Daisy in the Field - LightNovelsOnl.com
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I added no remark upon Mr. De Saussure's or his sisters'
peculiar way of enjoying themselves.
"But you _are_ uncommonly silent," he went on presently; - "_triste_, _reveuse_. It is impossible not to suffer from it, - in one who values your words as much as I do."
"Why, I thought you were apt to look upon things from a different point of view, - not from mine," I said.
"I must be wrong then - always. Miss Randolph, you are of a gentle and kind disposition, - I wish you would be my Mentor!"
"I am not old enough to be Mentor," I said.
"To be mine! Yes, you are," he rejoined eagerly. "I would not have you a day older."
"I shall be that to-morrow," I said, laughing.
"But if you were mine," he said, changing his tone, "every day would only add to your power and your qualifications for doing me good. And I know that is what you love."
"I cannot see that I have done you the least good, so far, Mr.
De Saussure," I said, amused. "I think you must be mistaken."
"Will you try, Daisy?" he said insinuatingly, and stopping short in our walk.
"Try what, Mr. De Saussure?" I said, beginning to be bewildered.
"Surely you know! You are a little cruel. But you have the right. Be my Mentor - be my darling - promise to be, one of these days, my wife."
I dropped my arm from Mr. De Saussure's and stood in a maze, I might say with truth, frightened. Up to that minute, no suspicion of his purpose or mind regarding me had entered my thoughts. I suppose I was more blind than I ought to have been; and the truth was, that in the utter preoccupation of my own heart, the idea that I could like anybody else but Mr.
Thorold, or that anybody else could like me, had been simply out of sight. I knew myself so thoroughly beyond anybody's reach, the prior possession of the ground was so perfect and settled a thing, that I did not remember it was a fact hidden from other eyes but mine. And I had gone on in my supposed walled-in safety; - and here was somebody presuming within the walls, who might allege that I had left the gate open.
However, to do Mr. De Saussure justice, I never doubted for a moment that his heart might be in any danger of breaking if I thrust him out. But for all that, I lost my breath in the first minute of discovery of what I had been doing.
"You hesitate," said he. "You shall command me, Daisy. I will go instantly, hard as it would be, and give all my power to furthering the war at home; - or, if you bid me, I will keep out of it, which would be harder still, were you not here instead of there. Speak, won't you, -a good word for me?"
"You must do nothing at my command, Mr. de Saussure," I said.
"I have known you only as mamma's and my brother's friend; - I never thought you had any other feeling; and I had no other towards you."
"Mrs. Randolph _is_ my friend," he said eagerly. "She does me the honour to wish well to my suit. She looks at it, not with my eyes, but with the eyes of prudence; and she sees the advantages that such an arrangement would secure. I believe she looks at it with patriotic eyes too. You know my estates are nearly adjoining to yours. I may say too, that our families are worthy one of another. But there, I am very conscious, my worthiness ends. I am not personally deserving of your regard - I can only promise under your guidance to become so."
A light broke upon me.
"Mr. De Saussure" - I began; but he said hastily, "Let us go on - they are coming near us;" and I took his offered arm again, not wis.h.i.+ng more than he to have spectators or hearers of our talk; and now that the talk was begun, I wished to end it.
"Mr. de Saussure," I said, "you are under a serious mistake.
You speak of my estates; I must inform you that I shall never, under any circ.u.mstances, be an heiress. Whoever marries me - if I ever marry - will marry a poor girl."
"Pardon me -" he began.
"Yes," said I interrupting him; - "I know of what I speak."
"What can you mean, Miss Randolph?"
"I a.s.sure you, I mean exactly what I say. Pray take it so."
"But I do not understand you."
"Understand this, - that I shall be a penniless woman; or something very like it. I am making no jest. I am no heiress - as people think."
"But you confound me, Miss Randolph," he said, looking both curious and incredulous. "May I ask, what can be the explanation of your words? I know your Magnolia property - and it is, I a.s.sure you, a very n.o.ble one, and unenc.u.mbered.
Nothing can hinder you from inheriting it - at some, we hope, of course, very distant day."
"Nevertheless," I said, "if I live to see that day, I shall be very poor, Mr. De Saussure."
"You will condescend to explain so extraordinary a statement?"
"Is not my word sufficient?"
"Pardon me, a thousand times; but you must see that I am in a difficulty. Against your word I have the word of two others - your mother and your brother, who both a.s.sure me of the contrary. May it not be, that they know best?"
"No, Mr. De Saussure; for the fact depends on something out of their knowledge."
"It is out of my knowledge too," he said.
I hesitated a little, and then said, -
"I will explain myself, Mr. De Saussure, trusting to your honour to keep silence about it. I am a friend of the coloured people."
"Oh! - So are we all," he said.
"And I will never be rich at their expense."
"By their means, is not necessarily at their expense," he said gently.
"It is at their expense," I repeated. "I do not choose to be rich so. And the religion I live by, forbids me to do to others as I would not like they should do to me."
"I am sure, by that rule, your dependants at Magnolia would implore you not to give them over to other hands. They will never have so kind a mistress. Don't you see?" he said with the same insinuating gentleness.
"I shall give them over to no other hands. I would make them as free as myself."
"Make them free!"
"That is what I would do."
"You cannot mean it," he said.
"You see, Mr. De Saussure, that I shall be very poor."
"You are playing with me."
"I am very serious."
"It is rank Northern madness!" he said to himself. "And it is Mrs. Randolph's daughter. The thing is impossible."