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The place was mostly empty, a few people were sleeping at the tables. The night air was still in the room, it was cool but it smelled bad.
"Bert not here yet?" I said.
"Can't expeck him to leave a cozy bed jes' cause he has a job to do," she said, pouring, "can't ex- peck him to leave his c.h.i.n.k honey."
I took my drink.
" 'Smatter, Blue, that wife o' yourn givin' ye a time?"
"What?"
"Man looks like you do in the mornin', either163 it's his wife or his liver. Ain't got no liver trouble so far as I know."
"You don't look so good yourself," I said. She had no color in her face, she was not so plump any more. "You not enjoying the prosperity, Mae?"
"What do you want, Mayor, G.o.dd.a.m.nit." She was rubbing her forehead. "Don't know what it's like to breathe any more. Used to be jes' the week's end, these days every night is Sat.u.r.day."
Zar came clumping down the stairs. He dressed fancy now. "La la la," he was singing, he came over and pinched Mae's cheek. "Maechka," he said, but she pushed his hand off and went to sit down with her gla.s.s.
"Blue," the Russian turned smiling to me, "you are the man I am meaning to see. I have important business to talk."
"Not now Zar."
"Of course now. You have just to listen." He carefully took from his pocket a folded piece of newspaper. "At Silver City I see there is Company, for three hundred dollars they will go anywhere with steam drill and dig the water."
"So?"
"So I tell you and you won't be mad. I am think- ing closely of sending for them. That way I have my own well."
"Congratulations."
"But not to sell water to others, I promise you that."
Mae laughed. He turned and glared at her.
"Zar," I said, "do what you want. But the minute you put up a well Isaac Maple will too. You know that don't you?"
He shrugged. "What do I care?"164 "Well then why should you think I care what you do? Do what you want and good luck to you." A couple of men walked in the doors and then a few more after them. The day was beginning. I put money on the bar and I walked out.
On the porch a man stepped in front of me: "Mornin" Mayor," he mumbled, "jest wonderin' is there any news-"
"You'll know when I know," I said shortly.
"I know Mayor but I can't-"
"Come over to my place when I'm there," I said. "I got other business just now."
Isaac was on his porch, putting out some wares, I went inside with him and spoke to him for a few minutes. When I was through I went down the street to the cabin. Molly was in the room behind the door and she was asleep, but the dugout was empty.
It was toward the middle of the morning but hot and still enough for afternoon. A few men were walking out of Swede's tent and they were picking their teeth. I went up there and Swede was just coming out carrying a pair of kettles.
"I'm looking for my boy," I said.
"Ya," he smiled, "inside."
Jimmy was not at any of the long tables. A dozen heads glanced up as I looked around. I found him out in back, cross-legged on the ground, rolling pancakes and stuffing them in his mouth. He wouldn't look at me. Swede's wife was stand- ing by him, her hands in her aprpn, smiling as she watched him eat.
"Jimmy you'll come with me," I said.
I dug in my pockets to pay for his breakfast bu Helga shook her head and waved my hand165 down. When he was finished I walked away with- out looking back. I went down the street past Bear's shack, getting on the trail and climbing up. I was feeling short of breath but I kept up my pace and turned off well along the trail, when I saw a flat rock. I picked my way to it and sat down and waited for him. And a minute later he came along and stood a few feet away looking at me.
"Sit down here," I said, "I've got something to say to you." He didn't move. "I won't hurt you, come on."
We sat side by side watching the town below us, a street of houses at the foot of that vast flatland, a small stir of life in all that stillness. A cool breeze blew on the face but down there it wasn't enough to turn the windmill. Horses and mules were tied up along the railings, people were walking this way and that, every now and then a fragment of someone's voice would rise up to our ears, or something would catch the sun and flash in our eyes.
"I brought you up here because I wanted to be sure no one would bother us," I said. "What I have to say is private between you and me. You under- stand that?"
"Sure."
"How old do you reckon you are? Fourteen? Ffteen years?"
"I don'know."
"You're a sight bigger than the day I carried you down from these rocks. You remember that? You took my gun, you were going after that Bad Man killed your Daddy."
My gaze went out beyond the town to the graves in the flats, and I suppose he looked there too. I166 didn't dare look at him, I didn't trust myself to say just what I wanted to say.
"You remember that?"
"Yes."
"I don't think I could carry you now. I don't suppose if you didn't want it I could make you do anything. But I'll tell you: when I got you down to the Indian's shack I put you down too fast. I let you go too quick. I should have made plans for you then and there. But I never had practice being a father before and I didn't know any better."
