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"I yesterday received my dear J----'s letter, which gives fresh cause for thankfulness. The more my absence is lengthened, the less I am able to support the want of intelligence. Let us all bless G.o.d together for all his mercies: among those which are temporal, health is the chief; and I believe to most mothers it is more valued in their children than in their own persons. I rejoice with you over our restored J----y. O that our covenant G.o.d may give the more important blessing of divine life. You had need to be importunate for this, after the importunity exercised for natural life. I thank G.o.d also for the alleviation of your own distress, for our dear D----'s restoration from complaints less alarming so far as they existed, but which might have been the seeds of serious affliction.
"I could go on enumerating, for causes of thankfulness crowd into my mind; but all are swallowed up in the grand mercy, the distinguis.h.i.+ng mercy of redeeming love to our souls. Salvation, not only to me, but to my house. Oh, all words fail here. Read over with me, sing with me, in your heart, the 103d Psalm. O my G.o.d, dare I even sigh in thy presence, under any temporal pain, or hurt of body or mind, with such a Father, such a Christ, such a Comforter, such a richly-furnished well-ordered covenant, such a const.i.tution of grace and providence--O, such an all in all, even 'all the fulness of G.o.d.'
My G.o.d and the G.o.d of my seed, the G.o.d of my house; yea, and the G.o.d of my prodigal, who shall in heaven, if never on earth, join the song, 'To him that loved us and washed us from our sins in his own blood, be glory, honor, dominion, power, and praise, for ever and ever. Amen.' O shall a murmur ever pa.s.s these lips, shall this unthankful heart indulge even a sigh over any object but sin; shall I shrink from any cross with such a crown? Father, glorify thy name.
"I have been to church; the subject, 'be not weary in well-doing.' Many arguments were adduced for exertion; but the gospel was wanting. O that my friends could hear our shepherd; he would sound his Master's voice more in unison with their own hearts' experience, and views of new covenant provision and gospel motives: except in the Baptist congregations, the gospel is much mutilated here, and kept out of sight even by the few who are supposed to build upon it.
"Sabbath next brings round your--I will add, my gospel feast. I will endeavor to meet you to-morrow evening, and to have you all on my heart, then and on the Sabbath, in that one Lord, one faith, one Spirit, one G.o.d and Father of all, who is above all, through all, and in all redeemed to himself by Jesus Christ, and sanctified by that one Spirit uniting all. What subjects! I cannot attain to the comprehension, but I experience the truth and enjoy the comfort of them."
The two following letters, addressed to a young lady whose acquaintance Mrs. Graham made while at Boston, show how tenderly she sympathized with the feelings of the young, and how earnestly she sought their good.
To Miss M----, Boston.
"There was, my dear Miss M----, something in your countenance and manner, at our last interview, which has dwelt on my mind ever since.
Your former attentions, which I also marked, I attributed to the natural benevolence of your heart; but your following a stranger, an old woman, of whom you know so little, and whom you were likely never to see again, to solicit her friends.h.i.+p and an interest in her prayers, spoke a language beyond nature. Either my sweet friend has already chosen G.o.d in Christ to be her portion, and his love in her heart powerfully draws her to every one in whom she thinks she discerns his image, or she conceives that this world cannot give her happiness even in this life; and impressed with the importance of that which is to come, she wishes to cast in her lot among G.o.d's people, that she may know the good of his chosen and rejoice in their joy, and become a partaker of that peace which the Saviour bequeathed to his disciples when about to leave them: 'Peace I leave with you. My peace I give unto you; not as the world giveth, give I unto you; let not your heart be troubled, neither let it be afraid.'
"Let me congratulate my friend, which ever of these be the case.
If the first, you have, or will soon have, a peace which the world can neither give nor take away; if the last, the Saviour stands at the door of your heart and knocks, soliciting that heart which has too long been hunting shadows and vanity. If your soul is dissatisfied with the things of the world, and tired with disappointment, cast a longing eye to the fountain of happiness. This is the claim of that G.o.d whose name is love: 'My son, give me thy heart.' 'Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.' 'In the world ye shall have tribulation, but in me ye shall have peace.'
Be a.s.sured, my dear friend, if you could obtain all of this world that your heart could wish for, you would find vanity written on the possession. Nothing short of G.o.d himself can give happiness to the soul; and exactly in proportion as man becomes weaned from the world, and his affections centre in G.o.d, is he in possession of happiness.
"But how is this to be attained? By G.o.d's own plan, and no other.
