Shakespeare's First Folio - LightNovelsOnl.com
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La. Well: that fault may be mended with a breakfast: read on
Sp. Item, she hath a sweet mouth
La. That makes amends for her soure breath
Sp. Item, she doth talke in her sleepe
La. It's no matter for that; so shee sleepe not in her talke
Sp. Item, she is slow in words
La. Oh villaine, that set this downe among her vices; To be slow in words, is a womans onely vertue: I pray thee out with't, and place it for her chiefe vertue
Sp. Item, she is proud
La. Out with that too: It was Eues legacie, and cannot be t'ane from her
Sp. Item, she hath no teeth
La. I care not for that neither: because I loue crusts
Sp. Item, she is curst
La. Well: the best is, she hath no teeth to bite
Sp. Item, she will often praise her liquor
La. If her liquor be good, she shall: if she will not, I will; for good things should be praised
Sp. Item, she is too liberall
La. Of her tongue she cannot; for that's writ downe she is slow of: of her purse, shee shall not, for that ile keepe shut: Now, of another thing shee may, and that cannot I helpe. Well, proceede
Sp. Item, shee hath more haire then wit, and more faults then haires, and more wealth then faults
La. Stop there: Ile haue her: she was mine, and not mine, twice or thrice in that last Article: rehea.r.s.e that once more
Sp. Item, she hath more haire then wit
La. More haire then wit: it may be ile proue it: The couer of the salt, hides the salt, and therefore it is more then the salt; the haire that couers the wit, is more then the wit; for the greater hides the lesse: What's next?
Sp. And more faults then haires
La. That's monstrous: oh that that were out
Sp. And more wealth then faults
La. Why that word makes the faults gracious: Well, ile haue her: and if it be a match, as nothing is impossible
Sp. What then?
La. Why then, will I tell thee, that thy Master staies for thee at the North gate
Sp. For me?
La. For thee? I, who art thou? he hath staid for a better man then thee
Sp. And must I goe to him?
La. Thou must run to him; for thou hast staid so long, that going will scarce serue the turne
Sp. Why didst not tell me sooner? 'pox of your loue Letters
La. Now will he be swing'd for reading my Letter; An vnmannerly slaue, that will thrust himselfe into secrets: Ile after, to reioyce in the boyes correctio[n].
Exeunt.
Scena Secunda.
Enter Duke, Thurio, Protheus.
Du. Sir Thurio, feare not, but that she will loue you Now Valentine is banish'd from her sight
Th. Since his exile she hath despis'd me most, Forsworne my company, and rail'd at me, That I am desperate of obtaining her
Du. This weake impresse of Loue, is as a figure Trenched in ice, which with an houres heate Dissolues to water, and doth loose his forme.
A little time will melt her frozen thoughts, And worthlesse Valentine shall be forgot.
How now sir Protheus, is your countriman (According to our Proclamation) gon?
Pro. Gon, my good Lord
Du. My daughter takes his going grieuously?
Pro. A little time (my Lord) will kill that griefe
Du. So I beleeue: but Thurio thinkes not so: Protheus, the good conceit I hold of thee, (For thou hast showne some signe of good desert) Makes me the better to confer with thee
Pro. Longer then I proue loyall to your Grace, Let me not liue, to looke vpon your Grace
Du. Thou know'st how willingly, I would effect The match betweene sir Thurio, and my daughter?
Pro. I doe my Lord
Du. And also, I thinke, thou art not ignorant How she opposes her against my will?
Pro. She did my Lord, when Valentine was here
Du. I, and peruersly, she perseuers so: What might we doe to make the girle forget The loue of Valentine, and loue sir Thurio?
Pro. The best way is, to slander Valentine, With falsehood, cowardize, and poore discent: Three things, that women highly hold in hate
Du. I, but she'll thinke, that it is spoke in hate
Pro. I, if his enemy deliuer it.
Therefore it must with circ.u.mstance be spoken By one, whom she esteemeth as his friend
Du. Then you must vndertake to slander him