I felt him looking at me but I kept my own eyes on the town. "Now look at down there. It's not as neat as the town Fee put up, it don't show one man's mark. Just a patch job, spit and old lumber but if he could see it he'd like it. He'd say it was alright."
"How do you know what my Pa would say!"
"I used to talk to him. I know what he valued. He died two years short, it would have pleasured him to see this."
He picked up a stone and tossed it away, watch- ing it bounce down among the rocks.
"Now when he died I said to myself, 'Well he has left a son and I'm going to look after his son and pa.s.s on the lesson I learned from Fee.' It's not something a person could learn in one day or one week. It's something you have to learn into, like carpentry. You understand?"
He said nothing.
"And I knew that, so I never said a word to you. I figured if I did as your father did why that would be the way; if I did everything as Fee would have done it, well you'd learn alright. And you mightn't suffer the loss so bad."167 Down below a woman was filling her buckets at the water tank. A man, it looked like Jenks, was walking into Zar's Palace.
"Course I was wrong, I should have taken you in hand right away and talked to you as I am now. Molly has got to you, it's natural I suppose, but if you grow to the life the way she has, I'm saying it clear as I can Jimmy, you won't have,the idea, you won't be Fee's son any more."
"What do you know-"
"You've got to allow for Molly. She can't give up her suffering."
"My Pa had sand. He weren't no coward."
"Does she call me that? Well now I've got to tell you"-looking at him, feeling the desperation of what I was doing-"probably your Pa did only one shameful thing in his life and that was to rush in after Turner."
"What?"
"That was the one time he was no example to you. He went in there to get himself killed."
"What?"
"It's what you do when a Bad Man comes, Jimmy. I tried to do it too but I am a humbler by nature."
"You better not talk that way about my Pa-" Lord, it made me faint-hearted, it was Fee's face with no lines, a young hairless face with a frown of anger and no understanding at all. "You better not talk that way," it said pursing its lips, "you better not!"
And what did I expect, you can't tell something like that, who will know it? "Jim you can squeeze the trigger and knock down a Bad Man and as sure - as you've been shootin', another will come up in168 his place. They take to this land, they don't need much to grow, just a few folks together will breed 'em, a little noise and they'll spring up out of the empty sh.e.l.ls. Jimmy!"
He had jumped up. Molly was stepping out of the cabin, a small figure in the street below.
"I have spoken to Isaac Maple," I said trying to control my voice. "Isaac will need someone to help him out before long. The Chinagirl is getting too heavy to move around, her time is coming. What do you say to working in Isaac's store? It will be good for you. You're going to work regular hours. You're going to learn reading and writing. You're going to grow up proper with this town and the day will come-"
"She's calling me! Here!" He waved his arms. "I'm here!"
I pulled him down. I took hold of his shoulders and held him down on the rocks. "What kind of a mama's boy are you! How far do I have to take you to get you out of that woman's spell! Listen to me I said the day is coming when no Man from Bodie will ride in but he'll wither and dry up to dust. You hear me? I'm going to see you grow up with your own mind, I'm going to see you settled just like this town, you're going to be a proper man and not some saddle fool wandering around with his grudge. Jimmy listen to me-"
He was struggling under me, a strong boy, not hearing, his face screwed up in hate. And I felt his breath clean as gra.s.s on my face and I talked on and on as if words could do something. "Listen listen," I kept saying but the strength was draining out of me, like hope, and my mind was doing169 another talking: It's too late, and I've done it wrong, I am too late.
He pushed me over and jumped up and de- livered a kick in my side and ran off down the trail. It was a powerful kick and well aimed, I feel it now on a deep breath. Below in the town there was no sign of Molly. But as I sat up and looked I could hear a clatter somewhere and a moment later out of the tent two skirted figures stumbled into the sun, locked together. Someone shouted and people were running from all direc- tions, pouring out of the saloon, the store, to make up a circle around those two. Another moment and I saw Jimmy arrive, ducking into the crowd.
It was Molly rolling around in the dirt witK Swede's wife Helga. Molly had made up her mind to take affront because the woman had been feed- ing up her boy. As I ran down I could hear people yelling encouragement. But by the time I made my way through the circle Jenks and Swede had pulled the two women apart. They stood glaring, wild-haired and gasping, scratched and mussed so you could hardly tell one from the other. Molly's dress was torn in front. "Lookit thet t.i.t," a man said.
Later I stood in the cabin holding a hand to my side, watching the boy bathe her scalp where Helga had pulled out the hair. Molly was moaning on her bed. There was a knock at the door and it was Swede, wringing his hands. Behind him, down the street, was the sound of his ranting wife.
