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The Spectator Volume Iii Part 10

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'Nec duo sunt at forma duplex, nec faemina dici Nec puer ut possint, neutrumque et utrumque videntur.'

Ovid.

Most of the Papers I give the Publick are written on Subjects that never vary, but are for ever fixt and immutable. Of this kind are all my more serious Essays and Discourses; but there is another sort of Speculations, which I consider as Occasional Papers, that take their Rise from the Folly, Extravagance, and Caprice of the present Age. For I look upon my self as one set to watch the Manners and Behaviour of my Countrymen and Contemporaries, and to mark down every absurd Fas.h.i.+on, ridiculous Custom, or affected Form of Speech that makes its Appearance in the World, during the Course of these my Speculations. The Petticoat no sooner begun to swell, but I observed its Motions. The Party-patches had not time to muster themselves before I detected them. I had Intelligence of the Coloured Hood the very first time it appeared in a Publick a.s.sembly. I might here mention several other the like Contingent Subjects, upon which I have bestowed distinct Papers. By this Means I have so effectually quashed those Irregularities which gave Occasion to 'em, that I am afraid Posterity will scarce have a sufficient Idea of them, to relish those Discourses which were in no little Vogue at the time when they were written. They will be apt to think that the Fas.h.i.+ons and Customs I attacked were some Fantastick Conceits of my own, and that their Great-Grand-mothers could not be so whimsical as I have represented them. For this Reason, when I think on the Figure my several Volumes of Speculations will make about a Hundred Years hence, I consider them as so many Pieces of old Plate, where the Weight will be regarded, but the Fas.h.i.+on lost.

Among the several Female Extravagancies I have already taken Notice of, there is one which still keeps its Ground. I mean that of the Ladies who dress themselves in a Hat and Feather, a Riding-coat and a Perriwig, or at least tie up their Hair in a Bag or Ribbond, in imitation of the smart Part of the opposite s.e.x. As in my Yesterday's Paper I gave an Account of the Mixture of two s.e.xes in one Commonwealth, I shall here take notice of this Mixture of two s.e.xes in one Person. I have already shewn my Dislike of this Immodest Custom more than once; but in Contempt of every thing I have hitherto said, I am informed that the Highways about this great City are still very much infested with these Female Cavaliers.

I remember when I was at my Friend Sir ROGER DE COVERLY'S about this time Twelve-month, an Equestrian Lady of this Order appeared upon the Plains which lay at a distance from his House. I was at that time walking in the Fields with my old Friend; and as his Tenants ran out on every side to see so strange a Sight, Sir ROGER asked one of them who came by us what it was? To which the Country Fellow reply'd, 'Tis a Gentlewoman, saving your Wors.h.i.+p's Presence, in a Coat and Hat. This produced a great deal of Mirth at the Knight's House, where we had a Story at the same time of another of his Tenants, who meeting this Gentleman-like Lady on the High-way, was asked by her _whether that was_ Coverly-Hall, the Honest Man seeing only the Male Part of the Querist, replied, _Yes, Sir_; but upon the second Question, _whether_ Sir ROGER DE COVERLY _was a married Man_, having dropped his Eye upon the Petticoat, he changed his Note into _No, Madam_.



Had one of these Hermaphrodites appeared in _Juvenal's_ Days, with what an Indignation should we have seen her described by that excellent Satyrist. He would have represented her in a Riding Habit, as a greater Monster than the Centaur. He would have called for Sacrifices or Purifying Waters, to expiate the Appearance of such a Prodigy. He would have invoked the Shades of _Portia_ or _Lucretia_, to see into what the _Roman_ Ladies had transformed themselves.

