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Mother Aegypt and Other Stories.
by Kage Baker.
Leaving His Cares Behind.
The young man opened his eyes. Bright day affronted them. He groaned and rolled over, pulling his pillow about his ears. After thirty seconds of listening to his brain pound more loudly than his heart, he rolled over again and stared at his comfortless world.
It shouldn't have been comfortless. It had originally been a bijou furnished residence, suitable for a wealthy young person-about-town. That had been when one could see the floor, however. Or the sink.
Or the tabletops. Or, indeed, anything but the chilly wasteland of scattered clothing, empty bottles and unwashed dishes.
He regarded all this squalor with mild outrage, as though it belonged to someone else, and crawled from the strangling funk of his sheets. Standing up was a mistake; the top of his head blew off and hit the ceiling. A suitable place to vomit was abruptly a primary concern.
The kitchen? No; no room in the sink. Bathroom? Too far away. He lurched to the balcony doors, flung them wide and leaned out. A delicate peach souffle, a bowl of oyster broth, a.s.sorted brightly colored trifles that did not yield their ident.i.ties to memory and two bottles of sparkling wine spattered into the garden below.
Limp as a rag he clung to the rail, retching and spitting, s.h.i.+vering in his nakedness. Amused comment from somewhere roused him; he lifted his eyes and saw that half of Deliantiba (or at least the early-morning tradesmen making their way along Silver Boulevard) had watched his performance. He glared at them. Spitting out the last of the night before, he stood straight, turned his affronted back and went inside, slamming the balcony doors behind him.
With some effort, he located his dressing gown (finest velvet brocade, embroidered with gold thread) and matching slippers. The runner answered his summoning bell sooner than he had expected and her thunder at his door 7 brought on more throbbing in his temples. He opened to see the older one, not the young one who was so smitten with him, and cursed his luck.
"Kretia, isn't it?" he said, smiling nonetheless. "You look lovely this morning! Now, I'd like a carafe of mint tea, a plate of crisp wafers and one green apple, sliced thin. Off you go, and if you're back within ten minutes you'll have a gratuity of your very own!"
She just looked at him, hard-eyed. "Certainly, sir," she replied. "Will that be paid for in advance, sir?"
"There goes your treat," he muttered, but swept a handful of a.s.sorted small coins from the nearest flat surface and handed them through the doorway. "That should be enough. Kindly hurry; I'm not a well man."
He had no clean clothing, but while poking through the drifts of slightly less foul linen he found a pair of red silk underpants he was fairly certain did not belong to him, and pulling them on cheered him up a great deal. By the time he had breakfasted and strolled out to meet the new day, Lord Ermenwyr was nearly himself again, and certainly capable of grappling with the question of how he was going to pay his rent for another month.
And grappling was required.
The gentleman at Firebeater's Savings and Loan was courteous, but implacable: no further advances on my lord's quarterly allotment were to be paid, on direct order of my lord's father. Charm would not persuade him; neither would veiled threats. Finally the stop payment order itself was produced, with its impressive and somewhat frightening seal of black wax. Defeated, Lord Ermenwyr slunk out into the suns.h.i.+ne and stamped his foot at a pigeon that was unwise enough to cross his path. It just stared at him.
He strode away, hands clasped under his coattails, thinking very hard. By long-accustomed habit his legs bore him to a certain pleasant villa on Goldwire Avenue, and when he realized where he was, he smiled and rang at the gate. A laconic porter admitted him to Lady Seelice's garden. An anxious-looking maidservant admitted him to Lady Seelice's house. He found his own way to Lady Seelice's boudoir.
Lady Seelice was sitting up in bed, going over the books of her s.h.i.+pping company, and she had a grim set to her mouth. Vain for him to offer to distract her with light conversation; vain for him to offer to ma.s.sage her neck, or brush her hair. He perched on the foot of her bed, looking as winsome as he could, and made certain suggestions. She declined them in an absent-minded sort of way.
He helped himself to sugared comfits from the exquisite little porcelain jar on her bedside table, and ate them quite amusingly, but she did not laugh. He pretended to play her corset like an accordion, but she did not laugh at that either. He fastened her bra.s.siere on his head and crawled around the room on his hands and knees meowing like a kitten, and when she took absolutely no notice of that, he stood up and asked her outright if she'd loan him a hundred crowns.
She told him to get out, so he did.
As he was stamping downstairs, fuming, the anxious maidservant drifted into his path.
"Oh, dear, was she cross with you?" she inquired.
"Your mistress is in a vile mood," said Lord Ermenwyr resentfully, and he pulled her close and kissed her very hard. She leaned into his embrace, making soft noises, stroking his hair. When they came up for air at last, she looked into his eyes.
