A Select Collection of Old English Plays Volume Xi Part 38

[119] The concluding thought of this pretty song has been in request by many poets of all countries: Eustachio Manfredi has carried it to an extreme that would seem merely absurd, but for the grace of the expression of his sonnet, _Il primo albor non appariva ancora_.

Appended to "The Fatal Dowry" is "a dialogue between a man and a woman" which commences with it, and which we may therefore a.s.sign to Field.

[120] [An allusion to the proverb.]

[121] _Man_ omitted in the second edit.

[122] Flog him.

[123] [Edits., _you_. _Welltried_.]

[124] [Edits., _meant_.]

[125] [These lines appear to be taken from some song of "Little Boy Blue."]

[126] This pa.s.sage has been adduced by Dr Farmer to show that Falstaff was originally called by Shakespeare _Oldcastle_, according to the tradition mentioned by Rowe, and supported by Fuller in his "Worthies," and by other authorities. The point is argued at great length in Malone's Shakespeare by Boswell, xvi. 410, _et seq._, and the decisions of the learned have been various; but the balance of evidence is undoubtedly in favour of the opinion that Shakespeare made the change, perhaps to avoid the confusion of his very original character with the mere fat buffoon of the old play of "Henry V.," a point not adverted to in the discussion. Field's testimony seems tolerably decisive.

[127] Citizens and apprentices were called in derision _flatcaps_ and _what-d'ye-lacks_ in reference to their dress and occupation.

[128] [Edits., _fair shop and wife_.]

[129] [_i.e._, a servant.]

[130] _Will satisfy all men_, in the second edition.

[131] [Edits., _means it_.]

ACT V., SCENE I.

_Enter_ SUBTLE, _with_ HUSBAND.

SUB. She is not to be cast.

HUS. It cannot be: Had you a wife, and I were in your case, I would be hang'd even at the chamber-door, Where I attempted, but I'd lay her flat.

SUB. Why, tell me truly, would it please you best, To have her remain chaste or conquered?

HUS. O friend, it would do me good at the heart To have her overcome: she does so brag, And stand upon her chast.i.ty, forsooth.

SUB. Why, then, in plain terms, sir, the fort is mine: Your wife has yielded; _up-tails_ is her song.

The deed is done. Come now, be merry, man.

HUS. Is the deed done indeed? Come, come, you jest.

Has my wife yielded? is _up-tails_ her song?

Faith, come to[132] prose: how got you to the matter first, ha?

Pis.h.!.+ you are so bashful now----

SUB. Why, by my troth, I'll tell you, because you are my friend; otherwise you must note, it is a great hurt to the art of wh.o.r.emastery to discover; besides, the skill was never mine o' th' price.

HUS. Very good; on, sir.

SUB. At the first she was horrible stiff against me; then, sir, I took her by the hand, which I kissed.

HUS. Good, sir.

SUB. And I called her pretty rogue, and I thrust my finger betwixt her b.r.e.a.s.t.s, and I made lips. At last, I pulled her by the chin to me, and I kissed her.

HUS. Hum!--very good.

SUB. So at the first she kissed very strangely, close and untoward. Then said I to her, think but upon the wrongs, the intolerable wrongs, the rogue your husband does you.

HUS. Ay, that was very good: what said she to you then, sir?

SUB. Nay, I went on. First, quoth I, think how he hath used you--left you no means, given all your clothes to his punks; struck you, turned your grey eyes into black ones, but yet----

HUS. A pretty conceit!

SUB. Quoth I, these things are nothing in the rascal: think but what a base wh.o.r.emaster the rascal is.

HUS. Did you call me rascal so often, are you sure?

SUB. Yes, and oftener; for, said I, none comes amiss to the rogue. I have known him, quoth I, do three lousy beggars under hedges in the riding of ten mile, and I swore this too.

HUS. 'Twas very well; but you did lie. On, pray.

SUB. Pis.h.!.+ one must lie a little. Now, sir, by this time she began to kiss somewhat more openly and familiarly, her resistance began to slacken, and my a.s.sault began to stiffen. The more her bulwark decayed, the more my battery fortified. At last, sir, a little fumbling being pa.s.sed to make the conquest more difficult, she perceiving my artillery[133] mounted, falls me flat upon her back, cries me out aloud--

Alas! I yield. Use me not roughly, friend; My fort that, like Troy town, ten years hath stood Besieg'd and shot at, did remain unwon; But now 'tis conquer'd. So the deed was done.

HUS. Then came the hottest service. Forward with your tale, sir.

SUB. Nay,

_Caetera quis nescit? la.s.si requievimus ambo: Proveniant medii sic mihi saepe dies_.[134]

HUS. Which is as much as to say I am a cuckold in all languages! But sure, 'tis not so? it is impossible my wife should yield.

SUB. Heyday! ev'n now it was impossible she should hold out, and now it is impossible she should yield. Stay you but here, and be an ear-witness to what follows. I'll fetch your wife. [_Aside._] I know he will not stay.

[_Exit._

HUS. Good faith, sir, but he will.

I do suspect some knavery in this.

Here will I hide myself; when thought as gone, If they do ought unfitting, I will call Witness, and straightway sue [for] a divorce. [_Aside. Exit._