For my own part, I am for treating the s.e.x with greater Tenderness, and have all along made use of the most gentle Methods to bring them off from any little Extravagance into which they are sometimes unwarily fallen: I think it however absolutely necessary to keep up the Part.i.tion between the two s.e.xes, and to take Notice of the smallest Encroachments which the one makes upon the other. I hope therefore that I shall not hear any more Complaints on this Subject. I am sure my She-Disciples who peruse these my daily Lectures, have profited but little by them, if they are capable of giving into such an Amphibious Dress. This I should not have mentioned, had not I lately met one of these my Female Readers in _Hyde Park_, who looked upon me with a masculine a.s.surance, and c.o.c.ked her Hat full in my Face.

For my part, I have one general Key to the Behaviour of the Fair s.e.x.

When I see them singular in any Part of their Dress, I conclude it is not without some Evil Intention; and therefore question not but the Design of this strange Fas.h.i.+on is to smite more effectually their Male Beholders. Now to set them right in this Particular, I would fain have them consider with themselves whether we are not more likely to be struck by a Figure entirely Female, than with such an one as we may see every Day in our Gla.s.ses: Or, if they please, let them reflect upon their own Hearts, and think how they would be affected should they meet a Man on Horseback, in his Breeches and Jack-Boots, and at the same time dressed up in a Commode and a Night-raile.

I must observe that this Fas.h.i.+on was first of all brought to us from _France_, a Country which has Infected all the Nations of _Europe_ with its Levity. I speak not this in derogation of a whole People, having more than once found fault with those general Reflections which strike at Kingdoms or Commonwealths in the Gross: A piece of Cruelty, which an ingenious Writer of our own compares to that of _Caligula_, who wished the _Roman_ People had all but one Neck, that he might behead them at a Blow. I shall therefore only Remark, that as Liveliness and a.s.surance are in a peculiar manner the Qualifications of the _French_ Nation, the same Habits and Customs will not give the same Offence to that People, which they produce among those of our own Country. Modesty is our distinguis.h.i.+ng Character, as Vivacity is theirs: And when this our National Virtue appears in that Female Beauty, for which our _British_ Ladies are celebrated above all others in the Universe, it makes up the most amiable Object that the Eye of Man can possibly behold.

C.

No. 436. Monday, July 21, 1712. Steele

'Verso pollice vulgi Quemlibet occidunt Populariter.'

Juv.

Being a Person of insatiable Curiosity, I could not forbear going on _Wednesday_ last to a Place of no small Renown for the Gallantry of the lower Order of _Britons_, namely, to the Bear-Garden at _Hockley in the Hole_; [1] where (as a whitish brown Paper, put into my Hands in the Street, informed me) there was to be a Tryal of Skill to be exhibited between two Masters of the n.o.ble Science of Defence, at two of the Clock precisely. I was not a little charm'd with the Solemnity of the Challenge, which ran thus:

"_I_ James Miller, _Serjeant, (lately come from the Frontiers of_ Portugal_) Master of the n.o.ble Science of Defence, hearing in most Places where I have been of the great Fame of_ Timothy Buck _of_ London, _Master of the said Science, do invite him to meet me, and exercise at the several Weapons following_, viz.

Back-Sword, Single Falchon, Sword and Dagger, Case of Falchons, Sword and Buckler, Quarter Staff."

If the generous Ardour in _James Miller_ to dispute the Reputation of _Timothy Buck_, had something resembling the old Heroes of Romance, _Timothy Buck_ return'd Answer in the same Paper with the like Spirit, adding a little Indignation at being challenged, and seeming to condescend to fight _James Miller_, not in regard to _Miller_ himself, but in that, as the Fame went out, he had fought _Parkes_ of _Coventry_.

[2] The Acceptance of the Combat ran in these Words:

"_I_ Timothy Buck _of_ Clare-Market, _Master of the n.o.ble Science of Defence, hearing he did fight Mr._ Parkes _of_ Coventry, _will not fail (G.o.d Willing) to meet this fair Inviter at the Time and Place appointed, desiring a clear Stage and no Favour._

Vivat Regina."