"She's been in a vile mood these three days. Something's wrong with her stupid old investments."
"Well, if she's not nicer soon, she'll find that her nimble little goat has capered off to greener pastures," said Lord Ermenwyr, pressing his face into the maidservant's bosom. He began to untie the cord of her bodice with his teeth.
"I've been thinking, darling," said the maidservant slowly, "that perhaps it's time we told her the truth about... you know... us."
Unseen under her chin, the lordling grimaced in dismay. He spat out a knot and straightened up at once.
"Well! Yes. Perhaps." He coughed, and looked suddenly pale. "On the other hand, there is the danger-" He coughed again, groped hurriedly for a silk handkerchief and held it to his lips. "My condition is so, ah, tentative. If we were to tell of our forbidden love-and then I were to collapse unexpectedly and die, which I might at any moment, how could I rest in my grave knowing that your mistress had turned you out in the street?"
"I suppose you're right," sighed the maidservant, watching as he doubled over in a fit of coughing.
"Do you want a gla.s.s of wine or anything?"
"No, my darling-" Wheezing, Lord Ermenwyr turned and made his unsteady way to the door. "I think-I think I'd best pay a call on my personal physician. Adieu."
Staggering, choking, he exited, and continued in that wise until he was well out of sight at the end of the avenue, at which time he stood straight and walked on. A few paces later the sugared comfits made a most unwelcome return, and though he was able to lean quickly over a low wall, he looked up directly into the eyes of someone's outraged gardener.
Running three more blocks did not improve matters much. He collapsed on a bench in a small public park and fumed, considering his situation.
"I'm fed up with this life," he told a statue of some Deliantiban civic leader. "Independence is all very well, but perhaps"
He mulled over the squalor, the inadequacy, the creditors, the wretched complications with which he had hourly to deal. He compared it with his former accustomed comforts, in a warm and loving home where he was accorded all the consideration his birth and rank merited. Within five minutes, having given due thought to all arguments pro and con, he rose briskly to his feet and set off in the direction of Silver Boulevard.
Ready cash was obtained by p.a.w.ning one of the presents Lady Seelice had given him (amethysts were not really his color, after all). He dined pleasantly at his favorite restaurant that evening. When three large gentlemen asked at the door whether or not Lord Ermenwyr had a moment to speak with them, however, he was obliged to exit through a side door and across a roof.
Arriving home shortly after midnight, he loaded all his unwashed finery into his trunks, lowered the trunks from his window with a knotted sheet, himself exited in like manner, and dragged the trunks a quarter-mile to the caravan depot. He spent the rest of the night there, dozing fitfully in a corner, and by dawn was convinced he'd caught his death of cold.
But when his trunks were loaded into the baggage cart, when he had taken his paid seat amongst the other pa.s.sengers, when the caravan master had mounted into the lead cart and the runner signaled their departure with a blast on her brazen trumpet-then Lord Ermenwyr was comforted, and allowed himself to sneer at Deliantiba and all his difficulties there as it, and they, fell rapidly behind him. The caravan master drew a deep breath, deciding to be patient.
"Young man, your friends must have been having a joke at your expense," he said. "There aren't any country estates around here. We're in the b.l.o.o.d.y Greenlands. n.o.body's up here but bandits, and demons and wild beasts."
"No need to be alarmed on my behalf, good fellow," the young man a.s.sured him. "There'll be bearers along to meet me in half an hour. That's their cart-track right there, see?"
The caravan master peered at what might have been a rabbit's trail winding down to the honest paved road. He followed it up with his eyes until it became lost in the immensity of the forests. He looked higher still, at the black mountain towering beyond, and shuddered. He knew what lay up there. It wasn't something he told his paying pa.s.sengers about, because if he were ever to do so, no amount of bargain fares could tempt them to take this particular shortcut through the wilderness.
"Look," he said, "I'll be honest with you. If I let you off here, the next thing anyone will hear of you is a note demanding your ransom. If the G.o.ds are inclined to be merciful! There's a Red House station three days on. Ride with us that far, at least. You can send a message to your friends from there."
"I tell you this is my stop, Caravan Master," said the young man, in such a snide tone the caravan master thought: To h.e.l.l with him.
"Offload his trunks, then!" he ordered the keymen, and marched off to the lead cart and resumed his seat. As the caravan pulled away, the other pa.s.sengers looked back, wondering at the young man who sat down on his luggage with an air of unconcern and pulled out a jade smoking-tube, packing it with fragrant weed.
"I hope his parents have other sons," murmured a traveling salesman. Something howled in the depths of the forest, and he looked fearfully over his shoulder. In doing so, he missed seeing the young man lighting up his smoke with a green fireball. Alien he looked back, a bend in the road had already hidden the incautious youth.