As many weary themselves in vain, hunting the shadows of time; so, many great philosophers, sensible of this great truth, that G.o.d alone can satisfy the rational soul, also weary themselves in vain, because they will not seek the blessing in G.o.d's own way. 'When the world by wisdom knew not G.o.d, it pleased him by the foolishness of preaching'--what was esteemed so--'to save them that believe.' 'I thank thee, O Father, that thou hast hid these things from the wise and prudent, and hast revealed them unto babes.'
"The Saviour said, 'Ye will not come to me, that ye might have life. No man can come to the Father but by me. I am the way, the truth, and the life.' 'Search the Scriptures, for in them ye think ye have eternal life, and they are they which testify of me.' The Scripture testifies what our own hearts must a.s.sent to, that human nature is depraved and corrupt; broken off from G.o.d; at a distance from him by sin; enmity against him in his true character; opposed to his holy law, in its extent and spirituality: we are also helpless, dead in trespa.s.ses and sins. 'O Israel, thou hast destroyed thyself'--blessed be G.o.d for what follows--'but in me is thy help.'
"The same Scripture which testifies the misery of man, reveals also his remedy--a remedy of G.o.d's own providing, by which man may be restored to the image and favor of G.o.d, and to that communion with him which is life and bliss. 'G.o.d so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth on him might not perish, but have everlasting life: for G.o.d sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through him might be saved. And this is life eternal, that ye believe on him whom he hath sent.' When man becomes convinced that he is lost, helpless, wretched, lying at mercy, and submits to the method of G.o.d's own providing; casts himself on the mercy of G.o.d in Christ, and coming to him, rests on his free promise, 'Him that cometh to me, I will in no wise cast-out;' disclaiming all confidence in himself, or in his own works, he accepts of G.o.d's offered grace, in G.o.d's own way, a _free_ and _finished_ salvation. This is the record of G.o.d, that he giveth unto us eternal life, and this life is in his Son; who, of G.o.d, is made unto us wisdom, and righteousness, and sanctification, and complete redemption. Believing this, according to his faith it shall be. Christ shall be in him, 'a well of water springing up to everlasting life.' He will shed abroad his love in his heart, and according to his promise, give him power to become a child of G.o.d.
The Holy Ghost, the Comforter, shall be given unto him, to teach him the knowledge of the Scriptures, and to become a principle of holiness in his heart. Then shall he find that wisdom's ways are ways of pleasantness, and all her paths peace; then shall he experience the blessedness of that man whose G.o.d is the Lord; then is the way open for communion and converse with G.o.d the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost.
"If, my dear Miss M----, I have made myself understood, you have my view of G.o.d's method of making his creatures happy; and I believe he will make us to know that he is a sovereign G.o.d, and that there is no other name, or method, by which men can be saved, but the name of Christ Jesus. But, take nothing on my word, nor the word of any creature; search the Scriptures; read the first eight chapters of the Romans, the whole of the Ephesians: stumble not at mysteries--pa.s.s them over, and take the milk for babes; pray for the teaching of the Spirit; and let me recommend to you the advice of Mr. Newton, in his Omicron's Letters, a book well worth your reading. 'Lay not too much stress on detached texts, but seek for the sense which is most agreeable to the general strain of Scripture.'
"My dear Miss M----, I am now old, and I hope have done with the world; but I have been young and drunk deeply of youth's choicest pleasures. I was blest with the best and most indulgent of parents; I was the wife of a man of sense, sentiment, and sensibility, who was my very first love and lover; and that love ripened and improved with years. My children were good and healthy; love, health, peace, and competency blessed our dwelling. I had also, in early life, taken hold of G.o.d's covenant, and tasted his covenant love; and devoted myself to his service, which was in my mind a principle of moderation, compared with mere worldlings; but very far was I from that non-conformity to the world which the precept of the gospel requires. Had I kept close to my covenant G.o.d, enjoyed his bounty with thankfulness, occupied my talents, devoted my time to usefulness and communion with him; had I prayed against corruption within and temptation without, the Lord would have directed my steps and held up my goings, and I should have continued to inherit the earth, and should not have been diminished.
But this was very far from being my conduct; the bent of the natural, unrenewed heart, is still opposed to G.o.d; and the best are sanctified only in part, while in this life; the law in the members still wars against the law of the Spirit of life in the mind. The goodness of G.o.d, which ought to have been a powerful motive to grat.i.tude, love, and diligence, was misimproved; I enjoyed the gifts, and forgot the giver; 'hugged my comforts to death.' Many, many light chastis.e.m.e.nts, my dear, my kind, my indulgent heavenly Father exercised me with; I had many repenting seasons under his strokes, many manifestations of pardon I received, and many fresh and solemn dedications of my heart, life, and substance did I make; but no sooner was ease and comfort restored, than my heart turned aside like a deceitful bow: my whole life, from fifteen till the thirtieth year of my age, was one continued succession of departure and backsliding on my part--of chastening, forgiving, restoring, and comforting on the part of my G.o.d.