I shall not here look back on the Spectacles of the _Greeks_ and _Romans_ of this kind, but must believe this Custom took its rise from the Ages of Knight-Errantry; from those who lov'd one Woman so well, that they hated all Men and Women else; from those who would fight you, whether you were or were not of their Mind; from those who demanded the Combat of their Contemporaries, both for admiring their Mistress or discommending her. I cannot therefore but lament, that the terrible Part of the ancient Fight is preserved, when the amorous Side of it is forgotten. We have retained the Barbarity, but lost the Gallantry of the old Combatants. I could wish, methinks, these Gentlemen had consulted me in the Promulgation of the Conflict. I was obliged by a fair young Maid whom I understood to be called _Elizabeth Preston_, Daughter of the Keeper of the Garden, with a Gla.s.s of Water; whom I imagined might have been, for Form's sake, the general Representative of the Lady sought for, and from her Beauty the proper _Amarillis_ on these Occasions. It would have ran better in the Challenge, _I_ James Miller, _Serjeant, who have travelled Parts abroad, and came last from the Frontiers of_ Portugal, _for the Love of_ Elizabeth Preston, _do a.s.sert, That the said_ Elizabeth is the Fairest of Women. Then the Answer; _I_ Timothy Buck, _who have stay'd in_ Great Britain _during all the War in Foreign Parts, for the Sake of_ Susanna Page, _do deny that_ Elizabeth Preston _is so fair as the said_ Susanna Page. Let _Susanna Page_ look on, and I desire of _James Miller_ no Favour.

This would give the Battel quite another Turn; and a proper Station for the Ladies, whose Complexion was disputed by the Sword, would animate the Disputants with a more gallant Incentive than the Expectation of Money from the Spectators; tho' I would not have that neglected, but thrown to that Fair One, whose Lover was approved by the Donor.

Yet, considering the Thing wants such Amendments, it was carried with great Order. _James Miller_ came on first, preceded by two disabled Drummers, to shew, I suppose, that the Prospect of maimed Bodies did not in the least deter him. There ascended with the daring _Miller_ a Gentleman, whose Name I could not learn, with a dogged Air, as unsatisfied that he was not Princ.i.p.al. This Son of Anger lowred at the whole a.s.sembly, and weighing himself as he march'd around from Side to Side, with a stiff Knee and Shoulder, he gave Intimations of the Purpose he smothered till he saw the Issue of this Encounter. _Miller_ had a blue Ribband tied round the Sword Arm; which Ornament I conceive to be the Remain of that Custom of wearing a Mistress's Favour on such Occasions of old.

_Miller_ is a Man of six Foot eight Inches Height, of a kind but bold Aspect, well-fas.h.i.+oned, and ready of his Limbs: and such Readiness as spoke his Ease in them, was obtained from a Habit of Motion in Military Exercise.

The Expectation of the Spectators was now almost at its Height, and the Crowd pressing in, several active Persons thought they were placed rather according to their Fortune than their Merit, and took it in their Heads to prefer themselves from the open Area, or Pitt, to the Galleries. This Dispute between Desert and Property brought many to the Ground, and raised others in proportion to the highest Seats by Turns for the s.p.a.ce of ten Minutes, till _Timothy Buck_ came on, and the whole a.s.sembly giving up their Disputes, turned their Eyes upon the Champions.

Then it was that every Man's Affection turned to one or the other irresistibly. A judicious Gentleman near me said, _I could methinks be_ Miller's _Second, but I had rather have_ Buck _for mine_. _Miller_ had an Audacious Look, that took the Eye; _Buck_ a perfect Composure, that engaged the Judgment. _Buck_ came on in a plain Coat, and kept all his Air till the Instant of Engaging; at which time he undress'd to his s.h.i.+rt, his Arm adorned with a Bandage of red Ribband. No one can describe the sudden Concern in the whole a.s.sembly; the most tumultuous Crowd in Nature was as still and as much engaged, as if all their Lives depended on the first Blow. The Combatants met in the Middle of the Stage, and shaking Hands as removing all Malice, they retired with much Grace to the Extremities of it; from whence they immediately faced about, and approached each other, _Miller_ with an Heart full of Resolution, _Buck_ with a watchful untroubled Countenance; _Buck_ regarding princ.i.p.ally his own Defence, _Miller_ chiefly thoughtful of annoying his Opponent. It is not easie to describe the many Escapes and imperceptible Defences between two Men of quick Eyes and ready Limbs, but _Miller's_ Heat laid him open to the Rebuke of the calm _Buck_, by a large Cut on the Forehead. Much Effusion of Blood covered his Eyes in a Moment, and the Huzzas of the Crowd undoubtedly quickened the Anguish.