Lord Ermenwyr, in the meanwhile, sucked in a double lungful of medicinal smoke and sighed in contentment. He leaned back, and blew a smoke ring.
"That's my unpaid rent and cleaning fee," he said to himself, watching it dissipate and wobble away.
He sucked smoke and blew another.
"That's my little misunderstanding with Bra.s.shandle the moneylender," he said, as it too faded into the pure air. Giggling to himself, he drew in a deep, deep store of smoke and blew three rings in close formation.
"Your hearts, ladies! All of you. Byebye now! You'll find another toy to amuse yourselves, I don't doubt. All my troubles are magically wafting away- oh, wait, I should blow one for that stupid business with the public fountain-"
When he heard the twig snap, however, he sat up and gazed into the darkness of the forest.
They were coming for him through the trees, and they were very large. Some were furred and some were scaled, some had great fanged pitilessly grinning mouths, some had eyes red as a dying campfire just before the night closes in. Some bore spiked weapons. Some bore treebough clubs. They shared no single characteristic of feature or flesh, save that they wore, all, livery black as ink.
"It's about time you got here," said Lord Ermenwyr. Rising to his feet, he let fall the glamour that disguised his true form.
"Master!" cried some of that dread host, and "Little Master!" cried others, and they abased themselves before him.
"Yes, yes, I'm glad to see you too," said Lord Ermenwyr. "Take special care with my trunks, now I'll have no end of trouble getting them to close again, if they're dropped and burst open."
"My little lord, you look pale," said the foremost creature, doffing his spiked helmet respectfully.
"Have you been ill again? Shall we carry you?"
"I haven't been well, no," the lordling admitted. "Perhaps you ought."
The leader knelt immediately, and Lord Ermenwyr hopped up on his shoulder and clung as he stood, looking about with satisfaction from the considerable height.
"Home!" he ordered, and that uncouth legion bore him, and his trunks, and his unwashed linen, swiftly and with chants of praise to the great black gate of his father's house. The Lord Ermenwyr was awakened next morning by an apologetic murmur, as one of the maidservants slipped from his bed. He acknowledged her departure with a sleepy grunt and a wave of his hand, and rolled over to luxuriate in dreams once more. Nothing disturbed his repose further until the black and purple curtains of his bed were drawn open, reverently, and he heard a sweet chime that meant his breakfast had just arrived on a tray.
"Tea and toast, little Master," someone growled gently. "The toast crisp, just as you like it, and a pot of hyacinth jam, and Hrekseka the Appalling remembered you like that shrimp-egg relish, so here's a puff pastry filled with it for a savory Have we forgotten anything? Would you like the juice of blood oranges, perhaps?"
The lordling opened his eyes and smiled wide, stretched lazily.
"Yes, thank you, Krasp," he said, and the steward-who resembled nothing so much as an elderly werewolf stuck in mid-trans formation-bowed and looked sidelong at an attendant, who ran at once to fetch a pitcher of juice. He meanwhile set about arranging Lord Ermenwyr's tray on his lap, opening out the black linen napery and tucking it into the lace collar of the lordling's nights.h.i.+rt, and pouring the tea.
"And may I say, Master, on behalf of the staff, how pleased we are to see you safely returned?" said Krasp, stepping back and turning his attention to laying out a suit of black velvet.
"You may," said Lord Ermenwyr. He spread jam on his toast, dipped it into his tea and sucked at it noisily. "Oh, bliss. It's good to be back, too. I trust the parents are both well?'
Krasp genuflected. "Your lord father and your lady mother thrive, I rejoice to say."
"Mm. Of course. Siblings all in reasonably good health, I suppose?"
"The precious offspring of the Master and his lady continue to grace this plane, my lord, for which we in the servant's hall give thanks hourly."
"How nice," said Lord Ermenwyr. He sipped his tea and inquired further: "I suppose n.o.body's run a spear through my brother Eyrdway yet?"
The steward turned with a reproachful look in his sunken yellow eye. "The Variable Magnificent continues alive and well, my lord," he said, and held up two pairs of boots of b.u.t.ter-soft leather. "The plain ones, my lord, or the ones with the spring-loaded daggers in the heels?"
"The plain ones," Lord Ermenwyr replied, yawning. "I'm in the bosom of my family after all."
When he had dined, when he had been washed and lovingly groomed and dressed by a succession of faithful retainers, when he had admired his reflection in a long mirror and pomaded his beard and moustaches-then Lord Ermenwyr strolled forth into the corridors of the family manse, to see what amus.e.m.e.nt he might find.