"He did not cast me off, but dealt with me according to the const.i.tution of his well-ordered covenant: 'If his children,'
Christ's, 'forsake my law and walk not in my judgments, if they break my statutes and keep not my commandments, then will I visit their transgression with the rod, and their iniquity with stripes.
Nevertheless, my loving-kindness will I not utterly take from him, nor suffer my faithfulness to fail; my covenant will I not break, nor alter the thing that is gone out of my lips.' Psalm 89:30. This is the covenant--made with Christ as the head of all who believe--of which I took hold in early life; my G.o.d kept me to my choice, and manifested his own faithfulness and the stability of his covenant. When lighter afflictions proved ineffectual, he at last, at one blow, took from me all that made life dear, the very kernel of all my earthly joys, my idol, my beloved husband. Then I no longer halted between two opinions; my G.o.d became my all. I leave it as my testimony, that he has been a father to the fatherless, a husband to the widow, the stranger's s.h.i.+eld and orphan's stay. Even to h.o.a.r hairs and to old age he has carried me, and not one good word has failed of all that he has promised. 'He has done all things well,' and at this day I am richer and happier than ever I was in my life. Not that I am yet made free from sin, that is still my burden--want of love and grat.i.tude, indolence in commanded duty, self-will, and nestling in the creature.
But my heart's wish and earnest desire is conformity to the divine will. The bent of my will is for G.o.d; and if my heart deceive me not, my G.o.d is the centre of my best affections. It is by grace that I am what I am, and the same grace engages to perfect the work begun.
"This G.o.d is my G.o.d; he will guide me even unto death, through death, and be my portion to eternity. This G.o.d I recommend to my friend; and this well-ordered covenant, this all-sufficient Saviour, for your acceptance: the Bible for your guide, pray to G.o.d for his Holy Spirit to lead you to the knowledge of the very truth as it is in Jesus. Accept this as a testimony of friends.h.i.+p, and believe me
"Yours, in love,
"I. GRAHAM."
To the same.
"NOVEMBER 2, 1800.
"You have, I find, been the child of affliction: she is a stern, rugged nurse; but blessed often are the lessons she teaches. I have, says G.o.d, chosen thee in the furnace of affliction. It is G.o.d's ordinary way of drawing sinners to himself, either to dry up or imbitter the streams of worldly comfort, that he may shut them up to seek that comfort that depends not on any transitory source.
"I have no doubt but you shall yet sing with the royal Psalmist, 'It is good for me that I have been afflicted; for before I was afflicted I went astray, but now I have kept thy word. Blessed is the man thou chastenest, O Lord, and teachest him out of thy law.' Many are the texts to the same purport; take them for your consolation as a part of G.o.d's well-ordered covenant.
"You have met with a late bereavement, which has entered deep into your soul. We are not called to stoicism, but to tenderness of heart and spirit. Jesus wept with the two sisters over a brother's grave. But still, the Christian's spirit must be resigned, and say, and try to say with cheerfulness, 'Not my will, but thine be done.'
And Oh, my friend, great will be the wisdom and happy the acquisition, if every new bereavement enlarge the room for divine love in the heart, and be filled up with that most n.o.ble, most blessed of principles. Seek not, my friend, to replace friends.h.i.+p with any mere worldling; beg of G.o.d to fill up the vacuum, then will you be a great gainer.
"Why hesitate to join the church? Let not a sense of unworthiness keep you back--a deep sense of unworthiness is one grand part of due preparation; and no worthiness of yours can give you any t.i.tle to that new testament in Christ's blood, which was shed for the remission of sins. Worthless, vile, empty, helpless is every son and daughter of Adam's race: but it was for the unG.o.dly that Christ died; it was while we were without strength; his name was called Jesus, because he should save his people from their sins. In that day, that great day of the feast, Jesus stood among a mixed mult.i.tude, and cried, 'If any man thirst, let him come to me and drink--whosoever will, let him take the water of life freely.'
"If conscious at the time it is the supreme desire of your soul to be washed in his blood, clothed with his righteousness, sanctified by his Spirit, go and take this water of life freely; go as a _sinner_ to a _Saviour_; go at his command, put honor on his appointment, and repeat the dedication of all that you _are_, _have_, or _can_ have, over the symbols of his body broken for you, his blood shed for you; go, trusting in his mercy, and leave all to his management, believing that _he will_ shed abroad his love in your heart, order your footsteps in his ways, and in due time perfect his image in your soul. Keep close to him in the use of means, but look beyond the means for life and power. I commit you to our G.o.d and Saviour, and pray that he may be to you 'wisdom, righteousness, sanctification,' and complete 'redemption.'
