The Englishman from Paris Part 9

_Sir Robert._ The lawyers will be here immediately.

_Jack._ And in the mean time here come two Persons to whom I must speak a few words, towards compleating this day's Business.

(_Enter_ ABBe _and_ FLORID _very drunk_)

_Abbe._ (_Sings_) Quand je suis a Table, tout me rejouit--ah! Pardie!

You are ver fine Party dere altogether.

_Florid._ Had not you better come and indulge the Social Affections over the remainder of the Bottle?

_Jack._ A very pretty condition for a travelling Governor.

_Florid._ That amazing connexion between the Organs of bodily Sensation, and the faculties of Moral Perception.

_Jack._ Take him out of the Room; he shall be discharg'd to-morrow morning, as a vain Pretender to a Philosophy which his conduct shews him to be incapable of relis.h.i.+ng. I remember when I was at the University I heard that several Men of distinguished Genius, were admirers of that System, and in their hands it may have its l.u.s.tre, but Mr. Florid's principles, shew that he is very little enamour'd with the Ideas of Beauty and Nature.

_Harriet._ And pray Sir, when you dismiss him, give him back this Letter.

_Jack._ (_Reads_) "To Miss Harriet Quicksett--Ideas of Beauty and Virtue--good and beautiful are the same--enjoy with me Order, Harmony, and Proportion, O--sweetest of Sensations--Moral Sense--Eternal admirer, with the most enthusiastic Imagination. Florid." A very honest design, and agreeable to his moral fitness of things.

_Florid._ Why, there is no Incongruity in the Claim. Let me try it upon my Muscles, that's the way I always try a Proposition--for Ridicule being the Test of Truth--if the incongruous appearances provoke my Muscles to the Sensation of Laughter, my mind is urged to reject the claim with a gay contempt.

_Jack._ Take him out of the Room.

_Florid._ The Pleasures of a mislike Apprehension--thou Plastic Nature--empower'd Creatures etc. (_Exit_)

_Abbe._ Mais mon Chevalier de Broughton, what sort of dress is dat?

_Jack._ Ecoutez Monsieur l'Abbe, I brought you over to write Remarks on the English Nation, but shall no longer harbour a conceal'd Enemy to my Country. As the frolick was mine it's fit that I pay for it and you shall be supply'd with Money to carry you back to your own Country.

_Abbe._ Il faut que je retourne donc?

_Jack._ You must, Sir, and when you are arriv'd, divest yourself of your Prejudices; don't follow the Example of Voltaire and Abbe Le Blanc, but dare to speak the Truth. Tell your countrymen _you heard here of a King determin'd to prosecute a vigorous War, but more desirous of an honorable Peace--tell 'em we have Ministers who understand the true Interest of their country, and are determin'd to maintain the just rights of Great Britain--tell 'em_ that plain good Sense, honor, honesty, and a regard for our word, are the characteristicks of the English Nation--and tell 'em the most ridiculous object you saw in this country is a Frenchify'd Englishman.

_Abbe._ Mais, Monsieur, est-il possible!

_Jack._ No more Monsieur l'Abbe--I wish you well, and take my leave.

_Abbe._ Pardie! Den I must go back. I shall now go play a game at Trick-Track with my friend Monsieur d'Eschallot, and den I look over my little Memorandum. To-morrow Morning, I take my Party to go back to Paris. I a.s.sure you Monsieur de Broughton, you have now give me ver pretty Memorandum--and so Messieurs and Mesdames, a l'honneur. I shall represent your liberalite--and love Shakespeare more than ever.

(_Exit singing_)

_Quicksett._ Wounds! Sir Robert, what a pity it had been, this young fellow shou'd be lost, and I believe I shall rejoice in him for a son-in-Law.

_Jack._ I hope it will prove so, and now since we are happy together let mirth conclude the Evening, and let us my dear Wildfire celebrate our Reformation with an English Country Dance.

_Wildfire._ With all my Heart, and in good time; here come some other visitors that will joyn us.

_Jack._

The wide Extremes of modern Life, you've seen, The home-bred, Blood, the travel'd c.o.xcomb's mien, But let not riot, Virtue's place supply, Nor Gallic affectation mock the Eye.

So shall all politeness grow from Sense alone, And the fair smile with Beauties all their own.

_FINIS_