War Prisoner Chapter 91

After the medicine had been applied, Su Yi and Wanyan Xu looked at the translucent-looking ointment, already beginning to be absorbed into the skin of Su Yi's crippled leg, which was already showing some signs of atrophy from disuse. They really could not dare to believe that with just this seemingly simple method of treatment, Su Yi's leg could make a complete recovery.

“Su Su, does it hurt?” Wanyan Xu asked anxiously. Judging from the force with which he was clutching Su Yi's arm, it would seem that he was actually the one who the ointment had been applied to and he was now in deathly pain.

“It does not.” Su Yi patted his lover's arm in a comforting manner. In his heart, he had already made a firm resolution --- no matter how painful it was going to get, he was going to act normally, as if nothing much was happening to him. Just from looking at Wanyan Xu's expression, he could tell that his nerves had been stretched to the breaking point, he was unlikely to be able to sustain more setbacks. 

“How could that be? Xia Er said that it would be extremely painful. Wanyan Xu clumsily stroked Su Yi's broken leg, which had been wrapped with ointment, trying to convince himself that he could help to alleviate some of Su Yi's pain with this action. 

But then, he heard Wanyan Xia say blandly: “It’s of no use, it has not begun to ache. But after the pa.s.sing of an hour, even if you were to cut his flesh with a knife, he would not even notice that pain in comparison to the pain caused by the medicine.” He saw that Wanyan Xu's face had immediately blanched upon hearing his words and after giving a "humph", he said: “You're not the one who has to suffer, how come you are even more afraid than Su Yi?” These words were meant to be consoling, but instead, he saw that Wanyan Xu's eyes had immediately reddened. Looking at this younger brother --- in name, if nothing else --- he said loudly: “I [1] would rather that I am the one, that I am the one with a broken leg and I am the one who has to suffer this pain.”

Wanyan Xia was silent, thinking of that day he had come to beg Wanyan Xia to save Su Yi. His legs had almost become crippled from kneeling in the snow for so long, but he had paid no mind to that, fearing only that any delays in leading him to Su Yi would result in him refusing to treat Su Yi. With that he muttered softly to himself: “What is this thing called love, why does it have the power to make people promise to be together in life and death? [2]” After that, he picked up his chest of medical supplies and began to leave.

Suddenly, he heard Su Yi's calling for him from behind. Wanyan Xia turned back to look, and heard Su Yi say with a soft but solemn voice: “Hold off Shuo Er, don’t let him come here.” In his heart understood Su Yi’s intentions and after a long while he nodded and said: “I’ll do my best.” So saying, he walked out of the room. The only other person left in the room was Wanyan Xu, who stared at Su Yi unblinkingly, alert for even the slightest bit of reaction coming from Su Yi.

Gradually, Su Yi began to feel the effects of the medicine on his leg. Although it was indeed very painful, the sensation was actually the basis for some gladness in Su Yi's heart. For a long time, he had not had any feeling below his knee. Now, he was suddenly able to feel pain there again. Although the intensity of the pain was getting more and more intolerable, for him it was actually a very blessed thing.

“Is it starting to hurt?” Unwilling to overlook even the slightest hint of a difference in expression on Su Yi's face, Wanyan Xu very easily perceived the changes in his beloved. He helplessly caressed that broken leg with a trembling hand, while muttering almost to himself: “What shall we do? Su Su? Are you in a lot of pain? What… what do you want to do? Su Su… do you wish to eat anything? Or do you wish to drink some soup… Why don’t we send of some musicians and dancers to entertain us?”

The waves of pain that were coursing over the area around his knees were getting larger and larger. Su Yi forced himself to endure them and clasping Wanyan Xu's hand, stubbornly said in a calm voice: “It doesn't matter. Wanyan, it is not as difficult to bear as Xia Er described. Aren't there any more memorials that require your attention in the Imperial Study? It is better if you go and evaluate them.” 

He saw that the other party looked like he had not heard anything he said and was still ma.s.saging his leg futilely. Finally he could bear it no more. With a firm grasp, he pulled Wanyan Xu's hand from his leg and shouted: “Wanyan Xu, look at me. Don’t look at my leg, look into my eyes. Listen seriously to me, alright?”

Wanyan Xu had been so anxious that he had almost lost control of his emotions but with Su Yi's sudden roar, he was startled back into his normal frame of mind. At a loss, he stared looked at Su Yi's earnest expression and heard him say seriously: “Wanyan Xu, don’t be like this, do you know how ridiculous you look at the moment? You are not recognisable as yourself now, do you know that? Wanyan, the person I like is that ruler who capably governs all under heaven, who is full of mettle, the Wanyan Xu who would not change for anything or anyone. It is that great hero who would never panic even when met with myriad changes, who would have no fear even when he's facing death. I do not wish to see him reduced to looking so helpless and cowardly. Even if it is because of me, even if it is because he is concerned about me, even if it is indeed true that he is powerless to prevent this broken leg from giving me pain, I still wish to see that he is still able to maintain a calm and collected frame of mind. Wanyan, if you like me, then you should sit by my side and tell me that you will be with me as we conquer this obstacle together. You should not let me see you looking as if you are at a total loss, not knowing what to do. Oh Wanyan, my leg is already causing me a lot of pain; it is very difficult to endure. Since that is unavoidable, please do not let me have to endure immeasurable pain in my heart as well, alright?”

Wanyan Xu looked into Su Yi's eyes; with these few simple sentences Su Yi had already amply expressed his own feelings for Wanyan Xu. Suddenly he grabbed his beloved in a tight embrace, not allowing him to see the tears gathered in his eyes that Wanyan Xu was about to lose control over. He stroked his beloved's head of fine black hair, as he replied, saying each word clearly and meaning them with all his heart: “That’s right, Su Su, we shall endure this together. We shall witness together every little step in the process that will allow you to walk normally once again.”

“This is more like the man that I, Su Yi have chosen.” Su Yi smiled at him comfortingly. Very good, Wanyan... He had finally managed to emerge from the shadow that had been cast over him by his feelings of guilt and regret. With that thought, even the pain that had gradually penetrated into the very marrow of his bones seemingly relented in its intensity. He rested his head on his lover's broad shoulder, revelling in that unique and unmatched feeling of ease, he muttered: “Just like this, Wanyan, let me lean on you. I’ll sleep for a while leaning on you, I like… you holding me like this…” He did not need to say the rest of his words, his head gradually drooped down into Wanyan Xu's embrace and Su Yi closed his eyes blissfully. A few beads of sweat slipped off his forehead, pa.s.sing by his relaxed brows, his cheeks that were graced with a smile and the corner of his mouth, which were slightly upturned. Finally, it fell onto the red carpet that lined the floor of the room and dissipated without a trace.