Glitch. Part 23

And at the very back of this ruined pub, I saw Laurent and Amrith, eating with a hobo from a plate of pizza that bordered on medical malpractice.

Josh and Lena led me over to the table. Laurent and Amrith stood up as we approached.

"Made it safely?" Laurent asked.

"Had a close call." Lena said. She pulled out the chair opposite Amrith and sat down. "Also I totally got the handstand right this time." Amrith nodded in approval.

"This is the guy," Laurent said to the homeless guy. He c.o.c.ked his head at me.

The hobo sat between Laurent and Amrith, and probably had some kind of crazy. He wore his hair long, flat-ironed, and held back in a ponytail. He had a beard. It shot from his chin at a thirty-degree angle, and was flecked with pizza grease and dots of fried batter. He sported a camouflage jacket, with pockets arranged like a Mao suit.

The homeless guy slowly masticated the last bits of a pizza slice. He moved his mouth in a slow rotation, like a horse going over gra.s.s. He swallowed, picked something out his teeth with a crusty white fingernail, and grunted at me. "Name's Haze."

This was Haze?

I don't know what I'd expected of the man who'd discovered Level Zero, the man who was purported to have the wisdom I needed to save myself from the Stalker Man, and my blue eyes, that still haunted my reflection. But for the discoverer of a new plane of existence.

More than derelict. Haze had the short, choppy movements of a paranoid, or a former addict. The wide, rolling eyes of a madman. If he'd asked me for a dollar on the street, I'd give him one out of pity.

Josh took the seat in front of Laurent, and I reluctantly sat down in the middle, right opposite Haze.

"Hear you've got a problem with a Stalker Man," Haze muttered. "Heard Josh didn't seal a gate."

Josh observed the floor.

"Always seal your gates," Haze said. He held a fist over his mouth and belted out a hacking, smoker's cough.

A s.h.i.+ning pizza sat in the centre of the table on a sheet of grease-soaked cardboard. From all appearances, it had started life as a normal c.r.a.ppy pizza. But then some enterprising soul had poured nacho cheese, chilli, and tortillas on top of it. In addition, a few wilted california rolls lined the edges of the soggy crust. The beads of rice inside were stained saffron orange.

Haze wiped his beard with the back of his hand, and gestured for me to eat. I shook my head. He shrugged, and grabbed another slice. A california roll rolled off and bounced onto the table. He s.n.a.t.c.hed the roll and popped it in his mouth.

He ate for a bit. The others ate as well. I smelled beer, and wondered if I could get some-but no waiters came out.

Out of nowhere, Haze slammed his fist on the table. The cutlery rattled.

"Stalker Men are no joke!" Haze shouted. "They're dangerous."

The outburst didn't effect the others. They went on eating.

"You're in s.h.i.+t now," Haze lowered his voice. He leaned in close so I could see the follicles of his beard and the big, black-head dimples on his nose. He smelled of nacho cheese. "But we're going to teach you how to survive. Do you know what you have to do?"

I shook my head.

Haze slammed a second palm on the table. The cheese wobbled on the pizza. "You've gotta go down! You've gotta go down there like Captain Ahab. You've gotta find your soul-item."

Haze backed off. He leaned back in his chair and looked up to the ceiling where a single light flickered above us. I saw dust floating in the light, like flowers in Level Zero.

"A Stalker Man," Haze began quietly, "takes a bit of you out to put a bit of it in. You just gotta find that bit he hid away, then you'll be whole again."

Laurent, Amrith and Lena looked at Haze like he was a G.o.d. Josh fumed into his food.

"Gary Weiss," Haze announced. He looked at all of us. "The first human to discover the Shadow Place, what he called the Jung Field and what you call Level Zero."

Josh coughed. He took out a blue Bic pen from his hoodie, pulled back the sleeve of his left arm. He started writing on his wrist.

Haze was staring at me. I looked away from Josh.

"A soul item," Haze continued, "will take many forms. Gary Weiss told me this; he is the only one to fight a stalker man and win. No easy answers here-just go down, find your Soul Item, and make yourself whole. Then run the f.u.c.k away. It's simple."

It sounded simple.

"Just find your soul-item and everything will be okay." Haze said. "This is something my master taught me."

Josh kicked my foot. I held back from punching the guy and looked over at him.

He held out his arm under the table. He'd written a message in blue ink on his arm, in big, capital letters.

HAZE IS AN a.s.s-IF YOU WANT TO LIVE LISTEN TO ME Haze curled his lip, oblivious to the secret message. "Name it after some video game. In the eighties I was a student, and a local geophysics company-"

I nodded, too shocked to do anything else. My limit for random, crazy s.h.i.+t was near the breaking point already. I wanted to go home. I had a nice weekend lined up.

And on top of that, I was getting worried about something. It was probably nothing, but I'd checked my watch when we left Level Zero. Something wasn't right.

We'd entered Level Zero at roughly three o'clock.

We'd come out at five thirty.

The way I remembered it, we'd been inside for ten minutes tops.

There was no way to tell what Level Zero did with time. I'd decided to not notice. No point in worrying. But still, it bugged me.

And what had Josh said earlier about a Stalker Man?