"I am, my dear Miss M----,
"Your ever affectionate,
"I.G."
In March, 1801, the health of her daughter Mrs. B----, requiring a sea-voyage and absence from care, Mr. and Mrs. B---- sailed for Britain, and the following letters were addressed to them during their absence:
"MARCH 23, 1801.
"MY DEAR CHILDREN--This is mortifying to us all that you should be anch.o.r.ed half a mile from us, and there lie for hours; but even this, trifling as it may appear, has its end to answer in _His_ scheme, without whom 'not a sparrow falls.' I have retired with my Bible, to commit you, and all my cares and concerns, afresh to that G.o.d whose goodness and mercy have followed us through life; who is my G.o.d, your G.o.d, and the G.o.d of our children; who answered my prayers in opposition to my inconsistent conduct; took you out of my idolatrous management into his own more merciful guidance. He has done all things well, and he will perfect his own work.
"Now, may the Angel that redeemed you, be with you, keep you in the hollow of his hand, and as the apple of his eye; be with you on his own ocean, and command the billows not to touch you; carry you to the bosom of your dear native country, where a large proportion of his body live in him and by him; bless you, and make you a blessing wherever his providence shall carry you, and restore you with blessings to us, in his own time. Amen."
"SABBATH, after morning service, March 29.
"This, my dear children, is a day of storm, wind, and rain. O that the prayer of our dear pastor, and I hope of many present, may be with you, and be answered to and for you: Lord, be with that family, who now, on the mighty ocean, desire an interest in our prayers. May he whom winds and waves obey, preserve them in this tempestuous season; may they see and improve his wonders in the great deep; may the blessings of the everlasting gospel preserve their souls in peace, conduct them in safety to their destined port, and restore them to us, enriched with the blessings of thy well-ordered covenant.
"I sent two notes for the Dutch churches, enclosed to Mr. B----; one for Wall-street, to Mr. A----, and one for the Brick church, to Mr. M----. I watered all with my tears.
"FIVE O'CLOCK."
"O, how it blows and rains. O my children, how my poor heart aches for you; if not in danger, yet sick, and in much discomfort. I gave a note in the old church in the afternoon, supposing the congregation on this dreadful day to be different. Mr. M---- prayed: "The Angel of thy presence be with them; give them much of the consolations of thy Spirit. Conduct them in safety to the place of their destination, and restore them, enriched with thy blessing, to wors.h.i.+p with us again in this thy house of prayer.' I write on this day merely to record, for your perusal, the prayers of your church. I think you ought, if the Lord conduct you safe, to propose public thanks to that G.o.d who heard and answered, if agreeable to Mr. M----.
Write me how it was with you on this day. Now I will go to a throne of grace for you and all of us. O keep close to the Lord; may he save you from a dissipated, trifling, carnal spirit; may he sanctify all your comforts, and give you a just estimation of all you see and hear: may the Christian's portion rise more and more; and the world and its vanities sink in your view."
"APRIL 10.
"What the Lord is going to do with his and my children I know not; but the Samuel Elam has returned to port with a leak, after being out nineteen days. On the day of storm, she had seven feet of water in her hold. I hope the Lord, in mercy to you, to his church, and to me his unworthy servant, has guided you in safety, and that the prayers of his church were answered in your behalf. O, my children, what would be the situation of my heart had I not confidence of your being within the ark. I desire to rejoice over all my fears, for this unspeakable consolation, that nothing can hurt you. I experience for you what I did in my own case, when darkness and tempest added to the horrors of many, while our vessel kept das.h.i.+ng on the rock: I, too, expected her to go to pieces every moment; but the idea was ever with me, 'in the bosom of G.o.d's ocean, I shall find the bosom of my Saviour.' On the night of the 29th of March I dreamt my dear J----y fell overboard, and I saw her floating on the billows, supporting herself by her little chair: this is the state of my mind; yet I am thankful, and enjoy much peace. The Lord has given me what I have asked--the salvation of your souls. In a little time we shall all be gathered around his throne.
Well may I leave to him all intervening circ.u.mstances, as well as who goes first, and how. O how he blesses my latter end, how he soothes and comforts my old age; far other things have I merited, that my soul knows; but he has not only pardoned, but comforts, and draws a veil over my transgressions, covering them from the world's observation.
What can I say? He is G.o.d, a G.o.d of mercy."