"Blue, dis is a bad tang, my vault, forgive my Helga, my vault-"170 "You big "dumb stupid Swede!" I shouted. I could feel the water come to my eyes. How was it his fault? What in h.e.l.l made him think he must take the blame?
11.I say that was the true end of me no matter what happened after. Sharp as the boy's kick in my side, clear as the pain, was the sudden breathless vision I had of my unending futility. Who as well as I and what I am could have ensured the one's madness and the other's corruption? But we won't think about it: I tried to keep my heart by taking it out of doors. And how long was I able to do that? One week? One hour?
Some of these spring-comers paid for lodging and moved into one of Isaac Maple's cribs. And there was cabin s.p.a.ce for those willing to share beds,, But the town wasn't big enough to take on everyone and n.o.body was doing any more build- ing. Those who had the money to build were mak- ing it too easily in other ways. "Who cares where they stay," Zar said to me, "they are drinking my whiskey, they are bouncing in my beds!" So after a while there were squatters staked out in back of the buildings, living out of their wagons, - lying down for the night under lean-tos. And it began to make trouble.
171.172 I mean people would throw their slops into the alleys. Some didn't care where they did their busi- ness and it got so you were hard put to walk in the street without putting your boot down in a mess. One morning Molly found a drunken man peeing against the door, and it drove her to dis- traction, she cried the whole day. I tried to call a meeting at the well of all the people who owned streetfront, some of them had privies in back, but not all; but only Jenks and Isaac and Swede came. Jenks said: "Jes watch yer step in all yer do. Hit's good fer the land. How do the Indian get his greens up if not by s.h.i.+ttin' on 'em all winter?" Isaac was righteous: "n.o.body cares a d.a.m.n," he said, "but if they all come up with dysentery 'tain't themselves they'll blame but each other. " Isaac had the right sentiment but he was a busy man. It was Swede and I who ended up digging and fenc- ing sumps behind each side of the street. That Swede would do anything you asked of him, he would tilt his head away from his wen and close his eyes and nod yes-no matter what it was.
Well the sumps helped but not much. And there were other troubles too. A few of the job hunters were men not easy to look at, there was one fel- low who had running sores all over his face, an- other, an old man, who was humpbacked with hands twisted and swollen out of shape. Isaac came to me claiming whenever one such came into his store everyone else cleared out and he lost business. It was not true, of course, he just wanted me to run these people out of the town. "Speak to Jenks," I told him, "Jenks is the peace officer here." Then Zar joined the protest, he refused to serve the hunchbacky one day and the man, in resent-173 merit, ran over to Mae and Jessie and waved his crippled hands in front of their eyes. Zar told Bert to throw the poor fellow out but Bert wouldn't step out from behind the bar. The Russian came running to me and I told him he'd best serve the man his drink and he'd leave then twice as fast and with no trouble. "It's easier in the end," I said. But Zar like Isaac was for running these people off and Jenks finally rounded up three or four of them at gunpoint and shooed them away into the flats; but at night they were back, they wanted work like everyone, and for a while they made their way be- hind houses and took their meals behind Swede's tent from what Helga handed out to them though the flap. And after a while they came into the store again and the saloons and so the trouble was not ended but in fact greater, with greater hard feelings.
One morning the egg lady found one of her three chickens with its head wrung off; she was an old- timer in the West and she told her sorrows to n.o.body, but grabbed up her cane and went into Zar's Palace swinging. She must have been a teetotaler to blame only the whiskey for her lost hen, she bruised a number of shoulders and broke some bottles and a row of gla.s.ses Zar had proudly imported from the East before she was finally herded out; and that was my problem too because I was the one who had to gentle her.
The weather was getting hotter; and each morn- ing of prosperity that would start out fresh and easy to breathe was turning into a day more hot and burdensome than the last. Every time Alf's stage came in, or a freight wagon, all I wanted to see was some Eastern engineer, a man in black,174 with plans in his pocket and wages to give out. On Sat.u.r.day night with the miners pouring in the town and the street filling with the noise of frolic from one end to the other I found Angu's Mcell- henny lighting up his pipe in front of the stable.
"If the Company is going to lay a road," I asked him, "why in h.e.l.l don't they start in?"
"Blue it's many years I've been diggin' the earth and I've seen fortunes in my shovel. But I've nought to show for it but my calluses and m' mind is as weak as it ever was. I dinna know."
"Well what do you hear around Angus?"
