she knew she looked upon herself. The corset constricted her waist and forced her slight figure into an "S" curve-hips back, bust forward- imparting an unexpected opulence, further enhanced by the gauzy profusion of lace and silk. Her face, dark-eyed and finely boned, returned her gaze watchfully from beneath a l.u.s.trous pile of black hair. She touched herself, almost in wonder, almost believing that the reflection in the mirror was a photograph of someone else.
Camilla selected for her a long-sleeved linen s.h.i.+rtwaist, b.u.t.toned at the cuffs and all the way to her throat, then helped her into a skirt of some darker material that fell away from her cinched waist to her ankles. Ca.s.silda studied herself in the mirror, while the maid fussed about her.
I look like someone in an old ill.u.s.tration-a Gibson girl, she thought, then puzzled at her thought.
Through the open window she could hear the vague noises of the city, and for the first time she realized that intermingled with these familiar sounds was the clatter of horses' hooves upon the brick pavement.
"You simply must not say anything more about leaving us, Ca.s.silda," Mrs, Castaigne insisted, laying a hand upon the girl's knee as she leaned toward her confidentially.
Beside her on the settee, Ca.s.silda felt the pressure of her touch through the rustling layers of petticoat. It haunted her, this flowing whisper of sound that came with her every movement, for it seemed at once strange and again familiar-a s.h.i.+very sigh of silk against silk, like the whisk of dry snow sliding across stone. She smiled, holding her teacup with automatic poise, and wondered that such little, commonplace sensations should seem at all out of the ordinary to her. Even the rigid embrace of her corset seemed quite familiar to her now, so that she sat gracefully at ease, listening to her benefactress, while a part of her thoughts stirred in uneasy wonder.
"You have said yourself that you have no immediate prospects," Mrs Castaigne continued. "I shouldn't have to remind you of the dangers the city holds for unattached young women. You were extremely fortunate in your escape from those white slavers who had abducted you. Without family or friends to question your disappearance-well, I shan't suggest what horrible fate awaited you."
Ca.s.silda s.h.i.+vered at the memory of her escape-a memory as formless and uncertain, beyond her need to escape, as that of her life prior to her abduction. She had made only vague replies to Mrs Castaigne's gentle questioning, nor was she at all certain which fragments of her story were half-truths, or lies.
Of one thing she was certain beyond all doubt: the danger from which she had fled awaited her beyond the shelter of this house.
"It has been so lonely here since Constance went away," Mrs Castaigne was saying. "Camilla is a great comfort to me, but nonetheless she has her household duties to occupy her, and I have often considered engaging a companion. I should be only too happy if you would consent to remain with us in this position-at least for the present time."
"You're much too kind! Of course I'll stay."
"I promise you that your duties shall be no more onerous than to provide amus.e.m.e.nts for a rather old-fas.h.i.+oned lady of retiring disposition. I hope it won't prove too dull for you, my dear."
"It suits my own temperament perfectly," Ca.s.silda a.s.sured her. "I am thoroughly content to follow quiet pursuits within doors."
"Wonderful!" Mrs Castaigne took her hands. "Then it's settled. I know Camilla will be delighted to have another young spirit about the place. And you may relieve her of some of her tasks."
"What shall I do?" Ca.s.silda begged her, overjoyed at her good fortune.
"Would you read to me, please, my dear? I find it so relaxing to the body and so stimulating to the mind. I've taken up far too much of Camilla's time from her ch.o.r.es, having her read to me for hours on end."
"Of course." Ca.s.silda returned Camilla's smile as she entered the sitting room to collect the tea things. From her delight, it was evident that the maid had been listening from the hallway. "What would you like for me to read to you?"
"That book over there beneath the lamp." Mrs Castaigne indicated a volume bound in yellow cloth. "It is a recent drama-and a most curious work, as you shall quickly see. Camilla was reading it to me on the night you came to us."
Taking up the book, Ca.s.silda again experienced a strange sense of unaccountable deja vu, and she wondered where she might previously have read The King in Yellow, if indeed she ever had.
"I believe we are ready to begin the second act," Mrs Castaigne told her.
Ca.s.silda was reading in bed when Camilla knocked tentatively at her door. She set aside her book with an almost furtive movement.