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"He will be here soon, if he comes to-night," Lady Clavering said, "and it will be better that he should find me alone."
"Will it be better?"
"Yes, yes. Cannot you see how he would frown and shake his head if you were here? I would sooner be alone when he comes. Good-night. You have been very kind to me; but you are always kind. Things are done kindly always at your house, because there is so much love there. You will write to Julia for me. Good-night." Then Mrs. Clavering kissed her and went, thinking as she walked home in the dark to the rectory, how much she had to be thankful in that these words had been true which her poor neighbor had spoken. Her house was full of love.
Chapter XXIII
Sir Hugh's Return
For the next half hour Lady Clavering sat alone listening with eager ear for the sound of her husband's wheels, and at last she had almost told herself that the hour for his coming had gone by, when she heard the rapid grating on the gravel as the dog-cart was driven up to the door.
She ran out on to the corridor, but her heart sank within her as she did so, and she took tightly hold of the bal.u.s.trade to support herself. For a moment she had thought of running down to meet him; of trusting to the sadness of the moment to produce in him, if it were but for a minute, something of tender solicitude; but she remembered that the servants would be there, and knew that he would not be soft before them. She remembered also that the housekeeper had received her instructions, and she feared to disarrange the settled programme. So she went back to the open door of the room, that her retreating step might not be heard by him as he should come up to her, and standing there she still listened.
The house was silent and her ears were acute with sorrow. She could hear the movement of the old woman as she gently, tremblingly, as Lady Clavering knew, made her way down the hall to meet her master. Sir Hugh of course had learned his child's fate already from the servant who had met him; but it was well that the ceremony of such telling should be performed. She felt the cold air come in from the opened front door, and she heard her husband's heavy, quick step as he entered. Then she heard the murmur of Hannah's voice; but the first word she heard was in her husband's tones, "Where is Lady Clavering?" Then the answer was given, and the wife, knowing that he was coming, retreated to her chair.
But still he did not come quite at once. He was pulling off his coat and laying aside his hat and gloves. Then came upon her a feeling that at such a time any other husband and wife would have been at once in each other's arms. And at the moment she thought of all that they had lost.
To her her child had been all and everything. To him he had been his heir and the prop of his house. The boy had been the only link that had still bound them together. Now he was gone, and there was no longer any link between them. He was gone, and she had nothing left to her. He was gone, and the father was so alone in the world, without any heir and with no prop to his house. She thought of all this as she heard his step coming slowly up the stairs. Slowly he came along the pa.s.sage, and though she dreaded his coming, it almost seemed as though he would never be there.
When he had entered the room she was the first to speak. "Oh, Hugh!" she exclaimed, "oh, Hugh!" He had closed the door before he uttered a word, and then he threw himself into a chair. There were candles near to him, and she could see that his countenance also was altered. He had indeed been stricken hard, and his half-stunned face showed the violence of the blow. The harsh, cruel, selfish man had at last been made to suffer.
Although he had spoken of it and had expected it, the death of his heir hit him hard, as the rector had said.
"When did he die?" asked the father.
"It was past four, I think." Then there was again silence, and Lady Clavering went up to her husband and stood close by his shoulder. At last she ventured to put her hand upon him. With all her own misery heavy upon her, she was chiefly thinking at this moment how she might soothe him. She laid her hand upon his shoulder, and by degrees she moved it softly to his breast. Then he raised his own hand, and with it moved hers from his person. He did it gently; but what was the use of such nonsense as that?
"The Lord giveth," said the wife, "and the Lord taketh away." Hearing this, Sir Hugh made with his head a gesture of impatience. "Blessed be the name of the Lord," continued Lady Clavering. Her voice was low and almost trembling, and she repeated the words as though they were a task which she had set herself.
"That's all very well in its way," said he, "but what's the special use of it now? I hate twaddle. One must bear one's misfortune as one best can. I don't believe that kind of thing ever makes it lighter."
"They say it does, Hugh."