"Don't pry at me my ferlie friend. I know nothin'. We are diggin' hard six days o' the week and keepin' our eyes on the ground. I can tell you no more."
"Alright Angus. But tell Archie D. Brogan when you see him there's a letter in his name down here."
He took the pipe from his mouth: "Who from?"
"It doesn't say, Angus, it's only his name on the front. You'll tell him?"
He nodded and walked away.
It baffled me that Angus should be so close- mouthed, it wasn't like him. Meanwhile the same questions I had put to him were being asked of other miners and none of them liked it, the hungry looks in the eyes of the towners didn't go well with them. Some newcomers, not happy about waiting around, had gone up the trail looking for work at the lodes; and though they had ridden back, sour- faced, the same day, it didn't sit well with the diggers that a lot of men were in the country wanting jobs. There was no love lost between the two groups that Sat.u.r.day night. The miners, having175 their pay to spend, sort of took over at the saloons. One thing led to another and Jenks was kept fairly busy breaking up scuffles, once or twice he even had to draw his pistol to get things quiet. In our cabin I was at the desk trying to put some order in all my papers, and Molly sat with sewing on her lap, and we heard clearly the screeches of the ladies over at Zar's every time a fight started. Molly's hands shook so she couldn't work the needle, she dropped her hands in her lap and I saw out of the corner of my eye how frightened she was. Every few minutes Jimmy would come rus.h.i.+ng in to tell of the latest fuss, sweat on his forehead and such joy in his eyes he could hardly speak without stammering: "Old J-Jenks, he took care of 'm alright, socked 'm on the head, poom, like th-that-"
"Jimmy," I said, "you stay in here now, go on to bed, it's late. You hear me, son?" But he would never hear me.
He gave one glance to Molly and ran out, leav- ing the door open wide.
She made no move to stop him, sitting there her eyes fixed on nothing, one hand on her throat's cross, the other knuckled against her teeth.
A day or two later and the sun not even up, Bert Albany rapped on the door until I heard him, and with the sleep still in my eyes I went with him up the street to Zar's place. The faro dealer was lying on the floor there, ashen white, and a big red rent in his vest where he had been stabbed. Jenks was standing nearby, clutching the collar of that little hunchback, his gun was drawn and sticking in the man's back. Bert told me the faro dealer had been176 lending out money to people at high rates, some- times winning it back at his table. He had a list, Bert saw it, of the men indebted to him. The hunchbacky had been sitting there losing all of his loan, and when it was gone he jumped up and stuck a knife in the dealer's belly.
The dealer was quiet, concentrating on his breathing, he was in his senses enough to know to lay still. I went out to John Bear's shack. It showed even then the signs of resentment, the door was splintered, a board or two was gone from the roof. I woke the Indian up and gave him to understand there was someone needed doctoring. He came with me up to the saloon but when he saw it was Zar's place and the Russian waiting at the door, he turned on his heel and went back the way he came.
Zar and I carried the dealer up to one of the rooms, Zar being careful every step not to get any of the man's blood on his clothes. Miss Adah, with her hair ia braids and a shawl over her nightdress, said she'd sit with the man and see what she could do.
When I came back down the stairs Jenks and his prisoner were gone, the few people who had watched the goings-on had drifted away. Zar offered me a drink but there wasn't anything I wanted less. Outside was the sound of hammering, and from the porch, in the grey light, I saw Jenks in the front of his stable. He had put the hunch- back in Hausenfield's old boarded-up hea.r.s.e wagon and was nailing the door shut.
"Jenks," I went over to him, "what in G.o.d's name are you doing!"
"Hit'11 do fer a jail, don't ye thank?"177 "You could tie him up without putting him in there!"
"Mayor, I is Shurff an' I ain't seen m' pay yet. Don't you fret, I'll see he's fed and stretches his laigs. Swede'11 proffer his leftovers. This man has stabbed a man, he's got to pay."
"You've thought it all out have you?"
He nodded: "Ah reckon we'll requar that circus jedge," he said solemn with his decision.
I looked at him. "Jenks," I said, "I remember when you used to sleep most of your days and here it is not dawn and it's clear to me you're a changed man, thriving on his duty."
He grinned. "Y'll write thet letter fer me? Per thet jedge?"
"I'll think about it," I said.
The night was paling. I walked back toward the cabin in my untucked s.h.i.+rt and my bootlaces flapping. In the dirt against Isaac's porch a man was asleep. On Zar's steps another was huddled over his knees coughing fit to wake the dead. I should have been feeling sympathy for that dealer but I was feeling the pain of my own breathing.