The a.s.sembly was divided into Parties upon their different ways of Fighting; while a poor Nymph in one of the Galleries apparently suffered for _Miller_, and burst into a Flood of Tears. As soon as his Wound was wrapped up, he came on again with a little Rage, which still disabled him further. But what brave Man can be wounded into more Patience and Caution? The next was a warm eager Onset, which ended in a decisive Stroke on the Left Leg of _Miller_. The Lady in the Gallery, during this second Strife, covered her Face; and for my Part, I could not keep my Thoughts from being mostly employed on the Consideration of her unhappy Circ.u.mstance that Moment, hearing the Clash of Swords, and apprehending Life or Victory concerned her Lover in every Blow, but not daring to satisfie her self on whom they fell. The Wound was exposed to the View of all who could delight in it, and sowed up on the Stage. The surly Second of _Miller_ declared at this Time, that he would that Day Fortnight fight Mr. _Buck_ at the same Weapons, declaring himself the Master of the renowned _Gorman_; but _Buck_ denied him the Honour of that couragious Disciple, and a.s.serting that he himself had taught that Champion, accepted the Challenge.

There is something in Nature very unaccountable on such Occasions, when we see the People take a certain painful Gratification in beholding these Encounters. Is it Cruelty that administers this Sort of Delight?

Or is it a Pleasure which is taken in the Exercise of Pity? It was methought pretty remarkable, that the Business of the Day being a Tryal of Skill, the Popularity did not run so high as one would have expected on the Side of _Buck_. Is it that People's Pa.s.sions have their Rise in Self-Love, and thought themselves (in spite of all the Courage they had) liable to the Fate of _Miller_, but could not so easily think themselves qualified like _Buck_?

_Tully_ speaks of this Custom with less Horrour than one would expect, though he confesses it was much abused in his Time, and seems directly to approve of it under its first Regulations, when Criminals only fought before the People.

'Crudele Gladiatorum spectaculum et inhumanum nonnullis videri solet; et haud scio annon ita sit ut nunc fit; c.u.m vero sontes ferro depugnabant, auribus forta.s.se multa, oculis quidem nulla, poterat esse fortior contra dolorem et mortem disciplina.

The Shows of Gladiators may be thought barbarous and inhumane, and I know not but it is so as it is now practised; but in those Times when only Criminals were Combatants, the Ear perhaps might receive many better Instructions, but it is impossible that any thing which affects our Eyes, should fortifie us so well against Pain and Death.' [3]

T.

[Footnote 1: See note on p. 118, vol. i. [Footnote 2 of No. 31.]]

[Footnote 2: John Sparkes of Coventry has this piece of biography upon his tombstone:

'To the memory of Mr. John Sparkes, a native of this city; he was a man of a mild disposition, a gladiator by profession, who, after having fought 350 battles in the princ.i.p.al parts of Europe with honour and applause, at length quitted the stage, sheathed his sword, and, with Christian resignation, submitted to the grand victor in the 52nd year of his age.

_Anno salutis humanae_, 1733.'

Serjeant James Miller afterwards became a captain, and fought in Scotland, under the Duke of c.u.mberland in 1745.]

[Footnote 3: Tuscul. Quaest. lib. II., De Tolerando Dolore.]

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