I reached out and took a slice of pizza. It tasted like it looked-bad. The cheese burned my sinuses with a smell like burning plastic.

"Good man," Haze muttered.

"Need a beer too," I said.

"You're driving us back." Josh said.

"f.u.c.k you."

Haze took the last slice of pizza and crammed it in his mouth. Nacho cheese dribbled down the corners of his mouth. He wiped the orange streams with a rough, brown napkin-the kind from public bathrooms. "Anyway, got it? Go down to Level Zero. Stay there until you find your Soul Item. Don't let the Stalker Man get you."

"And there's one more thing." Haze said quietly.

During Haze's speech, the others had freely talked, eaten and drank. But now, they settled down. Laurent stared into his beer. Amrith and Lena looked right at me. Josh twisted his lip and slowly, slowly shook his head; he tapped his bare arm again, and tugged his sleeve back down to cover up the message.

"You can't come near us again," Haze told me. "It's too dangerous."

What?

A tall, red-neck looking guy with a white wife-beater and a Hulk Hogan moustache came out from the kitchen.

"You guys alright?" He asked.

"We're fine." Haze rumbled.

The Hulk wannabe disappeared back into the kitchen, whistling to the jazz in the air.

"It's too dangerous for us to see you any more," Haze said. "h.e.l.l, this bunch have already risked their lives. After this, you're on your own."

And now everybody was staring at their feet.

"Anyway kids," Haze pushed himself up. The blocky, wooden chair creaked beneath him. "I'd better go see the wife. Nice meeting you Sam. Good luck."

Haze tossed some bills on the table. He kicked his chair away and headed out. He pa.s.sed me as he went for the door. The smell of beer and cigarette smoke rolled off him.

Laurent waited until Haze left the door. When the door thunked shut, he grabbed an empty water bottle and poured the remains of his beer into it. He stuck the beet into his jacket pocket, and left.

"Sorry Sam," Lena murmured, avoiding eye contact. She and Amrith got up. Amrith came around and patted my shoulder. His hand was warm, comforting, strong-traitor.

Lena and Amrith left together. I didn't watch them go.

That was it?

Josh tapped my shoulder. "You're taking me to York Mills and Bayview."

"Sure." I said as we stood up.

Josh checked his wallet. "I want ice cream. We'll get ice cream along the way."

"Pull up there."

Josh pointed out a strip mall coming up on the road. It sat buried behind tall gra.s.s and a set of traffic lights that weren't lighting. A single shop-a 24/7 convenience store with a fluorescent orange sign-shone on the dark row.

A red OPEN sign hung slanted in the door.

I made an illegal turn through the empty street, and pulled into the strip's lot.

I pulled the car to a stop and cranked up the parking brake.

"What do you want?" Josh asked. He pulled out his wallet. In the dark, I could see his hands best; a band of light fell across them as he pulled out a twenty. I remembered I'd paid 150 for cab fare.

"I'm good," I said, undoing my seatbelt.

"I'm offering you free ice cream." Josh said. He pulled open his door and stepped outside. Cold air brushed my shoulder.

"Chocolate."

"Fine. Let's go." Josh kicked his door shut. I was going to punch that kid some day. Again. my car did not suffer door-kicking gladly.

I got out of the car. The cold wrapped around me and I hunched my shoulders. Crickets creaked in the uncut gra.s.s in front of the lot, and Canada geese honked in the distance. Josh's sneakers clip-clopped the pavement.

Josh was almost at the store-a shadow in the sterile light.

I had to tell Josh about the time skip, I decided. Not because I was worried, but because it was strange. I had to learn about Level Zero.

Especially now that I had to go down there alone.

I breathed in the cold air. Josh entered store door open. A bell rang inside.

I gave up on being warm. Instead, I unb.u.t.toned my dress s.h.i.+rt and let the cold in. I s.h.i.+fted, and adjusted my pants. My khakis were chafing my man-areas. I'd grown to hate them; they made me feel like I was working. TGIF.

I headed over to the store. In the steel-barred window, Josh pushed two ice cream sandwich-things over the counter. The cas.h.i.+er rang it up and threw a blue five-dollar note down. Josh picked up the snacks, swept up the bill, and came back out.

"This one has caramel in it," Josh said as he opened the door, ringing the store's bell. He handed me a popsicle.

I took the snack from Josh. It was encased in red and brown packaging with a picture of a dancing cow, the word MAGNUM written in red bubble letters on the side. The fudgesicle burned a cold rectangle in my hand.

Josh unwrapped his own thing-a white and red swirly tube that smelled of lemon. He bit off a chunk and chewed. Good way to get an ice cream headache.

I unwrapped the Magnum. It was a rocket-s.h.i.+p shaped stick of fudge about the size of a child's arm. I sc.r.a.ped the top off with my teeth and balled up the wrapper in my free hand.

"Haze is wrong." Josh said when he finished chewing. "I don't think going down into Level Zero will do anything to help you."

I hadn't been impressed by Haze, but then I wasn't that impressed by Josh either. I just nodded.

"I don't know that much about the Stalker Men," Josh said. Admitting it made his perma-scowl deepen. "But I've never heard Haze talk about bulls.h.i.+t soul items."