He sought in vain.
All that presented itself to his quick eye was the endless maze of halls, hewn through living black basalt, lit at intervals by flickering witchlight or smoking flame, or here and there by a shaft of tinted sunbeam, from some deep-hewn arrowslit window sealed with panes of painted gla.s.s. At regular intervals armed men-well, armed males-stood guard, and each bowed respectfully as he pa.s.sed, and bid him good-morning.
He looked idly into the great vaulted chamber of the baths, with its tiled pools and scented atmosphere from the orchids that twined, luxuriant, on trellises in the steamy air; but none of his sisters were in there.
He leaned on a bal.u.s.trade and gazed down the stairwell, at the floors descending into the heart of the mountain. There, on level below level to the vanis.h.i.+ng point of perspective, servants hurried with laundry, or dishes, or firewood. It was rea.s.suring to see them, but he had learned long since that they would not stop to play.
He paused by a window and contemplated the terraced gardens beyond, secure and sunlit, paradise cleverly hidden from wayfarers on the dreadful slopes below the summit. Bees droned in white roses, or blundered sleepily in orchards, or hovered above reflecting pools. Though the bowers of his mother were beautiful beyond the praise of poets, they made Lord Ermenwyr want to scream with ennui.
He turned, hopeful, at the sound of approaching feet.
"My lord." A tall servant bowed low. "Your lord father requests your presence in his accounting chamber."
Lord Ermenwyr bared his teeth like a weasel at bay. All his protests, all his excuses, died unspoken at the look on the servant's face. He reflected that at least the next hour was unlikely to be boring.
"Very well, then," he said, and followed where the servant led him.
By the time he had crossed the threshold, he had adopted a suitably insouciant att.i.tude and compiled a list of clever things to say. All his presence of mind was required to remember them, once he had stepped into the darkness beyond.
His father sat in a shaft of light at the end of the dark hall, behind his great black desk, in his great black chair. For all that was said of him in courts of law, for all that was screamed against him in temples, the Master of the Mountain was not in his person fearful to look upon. For all that his name was spoken in whispers by the caravan-masters, or used to frighten their children, he wore no crown of sins nor cloak of shades. He was big, black- bearded, handsome in a solemn kind of way. His black eyes were calm, patient as a stalking tiger's.
Lord Ermenwyr, meeting those eyes, felt like a very small rabbit indeed.
"Good morning, Daddy" he said, in the most nonchalant voice he could summon.
"Good afternoon, my son," said the Master of the Mountain.
He pointed to a chair, indicating that Lord Ermenwyr should come forward and sit. Lord Ermenwyr did so, though it was a long walk down that dark hall. When he had seated himself, a saturnine figure in nondescript clothing stepped out of the shadows before him.
"Your report, please," said the Master of the Mountain. The spy cleared his throat once, then read from a sheaf of notes concerning Lord Ermenwyr's private pastimes for the last eight months. His expenses were listed in detail, to the last copper piece; his a.s.sociates were named, their addresses and personal histories summarized; his favorite haunts named too, and the amount of time he spent at each.
The Master of the Mountain listened in silence, staring at his son the whole time, and though he raised an eyebrow now and then he made no comment. Lord Ermenwyr, for his part, with elaborate unconcern, drew out his smoking-tube, packed it, lit it, and sat smoking, with a bored expression on his face.
Having finished at last, the spy coughed and bowed slightly. He stepped back into the darkness.
"Well," said Lord Ermenwyr, puffing smoke, "I don't know why you bothered giving me that household accounts book on my last birthday. He kept much better records than I did."
"Fifteen pairs of high-heeled boots?" said the Master of the Mountain, with a certain seismic quality in the ba.s.s reverberation of his voice.
"I can explain that! There's only one cobbler in Deliantiba who can make really comfortable boots that give me the, er, dramatic presence I need," said Lord Ermenwyr. "And he's poor. I felt it was my duty to support an authentic craftsman."
"I can't imagine why he's poor, at these prices," retorted his father. "When I was your age, I'd never owned a pair of boots. Let alone boots of premium- grade elkhide, dyed purple in the new fas.h.i.+on, with five-inch heels incorporating the unique patented Comfort-Spring lift.'"
"You missed out on a lot, eh? If you wore my size, I'd give you a pair," said Lord Ermenwyr, cool as snowmelt, but he tensed to run all the same.
His father merely stared at him, and the lordling exhaled another plume of smoke and studied it intently. When he had begun to sweat in spite of himself, his father went on: "Is your apothecary an authentic craftsman too?"
"You can't expect me to survive without my medication!" Lord Ermenwyr cried. "And it's d.a.m.ned expensive in a city, you know."