"Ah, they say! Have they ever tried? If you have been living up to that kind of thing all your life, it may be very well; that is as well at one time as another. But it won't give me back my boy."
"No, Hugh, he will never come back again; but we may think that he's in heaven."
"If that is enough for you, let it be so. But don't talk to me of it. I don't like it. It doesn't suit me. I had only one, and he has gone. It is always the way." He spoke of the child as having been his--not his and hers. She felt this, and understood the want of affection which it conveyed; but she said nothing of it.
"Oh, Hugh, what could we do? It was not our fault."
"Who is talking of any fault? I have said nothing as to fault. He was always poor and sickly. The Claverings generally have been so strong.
Look at myself and Archie, and my sisters. Well, it cannot be helped.
Thinking of it will not bring him back again. You had better tell some one to get me something to eat. I came away, of course, without any dinner."
She herself had eaten nothing since the morning, but she neither spoke nor thought of that. She rang the bell, and going out into the pa.s.sage, gave the servant the order on the stairs. "It is no good my staying here," he said. "I will go and dress. It is the best not to think of such things--much the best. People call that heartless, of course; but then people are fools. If I were to sit still, and think of it for a week together, what good could I do?"
"But how not to think of it? That is the thing."
"Women are different, I suppose. I will dress, and then go down to the breakfast-room. Tell Saunders to get me a bottle of champagne. You will be better also if you will take a gla.s.s of wine."
It was the first word he had spoken which showed any care for her, and she was grateful for it. As he arose to go, she came close to him again, and put her hand very gently on his arm. "Hugh," she said, "will you not see him?"
"What good will that do?"
"I think you would regret it if you were to let them take him away without looking at him. He is so pretty as he lies in his little bed. I thought you would come with me to see him." He was more gentle with her than she had expected, and she led him away to the room which had been their own, and in which the child had died.
"Why here?" he said, almost angrily, as he entered.
"I have had him here with me since you went."
"He should not be here now," he said, shuddering. "I wish he had been moved before I came. I will not have this room any more; remember that."
She led him up to the foot of the little cot, which stood close by the head of her own bed, and then she removed a handkerchief which lay upon the child's face.
"Oh, Hugh! oh, Hugh!" she said, and throwing her arms round his neck, she wept violently upon his breast. For a few moments he did not disturb her, but stood looking at his boy's face. "Hugh, Hugh," she repeated, "will you not be kind to me? Do be kind to me. It is not my fault that we are childless."
Still he endured her for a few moments longer. He spoke no word to her, but he let her remain there with her head upon his breast.
"Dear Hugh, I love you so truly!"
"This is nonsense," said he; "sheer nonsense." His voice was low and very hoa.r.s.e. "Why do you talk of kindness now?"
"Because I am so wretched."
"What have I done to make you wretched?"
"I do not mean that; but if you will be gentle with me, it will comfort me. Do not leave me here all alone, how my darling has been taken from me."
Then he shook her from him, not violently, but with a persistent action.
"Do you mean that you want to go up to town?" he said.
"Oh, no; not that."
"Then what is it you want? Where would you live, if not here?"
"Anywhere you please, only that you should stay with me."
"All that is nonsense. I wonder that you should talk of such things now.
Come away from this, and let me go to my room. All this is trash and nonsense, and I hate it." She put back with careful hands the piece of cambric which she had moved, and then, seating herself on a chair, wept violently, with her hands closed upon her face. "That comes of bringing me here," he said. "Get up, Hermione. I will not have you so foolish.
Get up, I say. I will have the room closed till the men come."
"Oh, no!"
"Get up, I say, and come away." Then she rose, and followed him out of the chamber; and when he went to change his clothes, she returned to the room in which he had found her. There she sat and wept, while he went down and dined and drank alone. But the old housekeeper brought her up a morsel of food and a gla.s.s of wine, saying that her master desired that she would take it.
"I will not leave you, my lady, till you have done so," said Hannah. "To fast so long must be bad always."