Redemption and two other plays Part 55

MaRYA KONSTANTiNOVNA. But we met him just now upstairs!

BETSY. Why need you remember that? Vovo, are you there?

[PETRiSTCHEF enters.

PETRiSTCHEF. Vovo is not here, but I am prepared to fulfil on his behalf anything that may be required. How do you do? How do you do, Marya Konstantinovna?

[Shakes hands long and violently with BETSY, and then with MaRYA KONSTANTiNOVNA.

SECOND PEASANT. See, it's as if he were pumping water!

BETSY. You can't replace him,--still you're better than n.o.body.

(Laughs.) What are these affairs of yours with Vovo?

PETRiSTCHEF. What affairs? Our affairs are fie-nancial that is, our business is fie! It's also nancial, and besides it is financial.

BETSY. What does nancial mean?

PETRiSTCHEF. What a question! It means nothing, that's just the point.

BETSY. No, no, you have missed fire.

[Laughs.

PETRiSTCHEF. One can't always. .h.i.t the mark, you know. It's something like a lottery. Blanks and blanks again, and at last you win!

[THEODORE IVaNITCH goes into the study.

BETSY. Well, this was blank then; but tell me, were you at the Mergasofs' last night?

PETRiSTCHEF. Not exactly at the Mere Gasof's, but rather at the Pere Gasof's, or better still, at the Fils Gasof's.

BETSY. You can't do without puns. It's an illness. And were the Gypsies there? [3]

[Laughs.

PETRiSTCHEF (sings). "On their ap.r.o.ns silken threads, little birds with golden heads!"....

BETSY. Happy mortals! And we were yawning at Fofo's.

PETRiSTCHEF (continues to sing). "And she promised and she swore, she would ope' her ... her ... her...." how does it go on, Marya Konstantinovna?

MaRYA KONSTANTiNOVNA. "Closet door."

PETRiSTCHEF. How? What? How, Marya Konstantinovna?

BETSY. Cessez, vous devenez impossible! [4]

PETRiSTCHEF. J'ai cesse, j'ai bebe, j'ai dede....[5]

BETSY. I see the only way to rid ourselves of your wit is to make you sing! Let us go into Vovo's room, his guitar is there. Come, Marya Konstantinovna, come!

[Exeunt BETSY, MaRYA KONSTANTiNOVNA, and PETRiSTCHEF.

FIRST PEASANT. Who be they?

GREGORY. One is our young lady, the other is a girl who teaches her music.

FIRST PEASANT. Administrates learning, so to say. And ain't she smart?

A reg'lar picture!

SECOND PEASANT. Why don't they marry her? She is old enough, I should say.

GREGORY. Do you think it's the same as among you peasants,--marry at fifteen?

FIRST PEASANT. And that man, for example, is he also in the musitional line?

GREGORY (mimicking him). "Musitional," indeed! You don't understand anything!

FIRST PEASANT. That's just so. And stupidity, one might say, is our ignorance.

THIRD PEASANT. Oh, Lord!

[Gypsy songs and guitar accompaniment are heard from VASiLY LEONiDITCH'S room.

[Enter SIMON, followed by TaNYA, who watches the meeting between father and son.

GREGORY (to SIMON). What do you want?

SIMON. I have been to Mr. Kaptchitch.

GREGORY. Well, and what's the answer?

SIMON. He sent word he couldn't possibly come to-night.

GREGORY. All right, I'll let them know.

[Exit.

SIMON (to his father). How d'you do, father! My respects to Daddy Efim and Daddy Mitry! How are all at home?

SECOND PEASANT. Very well, Simon.

FIRST PEASANT. How d'you do, lad?

THIRD PEASANT. How d'you do, sonny?

SIMON (smiles). Well, come along, father, and have some tea.